Christianity Oasis Forum

[anne marie]

Hello Amber

Good Luck on your journey down the path. It is a wonderful place to be!!!!
I loved reading your prayers at the end of each of your entries. They are so touching.
Keep moving forward!!!

[Dora]

To answer your question Pine, I believe that most of the stories came from a need to have attention. I had a rough childhood (rough for me anyways, although compared to some of the childhoods other people have had, it really isn't all that bad!) With my father gone on the road all the time and my mother in a constant drunken or drugged up state, I would make up lies at school to earn the attention of my classmates. From there it just kept getting worse and worse until I was making up fake boyfriends and all that. It even caused me to get into trouble in high school.

I think I understand. Having a dad who is absent a lot and a mom who has such issues could cause a person to grow up with some issues. I'm sorry you grew up like that. But the reason why, really doesn't matter. Cause that is all behind us. It hurts I'm sure. Because there is a hole left with in your heart from the absence of the love and acceptance of two loving parents who participated in your life.

You recognize it's because you are seeking attention. That is great you recognize this! But attention from humans will never fill that void that is with in you. You're on the right path to finding the one who can and will, if you let Him and continue to seek Him. I appreciate your honesty. You are doing well.

I will be gone for a while but will be praying for you. God loves ya and so do I!

[amberwindsor]

Stepping Stone 5.

Well, it seems that I'm slightly ahead of where I'm supposed to be. I wasn't supposed to be identifying the problems today and I've already done some of that!

I do have a problem with blaming others. Just like what Pine wrote in the last message, I do tend to blame things on my past. I have been known to blame most of my depression problems on my mother which is something that I shouldn't do.

Dear God, help me to accept the responsiblilty of the sins I commit and to stop blameing others for what I do. Help me to make peace with those I have blamed.

[momof3]

Hi Amber,

You are doing awesome in these steps. As i read the prayer you posted this time i was reminded of my mom. Different situation, different circumstances..but emotionally damaging just the same. Sis, when it comes to forgiveness..one thing to remember is this....these people who have hurt us..those who are so entangled in addictions..drugs, alcohol, even as simple as the addiction to negative ways of thinking...(yeah, that can be an addiction..what we are used to..what brings comfort to our own safety zones) remember that these people are just humans...fighting the same enemy we are fighting. They are in need just as much as we are for Jesus and His saving grace and healing. Something, somewhere...sometime, someone hurt them too..being used by the enemy of our souls to hurt as many as he can. He uses our weaknesses against us where the Lord uses them for His glory. Forgiveness starts with a decision to do so..then, help from the Lord. Easy, no...but know that these people..and you yourself in the times you hurt someone else...were being used and hurt by our greatest enemy. He comes to kill, steal and destroy and uses who he can or addictions or anything he can to do so.

we are all in need of His grace and healing and forgiveness, sis. When we think about how the enemy works, God's grace and love for us means so very much more. None of us are perfect, but we all need His grace.

God bless you on this jouney. Prayers are with you. You can do this cuz Christ has said you can..and He has already done it. He already has victory over every situation and every circumstance in your life..and in your childhood. He was there then, too...and knew what He would do through the experiences you would contend with.

Praying and standing with ya, girl. Keep goin. Youre doing an awesome job. God is so good..in all things.

in Jesus,
luv momo

[amberwindsor]

Thanks for your encouragement Momo and everyone else! It makes things so much easier!!!

Stepping Stone 6.

Whew!! That was a lot to read tonight!! It was more than worth it though, it was an excellent stepping stone. The miracle grow chart will defiantly be something that I will be printing off....I do much better with a written chart than anything else!

This will be a big help to me and will help me fill up a lot of my free time. Being as I don't have a job or a car, this will prove to be very VERY helpful.

Dear God, help me to keep up with my chart so that I can grow as one of your children.

[amberwindsor]

Stepping Stone 7.

I LOVED the diagrams in this step, I'll have to be sure and print of the mind chart! Today's been a rather slow day, not much going on here, hence the reason for my oddly early post! I have been much better about listening to Christian music as I do my lessons and I'm going to start trying to find a little quite time to spend with God. I am also getting much better at praying during the day and before I go to bed.

Well that's about all I have to say for now, thinkin about raking all the leaves out of my mother-in-law's flower garden!

Dear God, You're AWSOME!!!! I admit that I had my share of doubts about this program, but I can see the small changes that are happening like my want to be closer to you. I pray that I grow closer to you over time and that I never forget that you're.....AWSOME!!!!!

[amberwindsor]

Stepping Stone 8.

Amazing...the more I do, the shorter time it seems to take me! And the more pleasureable a the same time! Trials and tribulations....I have more than my fair share it seems. Of course, I've never been able to handle them well....I tend to yell and scream or burst into tears. From now on I'll have to make sure and train myself to always pray about them and hand the reigns over to God.

I can tell the changes within myself a little each day, and I'm lovin' it! I must say that I've seen a decrease in the amount of depression symptoms than usual as well, it's a good feeling to be happy some times!

Dear God, help me to settle my trials and tribulations through you instead of trying to handle them on my own. And God, help my mother-in-law too please, she needs you right now.

[amberwindsor]

Stepping Stone 9.

I feel closer to God than I ever have. Much to my suprise today and for the first time ever, I actually SAW the result of an answered prayer. I prayed last night "And God, help my mother-in-law too please, she needs you right now."

