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Postby vahn » Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:51 pm

Final day , this is one of the most fulfilling walks I had taken in all my other efforts to come absolutely clean with my Lord and finally have a firm and most intimate"talk" with Him the past 7 days .

Today I made my last round of asking forgiveness from all whom I had harmed here and also the world outside , including the person who took my daughter's life , and in fact , I have even made plans to meet this guy face to face to offer him my forgiveness .

Ever drive down the highway for a long stretch and have this driver behind you riding your bumper for hours on end , and no matter what you do you just simply cannot shake him off ? Whether you slow down , hit the brakes or even pick up speed to the point of going 95 miles an hour and he's still in your rear view mirror ? Usually I find that very aggravating . Today just that happened , with a twist .
As I mentioned , this morning I made my rounds and attempted to clean my side of the street by holding myself accountable to the last remnants of any and all harms done on my part , asking for forgiveness and offering amends , to get rid of the "tailgaiter" , before heading for work .
On the road , in this big ol' truck , and almost from the first mile on the pike this guy was right on my tail so close I couldn't see him from my side mirrors but nevertheless I could see the car's shadow on the road , only this time I found myself amused by him rather than aggravated , and the events of the past few days started flashing through my head and I was realized feeling lighter and lighter everytime I checked on mr. bumper jockey . 1.5 to 2 hours later coming to Connecticut from Maine , there's a quite a stretch in front , I decided to play a game with this guy , slow down , pick up , tap the brakes , give a left signal change to the right , the works , finally , picking up speed up to 85 miles an hour this guy decides to pass me right ? hmm , that's not enough , he gives me the one finger wave as he passes !! I mean this guy is mad !?! I just couldn't hold myself from laughing out loud . I'm going "You're doing me a favor bucko !" . Five miles later he's on the shoulder with blue lights behind him .

You know , after coming clean with the Lord , knowing without a doubt that you are forgiven by Him , you just simply can't help but laugh at loud at the follies of the "bumper jockey" especially when you get to see the blue lights behind him .

I had made arrangements with my employers to take the NC Rte. sometime this week to get a chance to visit this guy in jail and shake him off my rear mirrors by forgiving him face to face , taking my laptop and wireless net with me , in case I chicken out or something , I will keep posting whenever I get a chance , but then again , I may not even be able to post at all again , but whatever the outcome , I would like to express my utmost gratitude to each and everyone of you here who played a part , good or better , in bringing me to this point of my life , I simply could not have done it without you , yes I hear you , "thank the Lord vahn" yeah , who do you think brought me here !!
Thank you all . All 800+ of you .
May God bless you and keep you , until then .
vahn
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Postby lizzie » Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:30 pm

brother, may God be with you on your journey, which may be one of the most difficult and daunting things you have to face but which may also be a very important key to your healing.

Your family here will stand with you in prayer and support for God's will to be done.

*hug* GBU vahn
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Postby comfy » Thu Oct 29, 2009 3:08 pm

"My yoke is easy and My burden is light" (in Matthew 12:30)

Race car drivers and runners will stay right behind someone else, to have the one ahead break the wind. In the Marathon in Boston, I read, the woman stars were not tickled about how *men* would run behind them to keep the air moving for them. May be the guy was trying to save gas by staying right in the tug of your backwashing air coming from around your truck.

Years ago, I would see someone too close, and I'd signal to turn off and go off on a side road, then get back on, again, after the tailgater had moved on.

But that might make it too easy, so you don't get to gain patience and creativity the way God would do it with you ;)

So, Vahn . . . you're reading this? you're back ? ? ? Good to see you, planning on reading how you did . . . creatively > God has His unique and special ways and plans, for us to discover, not just to think up ourselves and choose :) So, we all have this adventure, today, of discovering how You would like to have us be with You and do all You please . . . please and thank You, in the name of Jesus > please bless and be with Vahn, and blessing ones like tailgaters and others.

"bless and do not curse" (in Romans 12:14) >
"not returning evil for evil" (in 1 Peter 3:9)

But, yesterday, a guy turned his pickup in front of me in town, where I was walking. I'm saying he needs to look, that he drove in front of me; he says, "Oh yeah . . . you have to be careful," or something like this. Of course, he didn't come really close to me, and he's right > I do have to keep my own eyes open, because there are people who will do things wrong. Now I'd like to meet him, again, so I can tell him I see he's pretty smart and I'd like to know what he does ;) and maybe apologize for being picky and trying to babysit him.

I guess we need people to get our goat, in order to expose how we still can give in to fussing about stupid nonsense.

If anybody can get your goat,
you need to get that goat
o - u - t of you,
so nobody can get it ;)
and get the Lamb of God
in there, instead >
"I am gentle and lowly in heart"
(in Matthew 11:29)
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Postby momof3 » Fri Oct 30, 2009 10:57 pm

God bless you, vahn. May He continue to lead you in His plan and will for your life. My prayers are with you as you seek this part of your healing from the Lord. God be with you and will see ya when you get back.

In the ams of God, you are.

in Jesus,
luv momo *Pray*
James 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
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Postby Dora » Sat Oct 31, 2009 10:32 am

Some advice a friend gave me that I pass on to you....
Stop looking in the rear view mirror.
What's in the past is just that, past.
Look forward.

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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Postby comfy » Sat Oct 31, 2009 11:07 am

things to get our attention away from God

and get us down out of His peace

"If it is possible, as much as depends on you,
live peaceably with all men." (Romans 13:18)

"No one engaged in warfare entangles himself with the affairs of this life,
that he may please him who enlisted him as a soldier." (2 Timothy 2:4)

It is not my job to control Satan's people. But I can try . . . and find out how they then can drag me down, after decoying me with their evil and stupid nonsense, and get me tangled and mangled and strangled with "cares of this world" (in Matthew 13:22).

He might be that desperately lonely, that he seeks the company of another car in front of him. Each person is different > it could be interesting to find out from each one why he or she tailgates.
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Postby vahn » Sun Nov 01, 2009 10:18 am

Once again Thank you all (maybe I should copy this statement and keep pasting it after each reply :) )

On the bright side of Pine and comfy's replies , and comfy you being from Mass you may even identify with this one .

A severe snow storm catches this lady on the road by surprize , that storm so severe she cant even see past the hood of her car and of course , naturally panicking she starts praying (funny how some people only pray when panick strikes) saying the usual mi mi mi's , I'll be good , I'll start going to church ... yada yada right ? without even finishing her prayer yet , this plow-truck appears right in front of her and she immediately she says "oh , never mind all that God I can find my way now ok ? " and she proceeds following the plow-truck . 20 -30 minutes later the plow driver stops , gets out of his truck , walks up to the lady and says , " I don't know what you're doing or where you trying to go lady but following me you've been going around in circles behind me for half an hour now , I'm just clearing up Macy's parking lot ok ? "

Just a joke I thought I'd throw in there to break the monotony
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Postby Mackenaw » Sun Nov 01, 2009 6:48 pm

rofl
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Postby Dora » Sun Nov 01, 2009 7:12 pm

rofl

then back to praying she goes.
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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Postby comfy » Sun Nov 01, 2009 11:32 pm

*laughter* going around in circles with that kind of praying, indeed

Yeah, once my mother and I were going on the Massachusetts Turnpike to Albany, and it got snowy. She was calling it "white out", but I could see cars, I think, in front of us. At one point, we actually stopped, and I got out of the car, maybe to do the windows. It was a novel sensation to be out on the Pike, with cars behind me, and step around a little.
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