Christianity Oasis Forum

[Emmy]

I'm only 16, but last year I was the victim of what people tell me (and what I myself am pretty sure) was an abusive relationship. I mean at first he was this amazing guy... a perfect gentleman, presented himself as a strong Christian, outgoing, friendly. All that good stuff. I felt like I could trust him with anything, right off the bat. And of course one thing led to another, and soon enough we were in a relationship.

Long story short, within the month that we were together, I was emotionally, and somewhat physically abused by him. He would give me the silent treatment for nothing, to the point where I would no longer allow myself to speak to him first for fear of it happening again. I remember sending him a text saying "hi" one time, and spending the rest of the night having on-and-off panic attacks because of it. He would call me stupid, weird, etc. and patronize me like nothing else. Around him, I felt like the scum of the earth, because that was how he made me feel. And it wasn't always straight out insults; often, he would somehow manage to make me terrified of him - like I was walking on eggshells continually - and I wouldn't know where that fear came from. Then, towards the end of the relationship, he would start to push me around, and take it beyond playfighting. When we were friends, we would always playfight, but he never hurt me before. It was when it would start to hurt, and I would come home with bruises on my arms and sides that I realized how bad it was getting.

I'm out of this relationship now, but the scars still remain, and are affecting my current relationships. How do I overcome this?

[mlg]

Hey Emmy, overcoming abuse of any kind takes healing. It's not often easy to overcome either, but I know someone who wants to help you heal and overcome. His name is Jesus. He loves you very much Emmy, and He wants you to allow Him to be your friend. He will not harm you, as He is without sin, and is pure and good. He just wants you to let Him be part of your life.

I just want you to know that there is a whole future of joy waiting for you. The past does not have to hold you down and bind you. Forgiveness is a big part of letting go of the past. Forgiving someone does not mean that what that guy you dated did to you was right...instead it says you will no longer give that guy power over you...it means you are letting go and moving forward...and yes you may be a tad more cautious in the future...but again don't let the past keep you from grabbing hold of the good things life has to offer.

Praying for you Emmy.



Take care and Welcome to the Oasis!