Christianity Oasis Forum

[mercedes12]

"forgive and forget" i never really understood this quote because ive been hurt so many times i forgive people but never forget. Im not a person who likes revenge..i may be angry for a while but then i let it go.. The problem i have is with some people i forgive them because i know they make mistakes and i still let them in my life but i still have in back of my mind what theyve done so im more careful which makes me not trust any one. At first i can be cold towards someone who hurts me and distant because im scared to be hurt again but then after a while im the same with them (sweet,loyal and giving) and even though i still remember what they done to me it does not make me change the way i treat them , its just still within mey mind. As for other people especially in my family ive been hurt and i still forgive them so i can move on but i dont want certain family members and friends in my life...is that wrong???...I have an adopted brother and i guess as he grew older he has a lot of built in anger, ive always understood his feelings but as im getting older he steals my things, talks bad to others about me, brakes my things with out me looking and sometimes i feel like he is jealous of me. I dont want him to feel that way and just because he does this to me i dont want to do it to him. We were so close but now distant, i love him andhopeeverything is well for him but im sick of making excuses for him and others to hurt me so thats why i dont let certain people stay in my life..is that wrong?

[1st Timothy 4:12]

God has told us to forgive, but He didn't say we have to forget. He wants us to distance ourselves from those who negatively influence us. It is okay to distance yourself. You are not wrong. Your brother is probably hurting, and he might want attetnion. Maybe this is the only way for him to gain it. I want you to pray about this. Jesus will answer with time.
I hope this helps. PM me if you need anything!

[Pert]

I understand where you're coming from. I can forgive, but I never forget. I don't know, but I think for me it's a defense mechanism so I don't allow myself to get hurt again.

[ServeGod]

Sounds like your on the right path on forgiving and not revenging and letting things go. Thats awesome. Forgiving is giving it to our Lord, only he knows the hearts and minds of men and only God is our Judge. Trusting. Yes I have been hurt many times myself, and i eventually figured out why I was getting hurt.
When we befriend the people of the world, wheather we like it or not they come with fruits not like ours. Eventually you will get hurt, no matter how nice they seem, their nature and fruits will eventually surface with us getting hurt.
Today, I am friends with all people, no enemies, but I am careful with who i befriend. I Have very little close friends, but the ones that I do have are christians, i know their fruits and I know their love.
Galatians 5: 16-26