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Stuck on forgiveness

Postby dabs316 » Mon Oct 25, 2010 4:36 pm

Still on #4. I have and am working on many aspects of forgiveness. I am especially watching how I judge others. I am realizing that has been the route where all the feelings that eventually culminate in bitterness comes from.

I was thinking about a friend I had as a teenager. We were best friends. We each had a child four months apart. I have son. She has a daughter. They are both grown. Jealousy got into my heart. I was always coveting the things she did for her daughter: piano lessons, horseback riding, violin, yada, yada. Of course, when I compare either myself or my family, for some reason I am always on the losing end. Through my bitterness, I used to make catty remarks and eventually we just parted ways. I was thinking of getting together to ask for forgiveness and possibly renew the relationship. However, the rub is as I contemplate this, I am picturing talking about my son and her daughter. My son is 25. He graduated college with a degree in media and film. Because that is a selective degree and the way the job market is and because he has anxiety issues (passed on by me) as well, he can't seem to get a job, and is still living home. I'm not sure how to handle that. I don't want the bad feelings to come spilling over again. I can see that as I think these negative things that is what I can expect. How do I handle these jeolous thoughts as they are in the process of happening?

Also, as I was typing a hospital report today it concerned a young woman who had to be on antibiotics. Her mother said cost wasn't an issue. Then it was said that the young woman didn't know why her medical assistance was cut off, but she was sure she could get it back. In my mind almost subconsciously I judged her to be "on the dole". I'm glad I recognized it. I reasoned with myself, that the young woman needed the medicine and she didn't have the resources. It happens. There are people in my own family, that have been on medical assistance and are "on the dole" so to speak. I realize how critical and judgmental that is. I give it up to God, ask for forgiveness and forgive as He forgave me. I hope I mean it. I believe I do.

The situation with my friend is different. It's personal. I don't want to feel that way. Maybe I should wait until I'm further along on the road of forgiveness for that challenge. It's not that I haven't forgiven her (not that she needs to be, it's more me), but I don't want to ignite new feelings. I don't trust myself yet.
Therefore if any man be in Christ he is a new creature; old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2Cor5:17
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Postby mlg » Mon Oct 25, 2010 8:58 pm

The jealousy bug! I've been there done that one a few times myself...later in the study...you will find a chart that will help you to renew your mind...but for now I'll let you know that it says to counteract jealousy with courage...so this is how you get past the jealousy...look at who you are and be strong in knowing that you are and you have just what God wants for you...nothing more and nothing less...and find peace in knowing He has the best for you planned at all times.

luv ya
Do you know my Jesus? Do you know my friend? Have you heard He loves you? If not, I'd like to introduce you.
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Postby Mackenaw » Tue Oct 26, 2010 2:27 am

Hello Dabs *hug*

God bless you this day.

I know you have said you are stuck on the "Forgiveness" Stone #4 in the 14-Day Path Counseling Study, but what are you doing each and every day in order to reconnect with The Holy Spirit, in reading The Word of God, and renewal of your mind?

Romans 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing or your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Titus 3:5-6 Not by works of righteousness when we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of The Holy Ghost; (6) Which He shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Saviour.

Remember, Spiritual renewal is at least a daily necessity, if not hour by hour, in the beginning, until we stop totally defaulting to the self/carnal. The natural/carnal/fleshly side of us is ornery!!! So we need to keep reaching for God, and die to are carnal man/woman/self, and walk in our spirit man/woman/self.

Remember, the Apostle Paul said "...I die daily."

He also said: II Corinthians 4:16 For which cause we faint not; but though our outward (natural/carnal/flesh) man perish (is dying), yet the inward (spiritual man) is renewed day by day.

Our relationship with God needs our commitment, time and care, as with any real relationship. The Word of God is food/fuel to our soul.

I encourage you to continue on the Path, and do the next steps. You can always revisit the "Forgiveness" Step, as you can do with all of them.

Dabs, it's obvious that The Holy Spirit is reminding you of godly principles -- even today's example with the woman, when you recognized that a judging spirit was tempting you. He wants you to continue in your pursuit and seeking of Him. He loves you, Dabs. The Lord God Almighty loves Dabs.

There is also a library of shorter Studies on this site, too. Each of the studies is Holy Spirit inspired and include Bible scriptures. Here is the link: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keywor ... tudies.htm

I'm praying for you, Dabs. God's blessed will be done.

God bless and keep you.
Love,
Mack
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Postby havingfaithagain53 » Tue Oct 26, 2010 2:58 am

*Wave* Hello Dabs,

I agree about don't get stuck on one stepping stone... it can cause you to stop learning the things that will make you stronger each day.

