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Is it Sin?
My dear brothers and sisters,
I was "trapped" in bondage to cybersex for years, and I still am fighting the daily battle to overcome ... believe me I know every argument. I told myself:
"It's better to "make believe" adultery than to do it in real life... "
"It's not REALLY fornication..."
"It's SAFE SEX without risk of pregnancy or disease..."
"And besides, there is always the knowledge of God's grace... and I know that nothing can separate me from the love of God....
On and on my mind would go.. grasping at ways to make it right... to make me stop despising myself... to quiet the convicting voice of the Holy Spirit.
I would cry out to God for help and then drink so that I couldn't hear His answer. Guess who I went whining to for help? People with the same problem.. so you can imagine where that got me.
I know there are some of you still struggling with the issue of whether or not this is sin, especially if you are unmarried. God wants to see his precious children set free. He loves us all so very much. He's put it on my heart to look into the question and bring it forward here for that purpose.
Jesus himself said, You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not commit adultery. But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:27-29
That addresses the issue of LOOKING, perhaps that would cover viewing pornography and webcam cybering... does that include just TALKING?
Jesus called the crowd to him and said, "Listen and understand. What goes into a man's mouth does not make him 'unclean,' but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him 'unclean.' " Matthew 15:10-12
Do we really need to talk about how important our words are? Jesus is called THE WORD. God spake the whole world into being with His WORD.
We have forgiveness for our sins because Jesus died on the cross to pay the price we owed. We also have the indwelling Holy Spirit empowering us to say NO to temptations. We have been justified in Christ, and we're being sanctified.
It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 1 Thes 4:2-4
I know that some of you are asking yourself, "If we know we're going to be forgiven, then why fight the battle? After all, nobody can live up to God's standards of holiness; why bother to try? It's hopeless. I've tried. I failed. I give up."
It matters because you are suffering with shame and guilt; because your testimony to the power of God to set you free isn't in evidence; and because you are wasting valuable time that could be spent serving God. But the main reason it matters is because it minimizes the cross and the sacrifice that Jesus went through to give you the GRACE to say NO when you don't say it! Do you love God enough to make a sacrifice for him?
If you are struggling with sexual immorality in your mind... even if it stays there in your mind and you don't cyber, don't look at porn, and don't talk about sex to others; you still have sin in your heart and you must cry out to God desperately with your need.
We have this passage of scripture to guide us in overcoming:
Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. James 4:7-10
Let's break it down step by step....
Therefore submit to God. (Cry out to Him that you can't do this and are dependent on his mercy and grace)
Resist the devil and he will flee from you. (Say NO! Be willing to take whatever steps necessary to resist. Maybe you need to put a filter on your internet; delete messenger; block certain people; find an accountability partner or join a support group.)
Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. (There is NO substitute for reading or listening to the Word of God. Make it your top priority; consider getting Bible on CD and listening in your car as you drive; spend time praising God; listen to Christian music; be still and listen for the voice of the Holy Spirit).
Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded Be clean on the outside and on the inside. Don't let sin linger in your mind. You can filter your thoughts, rejecting satan's lies and replacing them with God's truth. Thoughts control your emotions which in turn control your actions.
Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom.[b] Are you laughing about your sin? Feel like you're getting away with something? Ask God to fill you with the sorrow that brings repentance. If you've never agonized over your sin you need to have a serious chat with God.
Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. You're hopeless without Him... ADMIT IT.
I love you all so much. Thanks for listening.
Splashi
I was "trapped" in bondage to cybersex for years, and I still am fighting the daily battle to overcome ... believe me I know every argument. I told myself:
"It's better to "make believe" adultery than to do it in real life... "
"It's not REALLY fornication..."
"It's SAFE SEX without risk of pregnancy or disease..."
"And besides, there is always the knowledge of God's grace... and I know that nothing can separate me from the love of God....
On and on my mind would go.. grasping at ways to make it right... to make me stop despising myself... to quiet the convicting voice of the Holy Spirit.
I would cry out to God for help and then drink so that I couldn't hear His answer. Guess who I went whining to for help? People with the same problem.. so you can imagine where that got me.
I know there are some of you still struggling with the issue of whether or not this is sin, especially if you are unmarried. God wants to see his precious children set free. He loves us all so very much. He's put it on my heart to look into the question and bring it forward here for that purpose.
Jesus himself said, You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not commit adultery. But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:27-29
That addresses the issue of LOOKING, perhaps that would cover viewing pornography and webcam cybering... does that include just TALKING?
Jesus called the crowd to him and said, "Listen and understand. What goes into a man's mouth does not make him 'unclean,' but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him 'unclean.' " Matthew 15:10-12
Do we really need to talk about how important our words are? Jesus is called THE WORD. God spake the whole world into being with His WORD.
