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Need prayer

Postby PerfectLoveAndForgiveness » Sat Jul 18, 2015 2:50 pm

Hello everyone,

It's been a while since I've even been here. My life has taken on a whole new journey these last 8 months. Just in the last month my life has drastically changed. I found out on June 29th I am pregnant, wow! Surely was not planned at this time in my life but I know that God has other plans in the works. The father of this baby, my fiance, Stephen, was totally shocked as I was. He told me that he was not ready to be a father and was very adamant about it. My heart sank so low. Then he asked me a few hours later if I would abort. My heart sank even deeper. I cried for the rest of the week wondering and asking God what I should do.

Stephen didn't want me telling anyone at the time so I kept this between the two of us but my heart was so heavy and I just wanted so bad to tell my mom who is my closest friend apart from God. My heart hurt so much through this as I carried this burden within me. I was so angry at Stephen for asking me to do such. I knew in my heart what is right. The timing as we think was not right, rather Stephen thought was not right.

On July 8th I drove to my doctor appointment the whole way there I kept asking God to open a door for me to tell my mom. I needed to tell her what is going on. I HAVE to tell someone. I saw my family doctor and had bloodwork drawn and confirmed I am indeed having a baby. I went to my parents afterwards to have a visit. My mom took one look at me and asked me in her mom soft spoken way, just out of the blue, if I was pregnant. I burst into tears and she just grabbed me and held me and told me everything was going to be ok and everything will work out. I needed to hear that so badly and for her to comfort me. I was feeling so lost and alone. I felt so relieved once she knew.

She had told me she had suspected for a week prior to her asking me that question. It's her mom intuition she knows her children very well. I'm so grateful that she is so loving and wonderful. God opened that door because He knew I couldn't carry that anymore. I told my mom how Stephen felt and she shook her head no and said to me this baby is for a reason we just don't understand or know what that reason is right now. God's timing is made perfect for those who love Him.

Stephen and I disagreed so much over the course of the last week, I didn't know what was going to happen between us, and I still don't really know. I told him that I will not go through with the abortion and I am going to raise this child even if I have to do it alone. He was angry, not with me but with himself for making a bad choice. It was both our choice not just his. He tried making me feel guilty but I just have to step up to the responsibility of my actions. A few days ago Stephen began asking me about this pregnancy and how I am feeling. I have been praying that he will find peace and begin accepting that he is going to be a father. Just him asking me that gives me hope that one day, hopefully soon, he will be happy that this happened in his life.

I am feeling really well just tired, weepy, a little sore, no nausea though. I am only 6 weeks 3 days along so it may creep up still. I am at peace with this decision and I have the support of my family which is a huge blessing.

I just ask that you could pray for Stephen and I. That God's will be done, whatever that may be and that this baby will be healthy and be a blessing.

God bless you all!
PLAF
*~* You have to be bold to be great *~*
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PerfectLoveAndForgiveness
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Re: Need prayer

Postby kimby » Sat Jul 18, 2015 3:07 pm

I will pray that God will give all involved in this little one's life a great amount of wisdom. I pray that this baby will know peace and be surrounded by amazing love and support. I pray the same for you as you carry and raise this child. I pray that you and Stephen will both hear God's voice clearly and be given the strength to follow His leading and guidance.

I am glad your mom had the insight to ask you about this so that you weren't carrying the burden of having to be silent any longer!

Please keep us posted. Thank you for sharing with us!
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Re: Need prayer

Postby dema » Sat Jul 18, 2015 8:29 pm

Amen to what Kimby said. *Pray*
Hugs,
Dema
Shame and blame are the devil's tools. With God ALL things are possible.
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Re: Need prayer

Postby Mackenaw » Tue Jul 28, 2015 12:54 am

Hello PerfectLove (((hugs)))

God bless you this day.

Congratulations! Eat good food, get plenty of rest/sleep, and cherish the time as your baby grows. (((((((hugs)))))))

Prayers are rising to our Lord in the name of Jesus on behalf of you, your fiance' and your blessed unborn child. God's will be done.

God bless and keep you.
Love,
Mack
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Re: Need prayer

Postby PerfectLoveAndForgiveness » Tue Jul 28, 2015 11:15 am

A quick update....

Stephen and I have continued talking things out and things are really looking positive. He is wanting to be involved as much as he can be and is being supportive. It's been a tough couple days for both of us. Stephen's father passed away just one year ago on the 26th which was two days ago. Also my father is in the hospital very sick with a blood infection which is very serious, but he is in stable condition. Plus that day marked 9 months for Stephen and I.

So wow, a lot has gone on in our lives over a very short few days. I felt so blessed that Stephen was with me to support me through seeing my dad in the hospital, but he had to leave and go back home on Monday cause he had to be at work for today.

My siblings and nieces and nephews are all here we are all travelling back and forth to the hospital every day. As everyone was gathered around yesterday I announced that they are all going to have a little cousin in March, everyone is excited and now I'm even more excited! Everything that has been going on is a blessing amongst the not so good news. I am so thankful for my family and extended family and soon to be in-laws. God is good even when we walk through storms. He is amazing and is always there looking out for us.
*~* You have to be bold to be great *~*
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Re: Need prayer

Postby dema » Tue Jul 28, 2015 11:47 am

I'm glad you are finding support. Please keep seeking. Sometimes we only seek when the pain is bad instead of all the time as we should. *hug5*
Hugs,
Dema
Shame and blame are the devil's tools. With God ALL things are possible.
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