Christianity Oasis Forum

[wonder777]

I am 37 and from North Carolina. I have a high functioning form or autism called Asperger's Syndrone. It's a long story but I was sexually abused as a kid by my stepfather who was an alcoholic and behavior problems developed out of that, aggravated by my autism (it wasn't until 1999 just after he died I was diagnosed with AS). In a nutshell, there was foster care and lashing out that got me put in a psych ward at 11. Then I was raped again twice by the same man at 13 when I came back to my family. Finally at 17, I told about what was done to me. He never went to jail and I had tried to kill him twice, even having a friend from elementary school cast a spell on him despite me being a Christian. I didn't care then, I was angry. When he died, I didn't even go to the funeral. Now, for the last year, God has been dealing with me about forgiving him and I have expressed interest in doing that. But I don't know what to do beyond that. All kinds of issues have come up some of which I have no idea of. Primarily because of what was done to me, I can't bring myself to drink, smoke or do drugs. But when it comes to sex, it's God's way and that's it. Maybe this journal can further me to eventual forgiveness.

[realtmg]

wonder,
Welcome to Oasis!
I am glad you found us and was impressed with your first post.
I am also glad you are seeking forgiveness.
Take your time and take each step slow and thorough.
You will begin to find peace and healing.

GBU!

Real.....

[Dora]

Hello Sis. Here's a gentle hug if you want one...

I'm sorry for what happened to you. I hope you accept that not attending the funeral of this person who violated your body is ok. God does not expect us to put our minds through that type of pain. It's ok to not think about that person. What that person did was very wrong and even angers God. Our Father will and has dealt with this person. It's ok for you to let God have His will with the person. It's ok for you to be Gods child free from the burden of getting even or hating. He is willing to walk with you through letting go. It can be a slow process. It's ok though, He is very patient.

My prayers are with you sis.

[mlg]

Hello wonder777,

Welcome to the counseling program....Healing and forgiveness....I see you seeking them by beginning this study, and I know God is wanting to bless you with both. The healing will bring a newness to your heart and the forgiveness will lift the burdens of the past...and allow you to be all that God wants you to be. Good things are ahead.....and with God by your side you can't go wrong.

May you find His grace on your journey.

Take care