We have forgiveness for our sins because Jesus died on the cross to pay the price we owed. We also have the indwelling Holy Spirit empowering us to say NO to temptations. We have been justified in Christ, and we're being sanctified.
It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 1 Thes 4:2-4
I know that some of you are asking yourself, "If we know we're going to be forgiven, then why fight the battle? After all, nobody can live up to God's standards of holiness; why bother to try? It's hopeless. I've tried. I failed. I give up."
It matters because you are suffering with shame and guilt; because your testimony to the power of God to set you free isn't in evidence; and because you are wasting valuable time that could be spent serving God. But the main reason it matters is because it minimizes the cross and the sacrifice that Jesus went through to give you the GRACE to say NO when you don't say it! Do you love God enough to make a sacrifice for him?
If you are struggling with sexual immorality in your mind... even if it stays there in your mind and you don't cyber, don't look at porn, and don't talk about sex to others; you still have sin in your heart and you must cry out to God desperately with your need.
We have this passage of scripture to guide us in overcoming:
Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. James 4:7-10
Let's break it down step by step....
Therefore submit to God. (Cry out to Him that you can't do this and are dependent on his mercy and grace)
Resist the devil and he will flee from you. (Say NO! Be willing to take whatever steps necessary to resist. Maybe you need to put a filter on your internet; delete messenger; block certain people; find an accountability partner or join a support group.)
Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. (There is NO substitute for reading or listening to the Word of God. Make it your top priority; consider getting Bible on CD and listening in your car as you drive; spend time praising God; listen to Christian music; be still and listen for the voice of the Holy Spirit).
Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded Be clean on the outside and on the inside. Don't let sin linger in your mind. You can filter your thoughts, rejecting satan's lies and replacing them with God's truth. Thoughts control your emotions which in turn control your actions.
Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom.[b] Are you laughing about your sin? Feel like you're getting away with something? Ask God to fill you with the sorrow that brings repentance. If you've never agonized over your sin you need to have a serious chat with God.
Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. You're hopeless without Him... ADMIT IT.
I love you all so much. Thanks for listening.
Splashi
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splash
Splash
Splash, Thanks Sis. You are expressing yourself on an issue that many will not come to admit or talk about. I am blessed to have someone as you to openly share your experience and hope. We have to learn not to fall in satan's little traps for the temporary satisfaction which usually just leads to more and more. People need a place to come where they can share with each other their problems without being condemned and judged.
And we do not judge here. We are all sinners that are saved by the Grace and Love of God in which is unconditional.
If we have a weakness in some area, it is up to us to find the Solution. The big thing is that we HAVE to want to get rid of this thinking and lifestyle. We have to accept that it won't be easy, but God will help us when He knows we are really trying.
Paul talks about the carnal (fleshly) nature in the Book of Corinthians. He also states.......... Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? God forbid."
I have found that many sin because of this verse.>>>>Ecclesiastes 8:11 (New International Version)
11 When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.
We may not suffer the wrath immediately, but we will have to answer one day.
Thanks again for your post friend. God Bless and luv ya. Real.
And we do not judge here. We are all sinners that are saved by the Grace and Love of God in which is unconditional.
If we have a weakness in some area, it is up to us to find the Solution. The big thing is that we HAVE to want to get rid of this thinking and lifestyle. We have to accept that it won't be easy, but God will help us when He knows we are really trying.
Paul talks about the carnal (fleshly) nature in the Book of Corinthians. He also states.......... Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? God forbid."
I have found that many sin because of this verse.>>>>Ecclesiastes 8:11 (New International Version)
11 When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.
We may not suffer the wrath immediately, but we will have to answer one day.
Thanks again for your post friend. God Bless and luv ya. Real.
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realtmg - Posts: 1051
- Location: KY. LAKE
- Marital Status: Divorced
Splash, I love you. Thank you for speaking His Word into your life and sharing His Word with others.
All of you inspire me.
Moon, what an excellent idea -- a weekly spiritual warfare STudy/Sharing.
God is so very Good.
Love, hugs and God's blessings to all of you,
Mack
All of you inspire me.
Moon, what an excellent idea -- a weekly spiritual warfare STudy/Sharing.
God is so very Good.
Love, hugs and God's blessings to all of you,
Mack
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Mackenaw - Posts: 2414
- Location: NY
- Marital Status: Married
Praise God
Splash
Thank you for opening up to us, and helping us deal with temptation. We all have weakness in our lives, and I thank God that He is using you to lead us in purifying ourselves.
Bless you and 's
Dominick
Thank you for opening up to us, and helping us deal with temptation. We all have weakness in our lives, and I thank God that He is using you to lead us in purifying ourselves.
Bless you and 's
Dominick
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Domo1364 - Posts: 16
- Location: Las Vegas NV
- Marital Status: Waiting on God
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