Christianity Oasis Forum

[Jane Lee]

So I think I have the biggest garden of dandelions and this whole time I knew they are weeds but oh how pretty they looked to me in my chaotic garden!!

Not only did they look pretty, oh how amusing and fun they are when you take a deep breath to blow off the seeds on them!!  Seeing those seeds dancing in the wind also seemed pretty to my eyes. But  I just realized that doing so only multiplies their numbers and I am sowing bad seeds all around.

 

That has been my keyword this whole day. Right now its more like *doh* and a lot of forehead slapping...but apparently not enough.

Today is the day that coincided with my stepping stone 2. Renewing of the mind and spirit...the soul. The soul can control my spirit and I want to make a conscious effort to control my mind.  The question of who am i was again answered...child of God! And then it seemed so simple but true and should have therefore been a moment of epiphany. But it wasn't. To be honest, I have a lot of renewing to do because that should've knocked me to my knees in tears...but it didnt.

It got lost in translation because I am still trying to translate that into my life. It was a trying day today. That peace I felt the other night was stripped away again and I had nothing but chaos in my mind and so i felt nothing but anxiety all day and night. So physically my stomach is still knotted and shoulders tense and sore.

I am lingering on the phrase "you cannot change who are meant to be" no matter what you do. I was telling my sister today that I just want to start over...this life i call my own seems to give me a lot of unnecessary pain. I want to run far away and just start new. That wont change anything though because i will still be me...just in a different location. I need to work on me...

I keep wanting God to turn his face towards me to give me an ever so radiant smile that will light up my world. Yet as I read today...miracles aren't always instantaneous.  

Thank you everyone for your comments and encouragement.

Just realized...God has been trying to smitten me with His smiles through each of your kind words.
Thank you for letting me end my day with your loving words.
It will take lots of weeding for me to shed that light unto my darkness so there will be no more darkness. 

Curious to see my garden without the dandelions in the light.

[lyl1114]

May God continue to shine His face upon us!

[Upward]

“Salvation is not some felicitous state to which we can lift ourselves by our own bootstraps after the contemplation of sufficiently good examples.

It is an utterly new creation into which we are brought by our death in Jesus' death and our resurrection in his.

It comes not out of our own best efforts, however well-inspired or successfully pursued, but out of the shipwreck of all human efforts whatsoever.”

“The Christian life is not by effort, and not by struggle; not merely by trying to put into practice certain maxims, or by trying to attain to a certain measure; but from beginning to end, and all together, it is a matter of knowing the Lord Jesus within.”

God bless you, i appreciate your sharing your heart and walk.Much encouragment to you