Christianity Oasis Forum

[mshumphrey]

Hello brothers and sisters. I am new to this counseling website so I hope this first post isn't too bad but I just need some guidance.

I have been a Christian for practically my entire life. I am well versed in church and my Bible. However the past year or so has been difficult for me. I feel like I have built a wall between God and myself. Just last year in about August I was "kicked out" of my home church youth. This occurred because the church was very small and we had recently gotten a new Pastor. He was a young, new pastor and by the point I left he had destroyed our youth group. Now I will not condemn him or say anything negative about him. Other than we all speak out of anger and even Pastors slip up. They are human too. However, he stood over me and kicked me out saying the only place I was allowed to be was up front in the service of which I was not invited to be in. (I was a leader/teacher for the youth.) At the moment he did that it happened to be the week that my former fiance had called and broken off our engagement. I was completely broken. I remember looking at the skies and with tears streaming down my face telling God that I could not handle anymore. My whole life changed, everything I knew was no longer there for me. I had invested in people who had no intention of investing in me. I also have sinned and had sex before marriage. Now I realize all sin is the same degree in Gods eyes and sin is an even playing field BUT I have never felt more awful. I feel like there is no escaping it. I've confessed my sin to God and I know He has forgiven me. I cannot seem to forgive myself and my broken spirit cannot seem to find healing and restoration. I am struggling to find healing. I am struggling to quit falling to the world with ignorant decisions.

Can someone please help me to heal? I have come to realize that I just cannot do this alone. I desperately need help for my broken spirit. Thank you for your listening ears. God bless.

[dema]

I'm sorry for your loss. I believe God has more concern about the present than the past. God forgets the past. As far as the East is from the West God puts our sins from us.

Having peace to talk to God is the most important part right now.

Learning to listen again to God - he loves you just as you are. Find time to be in his presence.

When we are weak, then he is strong. Let GOD lead you forward.

God still loves you. God always loves you.

[mshumphrey]

Don't be sorry, it is by no means your fault but I appreciate it. I really needed to be refreshed with this today. I believe that not all things are God sent but they are all God USED...which is truly beautiful.

Thank you so much for letting God use you in my life today.


Love in Christ,
Caroline
"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." Ephesians 4:29

[kimby]

I just saw your post today but wanted to respond despite the time gap.

I have a great pastor friend who says something with regularity that I think fits really well here. She talks about the tactics of the enemy. She says that so often he will whisper and suggest and push until we slip up. Once that happens he will then turn his whispers to those of condemnation, telling us how bad we are, how we can't approach God. I have found this pattern she suggests to be pretty accurate. I think it is those final whispers that keep us from forgiving ourselves, keep us from moving on.

I would encourage you to tell the enemy to be silent in Jesus name when those condemning whispers start. I would encourage you to run to God in those moments where you feel the worst about yourself. I know that sounds opposite to what we want to do in those moments, but it is very effective in obliterating the lies we are believing about ourselves and helping us come into agreement with what God says about us...that we are forgiven and loved.

Bless you, my friend!

[Hope]

Hon i just saw this as well. i have been away from the site for awhile... first.... God has a special plan for you. It IS hard when people hurt and disappoint us. I have been learning if i focus on the mountains and the hurt i get stuck in the mire... I will pray for you and please KNOW that the enemy uses every trick at his disposal to bring us down so that we stop leaning on God... as a youth leader there is a forum here thay may benefit from your involvement. I think as adult you have to get permission to get in. If that is where u are called. dont stop dont give in.. i am learning when we are most effective for God is when the enemy strikes... focus on God instead of the mountains... I know it is not so easy as saying it.. but i do believe in my heart that God works wonders.

GBU

[Parcy]

Let patience have her perfect work,... that ye might be whole wanting nothin; never feels itself robbed. I'm sorry to hear about your fiance and the church u were in... Perhaps theres place for another church near by.. or commuted further if the Lord permits. Or even a break from it and realizing the core of why or how u did it might grant you greater feats with the Lord then u expect it...
Alike you i lost something;... i wrote a reply for you but lost the whole context in which scripture were to comfort you with my text written,.. but all things have a new beginning; so i do not mind as long as it is of some worth to you...

I suppose the reason why u can't forgive yourself is that you should, not have ; but should let time run its course for you to realize the entirety of your act commited for your own good; to realize the act is also to find liberation once time has passed and it is found whole and entire within itself. But as you said you feel forgiven by the Lord was supposed the glimps of the initiation of it. You should take it easy on yourself if things dont go as they might; so not to add more stress to yourself..There will be more opputinities to find a spouse and perhaps he wasnt the right one; but im still sorry for the heart ache.... things...life can he harsh sometimes; but im hopeing it will turn out for the better in Christ Jesus amen.