Christianity Oasis Forum
4 posts
† Page 1 of 1
Step 13 :-/
Today's topic made me feel some kind of way... not really sure how to describe it.
The topic of discussion has been one of contention with me for a while, if I'm going to be totally honest. I spent a lot of time (and money ) on other people, but it largely goes unreturned. Now, I don't mention this to have a "tit-for-tat" attitude, but I mention it because there is a huge incongruity! If we follow the verse in today's reading Romans 12:10 which says "Show kind affection to one another with brotherly love, in honor, putting others above yourself." then why is it that there seems to be some unspoken rule that this applies to everybody but me? I can honestly say that there are very few people I can depend on when I need help, as evidenced last year when I had a car accident. I was without a car for a while and nobody helped me get through it. Nobody offered to give me rides, and when I asked they were unable. Nobody was there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on. Nobody helped me with anything, not even family. I didn't ask for money or for anything unreasonable. I reached out and was rejected at every turn, at a very down time in my life.
This isn't the only time I've been rejected when I reach out to people, but it's the most difficult. I really had a hard time with this, and I don't know what the lesson to be learned from that situation is.
Nonetheless, I haven't stopped helping people or being there for people. I know it's more blessed to give than to recieve, and I really do feel good when I'm helping others and doing something for a person in need. But I will admit that for the most part I've stopped asking for help and support from friends and especially family. Maybe the lesson in this is that I shouldn't ask people for help, I should solve my own problems...? I dunno, just guessing.
The topic of discussion has been one of contention with me for a while, if I'm going to be totally honest. I spent a lot of time (and money ) on other people, but it largely goes unreturned. Now, I don't mention this to have a "tit-for-tat" attitude, but I mention it because there is a huge incongruity! If we follow the verse in today's reading Romans 12:10 which says "Show kind affection to one another with brotherly love, in honor, putting others above yourself." then why is it that there seems to be some unspoken rule that this applies to everybody but me? I can honestly say that there are very few people I can depend on when I need help, as evidenced last year when I had a car accident. I was without a car for a while and nobody helped me get through it. Nobody offered to give me rides, and when I asked they were unable. Nobody was there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on. Nobody helped me with anything, not even family. I didn't ask for money or for anything unreasonable. I reached out and was rejected at every turn, at a very down time in my life.
This isn't the only time I've been rejected when I reach out to people, but it's the most difficult. I really had a hard time with this, and I don't know what the lesson to be learned from that situation is.
Nonetheless, I haven't stopped helping people or being there for people. I know it's more blessed to give than to recieve, and I really do feel good when I'm helping others and doing something for a person in need. But I will admit that for the most part I've stopped asking for help and support from friends and especially family. Maybe the lesson in this is that I shouldn't ask people for help, I should solve my own problems...? I dunno, just guessing.
I may have wisdom, and knowledge on Earth
but if I speak wrong, then what is it worth?
See, what we now know is NOTHING compared
to the love that was shown when our lives were spared!
but if I speak wrong, then what is it worth?
See, what we now know is NOTHING compared
to the love that was shown when our lives were spared!
-
Pert - Posts: 64
- Location: Ohio
- Marital Status: Single
Re: Step 13 :-/
Hello Pert (((hugs)))
God bless you this day.
I do love your honesty. I hope you'll love mine, equally
Perhaps those you asked, were not Christians, or perhaps they were Christians and they had not yet grown in the knowledge, grace and love of God and His Word, the way you are growing right now.
There are also times, when we did receive help or assistance, but, because it was not in the form that we imagined or expected, we didn't even realize that we had been blessed.
I know many Christians, whom love The Lord, yet they pout and get offended because no one from their church comes to visit them, or call them to see how they are, yet in God's Word it tells us that those that are sick should call for the elders. James 5:14 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.
I can appreciate and understand that you had a difficult challenge to overcome and endure, but, Pert, you did overcome and endure it, and that was with God watching over you and providing for you. Perhaps not the way you wanted, but...
This life is not easy, and it has so many trials, tribulations and challenges. I know that some people seem to have an easier life than others, but there are plenty that have it worse than we do... worse than most of us can ever imagine. But, isn't it curious that we only compare our life to those that we think have it better than us?
Dema, a member on this site, has a on-going thread in the Called Christians Forum, entitled "Dema's Devotions". On August 6th she posted a wonderful message, that really cuts to the core of a lot of our misunderstandings in this walk with Christ Jesus. Here is the link to her post: viewtopic.php?f=157&t=23637&start=48
Then, on the same day, August 6th, Dema replied to another post, in another Forum (I can't remember the Forum), but here is the link: viewtopic.php?f=32&t=26014&p=141289#p141289
Again, this message addresses a core problem in some of our misunderstandings of this life. I hope you'll check out both of her posts on August 6th, via the links provided, above.
When I first read Dema's posts, I got that Ding, Ding, Ding in my heart. (That's what I say to describe that feeling when The Holy Spirit bears witness with my spirit. Afterwards, a thought entered into my mind -- a thought of His blessed Word... Luke 16:10 He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.
Gratitude goes a long way in our faith walk with Christ. While I am not suggesting anyone change the wording of the above scripture -- no, no, never, never... it is perfect, blessed, beautiful and holy as written -- I do think the same principle could be said and applied to gratitude or ingratitude. Are we grateful to The Lord for everything we have? even for the small things? grateful, even for our ability and heart to do for others?
I John 4:19 19 We love Him, because he first loved us.
We cannot love or do anything good, that He didn't first give us the ability to do so.