I've always said this to myself and to many people who ask my advice on things... so I will give you the same. Our Lord is NOT the Father of DOUBT or of FEAR. So, if you have either one or both... DON'T do anything until you have those out of your heart. Trust me, some people say that we will always have those 2 in our lives... well... they don't know the GOD I do, and they don't believe HIS WORD either! :) If GOD says we don't have to have them in our lives... I BELIEVE HIM!!! :)

It doesn't mean that satan won't throw them at us... for sure that will happen daily on one thing or another. But, like you did with the woman at your job, you immediately said in your spirit 'I'm judging' and ask the Lord to take that thought out. Well, that's exactly what you have to do with these 2 trouble makers... :) And any other things that are negative thoughts!

I'm trusting that because you LOVE THE LORD as you do... that He will see you though ALL of this. Don't sit and dwell on what you should or shouldn't do right now... you need to just RENEW your SPIRIT and it will all fall in place at exactly the right time. GOD'S TIMING IS ALWAYS PERFECT!!! So just put it in HIS HANDS and He will tell you when it is time to do what you need to do.

Keep following the program and you will see what all of us are talking about! :) It's totally amazing how your eyes will be open to things you can't believe. You already ARE seeing benefits from just the 4 steps already if your speaking to the Holy Spirit in the middle of a conversation at work.. lol That's how we know we are DOING the RIGHT thing.. when the HOLY SPIRIT whispers to you that you did something wrong and then you STOP and say... oops YOUR RIGHT! :)

Don't be hard on yourself.. trust me I DO KNOW all about that! Just remember that JESUS LOVES YOU AND DIED FOR YOU ... NOT FOR YOU TO BE MISERABLE ALL THE TIME... BUT TO BE JOYFUL! Satan is the one constantly reminding us of all the bad things we have done.. NOT GOD! So... forget the past and look to the future! That's where all your answers will be anyway. :)

Praying for you & believing in GOD'S WONDERFUL GRACE to see you through to the NEXT GREAT STEP in your life!

Love in Christ,
Linda
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I am seeing change but

Postby dabs316 » Tue Oct 26, 2010 7:44 am

I AM plucking the weeds from my conscious mind, but now I have gotten to a place that I am afraid is a stronghold. This came to light mostly last night although I have had glimpses of it before, just couldn't name it. After the Bible study (where wonderful things are taking place), I came home. Then I glimpsed in my mind this wonderful woman (Sadie) and I catch myself putting words into her mind of judgments against me, such as: "You are a bother." It's like I enter her thoughts and they are against me. But I found that I did that with each person I had a contact with. I rewinded the interaction in my mind and distorted what happened. I'll have an image of that person and I put words to their mouths of some condemnation or judgment against myself. It's weird.

Where is this coming from? I am onto the frontal attacks of satan. I am plucking weeds and replacing with God's seeds. Yet this is a new revelation to me. I am so sorry for myself that I place that kind of judgment and condemnation upon me. It's cruel. I need to break that bondage. I have been playing "Who I am in Christ" scriptures from my recorder over and over, but I think the scenarios I play unconsciously in my mind have been making the TRUTH of who I am in Christ harder to hear and receive in my spirit.

But I am glad that this revelation is being made known to me. Before I was unaware. But it leaves me trembling from the cruelty against myself. I know God loves me, but I want to know it my spirit, that there is now no condemnation in Christ Jesus. I want to be free of this. I want the doubt and fear out.

I will go on with the next stone today as well as with "Renewing my Mind" chart I'm going to make up today. I am not turning back. It's painful. But I'm moving through this and beyond until I truly can claim "with all my heart" that Jesus loves me and I am complete in Him. No condemnation. No fear of being judged.
Therefore if any man be in Christ he is a new creature; old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2Cor5:17
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Postby mlg » Tue Oct 26, 2010 10:06 pm

dabs...the condemnation you have for yourself...seems to make me wonder if you still hold some unforgiveness towards yourself. Often we think that others are saying or thinking negative things about us...when our own thoughts towards ourself are negative...so we think that no one can think any different of us. If you get a moment...search back towards the back of your garden and see if there are some weeds hidden deep past the new seedlings you have been planting.

luv ya
Do you know my Jesus? Do you know my friend? Have you heard He loves you? If not, I'd like to introduce you.
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stuck on forgiveness

Postby sarrah bailey » Tue Oct 26, 2010 10:34 pm

*saint* you are still a saint so i say look back remimber.. compare? you despair...so now go forward press toward Jesus ask for his help as often as it takes ask for his help he is absolutely "all in this together "with you he will help get that wild cat outta you keep hope alive keep the word of God in your eyes. Love my friend *laughter* we fall down but we get up a saint is just a sinner who fell down, but then got up...just keep getting back up again. sister :P
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Blessed

Postby dabs316 » Wed Oct 27, 2010 6:11 am

I don't want this day to go by without you all knowing how blessed and thankful I am to have you here. God is working in such a powerful way as I am learning new truths and storing them in my heart. Thank you for allowing God to flow through you to me. I especially want to thank whoever God used to put together this website and the counseling path and all of the teachings. You don't know how much you have helped me. May God's blessings abound and many more souls be set free in Christ! Amen.
Therefore if any man be in Christ he is a new creature; old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2Cor5:17
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