Christianity Oasis Forum

[loveiskind]

For this blog, I was asked to list my trials and tribulations as a young Christian, so I'm copying and pasting what I blogged in the Christian Forum. I've deleted a few things and added a few.

From the time I was a teenager, my mom would put me down, saying that because of my handicaps, no man would ever want to marry me. However, since I started going to church regularly in 1998 (I was 32 at the time), the put-downs happened a lot more frequently. Then, in 1999, when I started going to a church where the people actually showed me they loved me, and wanted to do things for me, not only did the put-downs escalate, but I got ridiculed, criticized, you name it. If someone bought me something for no reason, I owed that person. If I bought something for someone for no reason, I was stupid. I once bought a friend a bunch of flowers, as a little thank-you, for letting her three boys help me with things at church. Mom said it looked like I was bribing her. Another friend gave me a beautiful keepsake box, and Mom wanted to know why on earth she would do that. Yet another said I reminded her of Cinderella, which I took as a nice compliment. I found out I'd made a mistake by telling Mom about it when she asked a sarcastic "Why?" (That made me think that she thought I was ugly.) If I dressed up a little, or wore a little makeup, she'd ask who I was trying to impress. One time, I wanted to volunteer at the local hospital, and she tried to get me not to, saying they wouldn't want a blind person volunteering, and I wouldn't be able to do it. (I am legally blind.) Another time, I joined the church choir, but after 2 months had to leave it because I kept getting laryngitis from the singing. Mom insisted that the choir director 'fired' me, saying my voice wasn't good enough. If I said a guy was nice, or even nice-looking, she would say I was boy-crazy. Once, I left church after Sunday School, to get ready to go to camp for a week. When I told mom I wanted to get some hugs from friends before I left, she said I was stupid. If I'd tell her I had a problem, she'd sigh really loudly, roll her eyes and say "What's wrong now?" If my opinion on something differed from hers, she'd be angry with me.
Things were to the point that although I knew the Bible was truth, I found it easier to believe what she said about me than what the Bible says. It wasn't until I started counseling almost 2 years ago that I started believing the Bible more than I did my subconscious.

[Mackenaw]

Hello Loveiskind

God bless you, dear sister.

I know we've had a couple conversations about the hurtful things said to you in your past and I am so happy to see you have learned that those hurtful thoughts needed to be weeded out and replaced with the Truth -- what God says in His Word, The Bible.

I know that you did the 14-Day CCCC Program and have worked hard on those charts, and replaced lies with Truth.

I'm so glad you are continuing your Studies here, and look forward to hearing your thoughts that are as a result of communing with The Holy Spirit and feeding yourself The Word. You are such a blessing to me and to so many others. God has given you such a loving heart.

I love you, dear sister Loveiskind and Jesus loves you more.
God bless you,
Sister Mack

[dubya]

Awesome Loveiskind,

I am glad you have chosen to take the Many Called Few Chosen study, altho I am sorry you had to go thru so many trials and tribulations during your Christian walk. However you can be comforted by the Holy Spirit cause thru him we can be made overcomers.

Now one of the key points of the mcfc program is to look for people who are struggling with some of the same things you have and lend a helping hand to them just as the Holy Spirit has helped you. This is how we support and help our fellow brothers and sisters.

If ya need any help with the program feel free to pm me either on the forums or in chat.


God bless you loveiskind