Christianity Oasis Forum

[Guest]

So I've never actually told my entire testimony...and don't know if I will even get to all of it this time.

I've was raised in church my whole life. I've been in and out of church as well. Not really having a relationship, a true relationship with God. But only knowing that it was the right thing to do. I have struggled with being angry at God for the things that have come in my life. I have since learned that it doesn't help (at all), and it is just a tool that Satan uses to pull God's chosen away. I am just now realizing the true relationship that God wants and deserves.

ok now to really start.
My dad left when I was little. I still to this day struggle with this. Wanting to find him and tell him I forgive him. But I know if I do my family would disown me for the things he did.

My mom was sick for many years, I was very angry at God, why did he allow such pain and suffering. My mom died soon after I was married. I later found out that she had asked God to live long enough so that she could see her children get married. Talk about Satan using that as a tool for guilt. I also married someone that none of my family liked and certainly didn't approve of. Of course he wasn't a christian, but he told me he believed in God(I later found out he lied and he was an atheist) --and of course this was the time in my life when I wasn't going to church and I was angry with God and wanting things my way. (FYI --when you want something that doesn't line up with God it isn't worth it---AT ALL)
Well, nearly 4 years of fighting HELL in my house, my then husband told me to choose between God and Atheism. During this time I grew closer and stronger to God and was able to take a stand for God. Something I never thought I would have the strength to do (however it is in this time that it wasn't my strength but God's) So he left. I became alone, a single mother, no job, no home, absolutely nothing. If it wasn't for God and my family I wouldn't be here today. I feel completely blessed in that area. God has provided so much.

I decided to look for someone to fill the emptiness and loneliness. That only led to more struggles with Satan almost winning. I had to come to the place where it wasn't worth it; nothing this life has to offer is worth loosing out on God and on Heaven. So I have chosen to wait on God until that right person comes, if he does come; but even if he doesn't my relationship with God is more important and it is Him that my focus should truly be on.

I still struggle with loneliness, bitterness, guilt, emptiness, depression, and much more. But I know where my strength lies and continue to place my trust in God that he will supply my need and He will fill me with His love, mercy, and grace; and that I will find that peace, joy, and life again in Him.

God has really dealt with me and has given me once last chance to serve Him. I can't play the religious game I played; and that so many play today. I know that God is real and he has delivered me out of many situations and helped me climb up mountain tops, and has carried me through the valleys, even when I felt all alone. I am nothing without Him.
I continue to struggle and overcome as everyone does. I just hope and pray that I will set a good example for my child. That he will serve God with all his heart and will not stumble and fall as I have.

Again, I know that this is just a glimpse and I really didn't get into all the struggles and trials that I have faced. Maybe in time it will come. But for now I hope that this helps someone that is struggling.

God Bless

[xxJILLxx]

Hello Psalms,


I dont think we have met and i would like to welcome you to Oasis. If you need anything dont hesitate to ask any of us.

Im sorry for what you have went through and i will definately keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I know being a single mom is not easy, i am a single mom of 3 myself and i know the many struggles.

You mentioned that you still struggle in some areas and i would like to encourage you to work those out with Him. We have a wonderful counseling program here that will be able to help you heal in these areas and come closer to our King. Heres the link if you are interested. I have benefitted so much from the counseling steps myself.

http://www.christianityoasis.com/CCCC/Forum.htm


If u ever need to talk or just need support being a single mom i am here, feel free to pm me amytime.

Gbu
♥Jill

[lizzie]

sister Psalms

I just wanted to let you know how truly blessed I was by your testimony today.

Thank you for sharing your story with us... but this is not the end sister

God has so much more in store for you, and armed with the precious lessons you have learned, you will be able go forth into that future and help others who are where you used to be.

You have become a powerful tool for the Lord

God bless u psalms
If you ever need to talk, I am but a PM away.

[Lani]

Hey Psalms,

I pray you are well sis! It has been a while since we spoke.

I just want to say thanks for posting this, for sharing with us.

The feelings of

loneliness, bitterness, guilt, emptiness, depression, and much more.

are an attempt to make you loose focus on His love and grace. Awesome that you are leaning on Him to see you through!

You are NOT alone, if it ever feels as such, please reach out and talk... there are many here willing to listen and pray.



Hope to see you soon!!!

Prayers remain with you and your son!

Peace and Luv in Christ,

Lani