This morning, she came out of her bedroom and sat the household down and FINALLY laid down some rules for the house, something that she's needed to do ever since I met her. She said that she was tired of everyone running all over her and that it was time that she was given so RESPECT. I know that it can't be easy for her to have all 3 of her kids (the youngest getting ready to turn 24) and their spouses living in the same house with her, but easy or not, there is NO REASON for her to allow any of us to run over her. I myself are guilty every once in a while. I am SO PROUD OF HER!!!! And I'm thrilled that God helped her, she definantly deserved it.

This stepping stone was about changing your lifestyle, which is something that I'm working on little by little. I do have many bad habits; cussing and using the Lord's name in vain are probably my worst ones right now. I am working hard to change them. I am much better at catching myself before I speak, making sure that what I have to say doesn't involve any cursing or any other unsavory commentary.

Dear God, Praise be to you!!!!!! Thank you so very much for helping my mother-in-law. Now Lord I pray that you help her cope with the death of her step-father....no one should have to have the dreams she is having.

[havingfaithagain53]

Amber~

Your such an inspiration to a lot of us... even if you don't see it.. You are doing such a AWESOME job of being REAL... that is hard to find nowadays...

Isn't it awesome to see how the Lord is working not only IN YOU .. but AROUND YOU TOO??? You are doing everything you are suppose to be doing it sounds like. You will keep seeing the results that your searching for in every step you take. That's why your JOY is getting to be more and more and the depression is getting less and less. I KNOW from experience too that this program WORKS! After the Lord helped me in one thing ... then I kept searching and found more and more things to do... trust me.. you will NEVER run out of things to learn on here to help you grow closer to the Lord!

Thanks for sharing your life with all of us... you are truly a BLESSING in more ways than you know. Keep fighting the GOOD FIGHT OF FAITH.... and the REWARDS ARE UNREAL!!!

Praying for you and your family.... May every step you take show you that not only is GOD AWESOME... HE IS THE GOD OF HEALING, LOVE, FORGIVENESS, GRACE, HAPPINESS, JOY, PEACE... AND MANY MANY MORE that YOU WILL BE EXPERIENCING AS YOU KEEP FOLLOWING AFTER HIM...

Love in Christ,
Linda

[amberwindsor]

Thank you so much for your comment Havingfaith! I wasn't aware that I was having such an impact....

I'm trying to stop lying to myself as well as to others, hince the reason for my honesty. Up until now I have chosen to hide some problems and lie about others, which isn't the way to grow closer to out Lord. I appreciate your prayer for my family and myself, all prayers are welcomed!!!!

Stepping Stone 10.

Prayer.....something I've always struggled with. Because of my unnaturally shy nature, I've always had trouble sharing my thoughts and problems with others, including God. This has made my prayer life over the years practically no-exsistant to say the least. It comes from a feeling of "no one cares" (which I am overcoming a little more every day, praise God!!!!) I know that I shouldn't feel that way, I know that God cares, and I have Grandparents who care (more than I first knew) and I married into a very loving and supportive family. My mother-in-law is an amazing woman, and a strong Christian, although she too has been struggling in her walk with God since having divorced her 2nd husband.

By following the steps, I have began to establish a prayer life, even though it is a small one right now. I hope to continue to grow as a Christian and improve my prayer life over time. I know that it will take a lot of work, and even more Faith when it comes to my prayers being answered, but I'm sure I can manage with God's help!

Dear God, you've brought back to this site after a long absence for a reason. I needed to start this course so that I could grow closer to you and learn many a tough lesson, many of which I have chose to ignore up until now. Please Lord, help me to continue to grow so that I may do Your will.

[Mackenaw]

Hello Amberwindsor

God bless you this day.

I've been reading along with your posts. I love how you are addressing the portions of the study that really impacted or stood out to you. That's awesome!!!

Prayer is such an amazing blessing. God has given us the ability to communicate with Him, to praise Him, to talk to Him, and to ask of Him. And, He is available 24/7. Amazing!!!

Amber, I really encourage you to talk to Him, and make prayer a priority. I know you'll be blessed by it. And as you grow in your relationship with The Lord, you'll want to pray more and more for others -- which, in my mind, is one of the most loving things we can do for another.

I'm sending up prayers to our Lord, on your behalf. May God's blessed will be done.

God bless and keep you, Amberwindsor.
Love,
Mack

[amberwindsor]

Awwww!!! Thank you for your comment Mack! It means a lot to know that so many people care about me!!!!!

Stepping Stone 11.

Surrender!! I think I can handle that. Out of everything, I think that surrendering my life will be one of the easiest thing I've done yet. I am so happy with these lessons!!! Everything has began to become a pleasure for me other than a chore. Of course, it really wasn't a chore at first either, I just had to push myself a little bit harder to do the lessons. I feel myself growing closer and closer every day, and it feels AWSOME!!!! Which reminds me.....God is AWSOME!!!!!!!

Dear God, You're being a great help to me! I've always struggled with life and everything else, but now I am realizing that everything happens for a reason that has to do with Your plan for my life. Please help me to continue to forgive everyone, despite their wrong-doings towards me.

Please help my husband keep his job, if it is Your will for him to have it. You know that we have struggled in the almost two years of our marriage, and with You that's not a problem.