Christianity Oasis Forum

[goofy371]

Hey!
I have been dealing with very serious problem for some time. Quite a long time. It is very hard for me to talk about it... I am struggling with suicidal thoughts and not only thoughts... Even the last two days was fine, the silent voice telling to leave this world did not go away.
And when people tries to encourage me and talk about the great God's love, it is killing me. I feel unbearable pain hearing God's name and the funniest is that I am leading the youth in our church...crazy...I am telling them that I don't believe in now, but I know that every word I say is truth, even I don't feel like that... It is good we have summer holidays.
I know the truth, I wish I could praise the Lord, but I can not anymore...only pain...I feel as I don't have strength anymore...

[storm]

look deep inside your heart....

we all have times when we are desperate and just cant see any light to follow.....
spend some time talking to god.....tell him your feelings and thoghts.....

you are a child of God and Jesus loves you

take one day at a time ....sometimes one minute at a time


God is good

and loves you

storm

[mlg]

hello goofy371 Welcome to the Oasis.

There are times that we fall away from the Lord's presence. Those times are the lonliest and hardest times. The thing is that Satan wants to keep you there. Satan doesn't want you getting up again. We have to fight the good fight. We can't let Satan be the victor. We have been given the Power over Satan, to trod upon his head. Don't give up, goofy371.

You state that you are a youth minister. One thing about that is that you are doing God's work, and this is why you face such harsh trials. See the more we do for God, the more Satan fights us and wants us to quit working for God.

Now may I offer this to you, God wants you to have life. He wants you to be happy. God loves you, and He is there to listen. Tell God what you are going through, He already knows, so share it with HIM. Saying it outload, will help you heal inside.

I hope you will continue on your journey of not giving up. You have made the first step, by just coming here and sharing what's on your mind.

I want to invite you to the chatrooms here. There are many who are willing to listen, and share with you.

My prayers are with you, if you need someone to talk to send me a private message or post something else here.

Take care and God Bless

[---]

The fact that you are being tried so much right now means that God must have awesome plans for you. We all have our extreme hard days, months, years. I have been in your situation with your thoughts, and though you don't see the hope yet, it is there. Everyday, every hour look for it. Pray for it. Only God can fight off Satan who is trying so hard to keep you down.
DON"T give up. Stay around positive things. Stay around encouraging people. The Oasis is an awesome place for that if you don't have people you can be around right now.
You are in my prayers.

Pearl

[goofy371]

[lizzie]

When I feel down, I remember this scripture

Psalm 30: 5 weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

For some of us that night may be longer than others, but we place our hope in Him, knowing that He hears our cries and the Bible tells us that He never gives us more than we can bear and will provide a way thru it.

And remember also, that many times the burdens we try to carry ourselves, are way beyond our strength. But yet we keep struggling to find a way to carry them alone. Jesus tells us to give them to Him and He will take them from us.

Being a Christian who is actively serving God does not mean we will not be attacked by the enemy. In fact, it seems every time we try to do His will we get attacked harder. Coincidence? Hardly. See satan wants to discourage you, make you feel unworthy of serving God, and he wants you to just give up.

But my friend, God chose you. And He knows all our strengths and all our weaknesses, and He knows what you feel within. And He loves you no less cuz of it. He understands and He feels when you hurt.

Dont let the enemy keep you from what God has in store for you. You keep fighting and resisting and keep your eyes on Jesus.

Psalms 55:22 Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.

You arent alone, dont let satan make you think you are. You have Jesus and the body of Christ, of which you are a precious part, to lean on for encouragement and support.

God bless you

lizzie

[mlg]

Goofy371 you are loved.

[goofy371]

I was crying to God days and nights, telling how I feel, asking for help, but now I can not. i don't pray anymore, I don't read Bible anymore, I don't go to church anymore, I have left all the ministries I have been in except youth. I tried to leave it too, but could not.Even if I stayed home I was thinking of it all the time.
sometimes i can pray for someone else but not for myself. sometimes I feel I am gained all that pain.
After the church or reading the Bible it gets worse. I come back home and start shaking, crying, can not control my emotions, it is hard to brief, just deep pain and it goes on for several hours. the same happens if I want to talk to someone face to face, I am not able to speak, even if I wish and after i feel worse again. And it was the same when I tried to meet counselor and after she phoned me and said she doesn't want to meet with me anymore, she said she was not the right person. I feel so guilty about what is going on, but i can not do anything about that, I wish I could.
Talking about believe and knowledge...
I am confused... some people says that I am well educated in theology, but I have never believed in my heart..that I am not Christian at all. Then I don't know what means to believe in God!!! my desire always was to live for Him.We walked together before. I don't know what happened and why? I can not deny Him, even I tried. I can not live without Him, but now I feel I can not live with Him. About a year my only prayer was "Help me to stay faithful to You"

[foreverHis]

goofy? even tho you are mixed up about your belief in God..or your non belief..He is always there..He has not moved...if you want an everlasting life with God then you have to make up your mind to have a relationship again with Him...push thru all the rubble .. thru all your feelings....greater is He that is in you ,than he that is in the world..it's all on your will now...want do you want? yes we are here for you..God is here for you..but you have to want to push thru and go on...you have everything in Him..there is nothing outside of Him for you...yes, we all have these times my friend...but c'mon you are an overcomer in Him...we would love to talk to you more ,,come into chat sometime....you are loved..and God is missing one of His kids..God bless you my friend

[mlg]

Goofy371, all this mixed up confusion. It's not easy trying to sort it all out. You can't live with God, you can't live without God, you don't know who to turn to, you don't know how to turn to someone. It's all really garbled when you sit back and take a look at the big picture. You need to begin breaking things into smaller portions, and dealing with one thing at a time. Right now you just want everything to be better, but what really needs to happen, is that one part of you becomes better at a time. It's healing of the soul, sorta like healing of a wound. First the wound bleeds, then it scabs over, then after several days it will heal over with a fresh set of skin. It doesn't happen all at once though, it's a daily thing, and takes many days to heal, sometimes weeks according to the wound. Our souls can be the same way, they can get damaged somehow, someway with all that we are going through in life, and then when we want them to begin to heal, we want them healed immediately. It takes time, and it takes patience. Don't worry, God is good all the time, one step at a time.

Praying for you.

luv ya