Christianity Oasis Forum


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day 1

Postby chbalco » Wed Jun 27, 2012 10:46 pm

today was a roller coaster day of emotions, sadness, anger, confusion, grief, happiness...So many emotions..I showed up to work today and my boss told me the I hear you have had a relationship change is that why you have been so out of sorts for the last few months, Myself and my now ex gf had all sorts of problems,verbal abuse,physical abuse on her part, which I now realize all stemmed from my constant verbal abuse and her only way of retaliating was to be physically abusive, I firmly believe that God is teaching me a very valuable lesson right now and making me feel exactly how I have made people feel in the past by the words I have spoke and the actions that I have done,She has started dating a new guy and literally over night I have become a stranger to her, she wants nothing to do with me, She is well aware of how bad I am hurting because like a blubbering fool I have told her how heart broken I am, I have a deep pitting burn knot in my stomach, chest and throat that has been there since last thursday when I found all of this out. I havent been able to eat more then a few bites a day, or sleep more then an hour or so a night, I try to stay active and workout until I am so exhausted If I dont stop I will pass out, Today I felt so horrible and couldnt focus, I have a professional job that demands concentration, I told my boss what was going on and that I wanted to go home, She told me, you are a professional and you need to pull yourself together and focus on your job, If I send you home right now you will be going to a empty house, she isnt there anymore and the fact that she is dating another man should tell you that she wants nothing to do with you, if you go home to a empty house I am afraid something bad will happen to you, you are not going home tonight (I work 48 hr shifts on the ambulance) If you leave tonight you are done here, so you need to be a professional and work through this and focus on your patient care...I dont want to lose my job and I totally agree with her...I know I need to refocus my attention away from her and focus on how Jesus can change me into the man that he wants me to be so badly( he has already started by showing me exactly how I make people feel with the words I choose to use and my actions towards people), I personally believe that God has placed this in my life to show me how badly he wants to be back in my life, and I am ready for him to take over completely, I am the one who is allowing myself to feel this way, No one can make you feel bad about yourself unless you allow them to,So I am making the choice to begin my healing process here where I feel god has lead me, and confession my sins to the world, I have had issues with lust,greed,disrespect,alcohol addiction,lying,cheating,stealing And Today I am proclaiming that I want to make Jesus my sole focus in life and Hand EVERYTHING over to him, because I cannot do this on my own,I have tried and failed miserably, My spirit is so weak and broken right now and my emotions are so crazy right now,But in the end this will all make me a better man for the Right woman for me and my beautiful kids who are my absolute world

Please pray for me to have the strength and courage to endure this heartbreak so that I may move past it and learn from my mistakes, So far it has not been easy for me and I hope someone can give me some words of encouragement and advice to help me in my new christ centered Life on ways for me to heal my heart
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Re: day 1

Postby Mackenaw » Thu Jun 28, 2012 3:09 am

Hello Chbalco,

God bless you this day. I'm glad that The Lord led you here, and that you have made the decision to seek Him. He really does love you, Chbalco.

I know your journal says Day 1, but does that mean you have already begun the CCCC 14-Day Study? Well, just in case the answer is no, here is the link to the Study: http://www.christianityoasis.com/CCCC/Forum.htm

Also, there are many other studies on this site that I know you'll enjoy and benefit from, because all them are Holy Spirit inspired and lean heavily on the Word of God, including the CCCC 14-Study. Here is a link to the list of Christian Walk Studies: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keywor ... tudies.htm

Chbalco, I understand how your heart is hurting, but you are doing well in seeking The Lord. The Holy Spirit of God is our Comforter, and He knows how to comfort you, perfectly. Talk to Him, He is right there with you.

I am lifting up prayers to our Lord in the name of Jesus, on your behalf. May God's blessed will be done.

Chbalco, continue to seek The Lord He really does love you, and has been waiting for you to seek Him with arms wide open.

Hope to see you around the site, and possibly in Chat, too. :)

God bless and keep you.
In Christ Jesus' love,
Sister Mack
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Re: day 1

Postby Ruthk34 » Thu Jun 28, 2012 5:51 am

Hi Chbalco welcome to the site.

My prayers are with you. Know that things will get better. It takes some time but with the Lord with you makes it possible.
One of my favorite verses is Philipians 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me"

God Bless you
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Re: day 1

Postby Christnundrconstruxn » Thu Jun 28, 2012 7:33 am

Hello brother and welcome to the Oasis,
I here all you are saying but I ask that you listen to our sister mack and go to the counseling pages here and emerse yourself into them as well as go to the Lord and ask that He gives you the strength, knowledge and ability to heal from this and become the man He created you to be.
As for those other issues yes you need to be delivered from it all BUT please do not over welm yourself, go to God and ask that He heal you as He wishes, remember you are on HIS time scale NOT yours, and if you stumble and fall it does NOT mean you failed it means get up brush your self off and continue on.
We are all here for you and will pray for you to find healing.
this is a little something (kinda silly BUT it works) when you find yourself angery or wanting to lash out....imagine the Lord is standing behind you listening, or if you are driving imagine the Lord is in your car listening to your reaction and the Holy spirit is in the car that cut you off or whatever they done, IF you give this a try I promise you WILL see a difference.
The heart will heal but you have to allow it to happen in Gods time.
God bless
Cuc
LET GO AND LET GOD!!
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day 2

