Christianity Oasis Forum

[stillstanding]

God bless your journey ella. im so pleased to call you sister!

Seeing you here and being able to visit with you fills my heart with joy. You truly are a blessing to me!

Persevere in your walk with our Lord because along the way you will bless many and likewise may you be blessed. God loves you immensely!

sing for joy!

much love!

[EllaMay]

Thank you Jamie! And thank you very much standing!
Today wasn't so much fatigue as it was worldly distraction. I really hadn't noticed how much "stuff" is fighting for our attention. Me and my bf are doing a study about taking responsibility for our lives. It made me sad to realize that I am not responsible for my emotions or my actions and am quick to blame others. I know that responsibility is one of those traits that's so easy to see (or not to see) in others, but hard to see the truth when looking in the mirror. I am really needing to spend less time distracted and more time filling up on truth and God's love. I love how this step says to control your thoughts because it correlates nicely with our bible study on responsibility. I need to start controlling my thoughts and taking responsibility for them. I heard somewhere that the chatter in our head isn't really us even though it speaks with our voice. I think many times the devil can introduce thoughts by using our voice and it's our "responsibility" to either get rid of the lie or accept the truth.
Thank you so much for the support,
Ella

[EllaMay]

I'm so excited about the 40 day habit breaking method! I have not even thought about that and it's been such a revelation. I also like the idea of planting good thoughts and habits and to stay clear of anything that takes me away from God. The friend suggestion is tough but last semester I had to ween off of my two very close friends. I love them dearly and I didn't do it because of my boyfriend. I did it because their worldly morals were affecting my Godly ones. They're both really great girls, but until I get a solid base of close Godly friends I think it's best to stay away. Sometimes I wish I had someone else my age going through the same things...who is a girl. Don't get me wrong bf is great and supportive, but as far as emotions and other girl things...well let's just say he doesn't always get it. Both of us have been praying for Godly council and Godly friendships. But I've been praying for years!!!! I know patience is a good thing but I'm seriously done waiting for friends Lord I miss that best friend connection I always hear about! In the meantime I continue weeding and growing my garden, but coffee with a good friend would be really nice too.
Ella

[EllaMay]

So today's step was all about prayer. I hadn't realized that I was praying all wrong up until this point. I always thought it was quantity and I was never really great at praying for long periods of time. I guess that wasn't true. Today I have been very jittery and anxious. I have a nervous habit of picking at my face and I started trying to stop it. It's so hard! I keep touching my face and have to keep reminding myself to stop! It's so hard, but it's the first habit to change in the long long longgg list that I need to get rid of. To make matters worse school work is driving me up the wall with anxiety and if I don't find a release for my anxiety I have no idea what I'm going to do! I think I will start to read Philippians 4:6-9 again like I used to every morning. I hadn't realized that my face picking self mutilation is what was keeping so much anxiety at bay.
Dear Lord please take this anxiety from me. I do not want to fear for anything. Especially trivial things.
Love,
Ella

[Mackenaw]

Hello EllaMay

God bless you this day.

What is it about the school work that causes you anxiety? And, no, I'm not going for the "duh" answer.

Keep your eyes on the goal: what is/was your goal in taking these courses? You just need to get back in touch with the desire and passion you were initially given to run this particular race.

Hebrews 12:1-2 Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. (2) Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Distractions will try to interfere, and some of those distractions will also include your own temporary, carnal desires. Remember, you are a new creation ...a new creature in Christ. Hunker down with God, He is right there with you, and with Him, all things are possible.

Prayers are rising to our Lord in the name of Jesus on your behalf. God's blessed and perfect will be done.

God bless and keep you.
In Christ Jesus' love,
Sister Mack

[EllaMay]

Mack,
Thank you so much for your kind words! I want everything to be perfect so anxiety comes from that mostly. And the money. I'm paying for it all out of pocket so it's been stressful since I didn't want to spend that money. My parents are making me take this semester even though I've said I needed a break and that my worth is not in how long/short it took me to do college or what degree I have. I'm just burnt out and can't find the strength to finish this particular race. The problem is there is no desire hardly any strength either.
But my strength is not my own I know that too. And I should give all my burdens to the Lord which is in fact easier to say than to do.
I like what you have said about temporary carnal desires and distractions. I can definitely relate and it seemed like you put into words exactly what I haven't been able to! Thank you I definitely need to hunker down. For some reason it seems like so much effort and then when I have the time I can't find the words to pray at all! I must be very far from the Lord

Hopefully with the knowledge that I've gained today I can more effectively communicate with the Lord.

Thank you for the prayer and kind words. May His will be done in my life always!
Love,
Ella

[EllaMay]

Step 11- Wow the steps just keep throwing more and more at me! At first I really wanted to sneak a few peaks and start on the next steps as soon as possible. Now I just want to quit and rest a little bit! I'm so close and I feel like I'm behind and that I haven't been doing well at all! I know I have at least gained some knowledge and help I definitely have met a lot of people and am so thankful for the support! I've learned a lot about myself and my mind and a lot about the love of my life and my Lord and Savior. I will know put down this laptop go into a quiet room and come up with an effective miracle grow program between me and God. I will ask him what 40 day habits I should make/break and I will spend some time with the Lord. I may not even be able to say much because I am exhausted, but at least it will be a start.
Ella

[EllaMay]

Step 12- wow I am so close! And drawing so much closer to God. Today I had an amazing time with the Lord just enjoying his presence. I am so blessed and am so thankful for everything he has done for me these past days during this program! It seems like such a slow healing, but it is definitely working! I have learned so much TRUTH and am so excited to finish up these last two days.
It seems like such a no-brainer. Of course we all fall down! But hearing about all the Bible heroes and how they have fallen short but still continue on with God's Grace is very encouraging. So much love!
Ella

[EllaMay]

Step 13- Today is all about love which is just perfect! I've spent all day listening and being in fellowship and while reading the step I just agreed with everything being said. I thought I had such huge huge problems, but when you talk to others you realize that you are not alone! It does feel good to be an ear and the love of God. I tend to talk a lot so sometimes I feel like I don't listen as well as I should. I hope God helps me become a better listener and I pray He gives me the strength to trust Him with my everything!
Ella

[EllaMay]

Last day!!!! Woah I made it 14 days and I feel so so much better! Now I'm considering starting the next course. I don't know it could be a great start!

[Mackenaw]

Hello EllaMay

God bless you this day.

Congratulations on completing the 14 Day CCCC Study.

Remember, to apply the Truth(s) taught in God's Word, and echoed within the study, to your life. And, when and if you find yourself fumbling a little, do not hesitate to re-visit the study or parts of the study again, as a refresher. Since all the principles within the study are based on God's Word, and God's Word is Truth, and Jesus is The Truth and The Truth will set you free, it stands to reason that it is a good thing to do. HALLELUJAH!!! THANK YOU JESUS \o/ \o/ \o/



God bless and keep you, EllaMay.
Love,
Sister Mack

[EllaMay]

Mack,

Thank You I appreciate it! I'm going to go through it a little again just to insure all the information sunk in Thank you for the kind words of encouragement! I didn't realize I would get so much out of it! It's been incredible and such a journey that went by faster than I thought it would.
Time to go read the Bible now
Blessings to you and thank you.
Love,
Ella