Oh, and check out the blessed message that Jesus shared in Luke 14:12-14.
Pert, you are growing, and you are embracing this study and the Word of God. You have many questions, and you are being upfront and honest. I so appreciate that, and so does God. If you will continue to seek Him with your whole heart, the Truth will continue to unfold and be revealed to you. And that, my dear, is truly a beautiful blessing.
God bless and keep you, Pert.
Love,
Mack
God bless you this day.
I do love your honesty. I hope you'll love mine, equally
Perhaps those you asked, were not Christians, or perhaps they were Christians and they had not yet grown in the knowledge, grace and love of God and His Word, the way you are growing right now.
There are also times, when we did receive help or assistance, but, because it was not in the form that we imagined or expected, we didn't even realize that we had been blessed.
I know many Christians, whom love The Lord, yet they pout and get offended because no one from their church comes to visit them, or call them to see how they are, yet in God's Word it tells us that those that are sick should call for the elders. James 5:14 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.
I can appreciate and understand that you had a difficult challenge to overcome and endure, but, Pert, you did overcome and endure it, and that was with God watching over you and providing for you. Perhaps not the way you wanted, but...
This life is not easy, and it has so many trials, tribulations and challenges. I know that some people seem to have an easier life than others, but there are plenty that have it worse than we do... worse than most of us can ever imagine. But, isn't it curious that we only compare our life to those that we think have it better than us?
Dema, a member on this site, has a on-going thread in the Called Christians Forum, entitled "Dema's Devotions". On August 6th she posted a wonderful message, that really cuts to the core of a lot of our misunderstandings in this walk with Christ Jesus. Here is the link to her post: viewtopic.php?f=157&t=23637&start=48
Then, on the same day, August 6th, Dema replied to another post, in another Forum (I can't remember the Forum), but here is the link: viewtopic.php?f=32&t=26014&p=141289#p141289
Again, this message addresses a core problem in some of our misunderstandings of this life. I hope you'll check out both of her posts on August 6th, via the links provided, above.
When I first read Dema's posts, I got that Ding, Ding, Ding in my heart. (That's what I say to describe that feeling when The Holy Spirit bears witness with my spirit. Afterwards, a thought entered into my mind -- a thought of His blessed Word... Luke 16:10 He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.
Gratitude goes a long way in our faith walk with Christ. While I am not suggesting anyone change the wording of the above scripture -- no, no, never, never... it is perfect, blessed, beautiful and holy as written -- I do think the same principle could be said and applied to gratitude or ingratitude. Are we grateful to The Lord for everything we have? even for the small things? grateful, even for our ability and heart to do for others?
I John 4:19 19 We love Him, because he first loved us.
We cannot love or do anything good, that He didn't first give us the ability to do so.
Oh, and check out the blessed message that Jesus shared in Luke 14:12-14.
Pert, you are growing, and you are embracing this study and the Word of God. You have many questions, and you are being upfront and honest. I so appreciate that, and so does God. If you will continue to seek Him with your whole heart, the Truth will continue to unfold and be revealed to you. And that, my dear, is truly a beautiful blessing.
God bless and keep you, Pert.
Love,
Mack
-
Mackenaw - Posts: 2414
- Location: NY
- Marital Status: Married
Re: Step 13 :-/
I do appreciate your honesty, and I appreciate all the wonderful help you've been giving me along on this journey. I am far from an expert. I will never claim to be one. I'm just a flawed, probably crazy person trying to live the best life I can for the Lord. I'm still learning. I don't plan to ever stop. And I realize now that even though nobody ever says "Thank You" to me, it doesn't mean that I should stop doing good things for other people, or that it goes unnoticed. I have prayed that the people I help out stop taking advantage of me. Is that a wrong thing to pray for?
Last edited by Pert on Wed Aug 08, 2012 11:57 am, edited 1 time in total.
I may have wisdom, and knowledge on Earth
but if I speak wrong, then what is it worth?
See, what we now know is NOTHING compared
to the love that was shown when our lives were spared!
but if I speak wrong, then what is it worth?
See, what we now know is NOTHING compared
to the love that was shown when our lives were spared!
-
Pert - Posts: 64
- Location: Ohio
- Marital Status: Single
Re: Step 13 :-/
I also did not mean to imply that I'm not thankful to God for everything He's done to me. You have no idea how much I praised God for helping me through that situation, but not just that, for EVERYTHING He does for me1 I thank Him for helping me through the situation I'm going through now, because I already know that it will in due time be over. I thank Him for the patience He's given me over the years-- at a time when I was younger, if I was treated how I've been treated lately, I would have just gone off on everyone and walked away. I thank God I don't have to be that angry person anymore. I thank God that I have Him to depend on, even when I have noone else I still have God. I thank God that, even though I don't have much, I'm able to help people who really need it, BUT I have lately been asking Him for the wisdom to know when a person asks me for help or for money or whatever it may be, that He allow me to know if I'm being taken advantage of or if the person has genuine motives. I've been taken advantage of a lot, and I have a hard time rejoicing in that.
I may have wisdom, and knowledge on Earth
but if I speak wrong, then what is it worth?
See, what we now know is NOTHING compared
to the love that was shown when our lives were spared!
but if I speak wrong, then what is it worth?
See, what we now know is NOTHING compared
to the love that was shown when our lives were spared!
-
Pert - Posts: 64
- Location: Ohio
- Marital Status: Single
4 posts
† Page 1 of 1
Return to C-O-O-L Christian Counseling Journals
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 329 guests