Postby chbalco » Thu Jun 28, 2012 9:56 am

God bless you all

I am so thrilled that I have found a forum that is jesus based to help inspire me on my journey to reestablish my relationship with the lord

I would like to mention that I was raised in a christian home, Have accepted jesus into my heart long ago, followed christ by water baptism...and have studied the bible...BUT even though I have always believed in God..I allowed the devil to hold me down and lead me into a life of addiction,abuse,lying,cheating,stealing,womanizing,ego,arrogance and pretty much every other sin you can think of short of murder... the devil was allowed by me to steal the precious gift of a christ centered life...NEVER AGAIN!!!...I also want to mention that I am free and clear of alcohol, and no longer taking any prescription meds(they work for people who need them...In my case I have realized all they did was mask my emotions and cause me to crave alcohol...I stopped drinking before stopping the meds a few months before...but continued to crave alcohol...since being medication free I have absolutely NO desire to drink alcohol...Even during all of this emotional turmoil..I have no desire to drink..I very rarely ever consumed alcohol prior to taking meds..So it only makes sense to me that the medications attributed to my excessive consumption of alcohol...medications and alcohol have the exact opposite effect on me as other people) I have actually been able to cry for the first time in so long and it has helped cleanse my soul...I DONT NEED ALCOHOL OR MEDICATIONS...JESUS IS THE PHYSICIAN AND PRESCRIPTION FOR EVERYTHING!!

I have absolutely no Doubts that the Lord has lead me here for Everybody here to inspire me to become the man that HE wants me to be,NOT the man that I chose to be..Thank you all soooooo much for your prayers

Sister Mack...I have started the 14 days study guide and will continue to do it 1 day at a time...I am now on day 2...I am motivated and tempted to complete it all in 1 day...BUT I know I cannot get holy in a hurry...this is going to take some time and I am willing to wait on my Lord Jesus's will in my life to start to form in my spirit

Today I woke up feeling blessed, As I was in the shower I lifted my hands high and Praised and Cried to the Lord for bringing me back to home to him...I realized how dead I have been inside for a long time without Jesus..I KNOW ALL OF YOUR PRAYERS HAVE ALREADY BEGUN TO WORK IN MY LIFE..As I type this I cry because I am so Happy that Jesus loves me so much and wanted a relationship with me so badly that he was willing to bring such a hard-ache to me..I am so sorry Lord Jesus for ever turning away and not making you the Number 1 priority in my life...It makes me so sad to think that if you love me this much,And you had to show me How much I was hurting people, How badly I Must have hurt you by turning my back and not following your will for my life

I MAKE A PUBLIC DECLARATION TO YOU RIGHT THIS SECOND JESUS...i PROMISE TO NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF YOU EVER AGAIN AND i WILL ALWAYS FOLLOW YOUR WILL NOT MATTER WHAT THE COST,I REDEDICATE MY LIFE,MY HEART AND MY SOUL TO YOU LORD AND THANK YOU FOR FINDING ME WORTHY OF YOUR LOVE,BECAUSE I KNOW THAT A SINNER LIKE ME DOESN'T DESERVE IT..THANK YOU FOR YOUR GIFT OF ETERNAL LIFE AND I ACCEPT YOUR GIFT OF ETERNAL LIFE..WHEN I STUMBLE LORD I KNOW YOU WILL BE THERE TO PICK ME UP AND GIVE ME A GREAT BIG SPIRITUAL HUG AND KISS MY WOUNDS AND HEAL THEM FOR ME..AMEN

Matthew 10:32 says Everyone who acknowledges me publicly here on earth, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven"...I WANT EVERYBODY TO HOLD ME TO THIS PROMISE AND i HAVE POSTED IT HERE, SO THAT I AM HELD TO IT FOREVER

Thank you all again so much for your prayers and words of encouragement,I cant stop sobbing...not because I am so sad and depressed anymore, but because I feel so loved by my Lord Jesus that he has brought me to this group...your prodigal son has returned home heavenly father and I never want to leave you ever again

I have found so much inspiration in music the last couple days..jars of clay-dead man, skillet-awake and alive,dc talk-what if I stumble,dc talk-into the light, dc talk-jesus freak...my Soul is well on its way to healing and I thank all of you again for your prayers..PLEASE KEEP THEM GOING

christnundrconstruxn.....what a BRILLIANT IDEA...this is EXACTLY the type of things I need to hear right now..I WILL put that advice to use immediately....How funny will it be when people see my turn around all the time and smile to jesus standing beside me before I respond to their comments...LOL...Pretty sure people will see I am a JESUS FREAK!!!!!!!!!!

I do NOT want to get ahead of Gods plan for my life...But I am so inspired to become a true witness of the power of jesus...I have decided to pick up my guitar again and play as much music as possible and become a part of a church band

thank you all again and keep your words of encouragement coming...they are inspiring my soul..PRAISE JESUS
Last edited by chbalco on Thu Jun 28, 2012 10:13 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: day 1

Postby realtmg » Thu Jun 28, 2012 10:05 am

Welcome to Oasis.
I am glad you found us as we try to help and pray for people.
We all fall short of His glory.
Lots to see here.
hang around and watch God work.

GBU

Real
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Re: day 1

Postby JohnR » Sat Jun 30, 2012 4:06 am

Lord Father I pray that you give healing & strength to brother chbalco & help him in his journey to take it one day at a time in Jesus name I pray. Amen.
God Bless
*JesusSign*
Keep on Prayin!
"All things are possible with God"
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