Christianity Oasis Forum

[sreedy1971]

Well day one, Sunday, found me wife and children coming to church. I had messaged my wife prior to services and mentioned how I could really use a hug from the heart. She didn't get the message until after services and she said sorry for not getting it sooner. The thing about this is, the pastor's sermon involved discussion of receiving hugs, particularly from God. Yet another sign I see from him, working on the situation.

Monday found me in a depressed mood once again as I had still not confirmed a job that I was hoping to start that day. Our children started VBS Monday night and my wife and I had time to grab a bite to eat and also talk for awhile. I asked her if she was willing to start letting me in more, I mean like letting down her protective walls a bit. She said she was willing to do so. I was pretty happy about that, needless to say.

Tuesday found me happier due to Monday evenings discussion. We had our third counseling session Tuesday night. It went fairly well and my wife allowed me to come to the house and sit and talk for awhile. Well I thought great, this just keeps getting better. When we went home and talked, she started off as soon as we walked in saying, we are here as friends and we need to get along for the children. She went from one end of the spectrum to the other. She has made statements to the counselor like, I'm here to fulfill an obligation and then would say something like, I want to hear him say he loves me once in a while, not quite as often as I have been saying it. She actually had kissed me once and also asked me to come to her, while sitting on the couch. The mixed signals and my emotions are wreaking havoc on me. She says I have been doing better and has stated many times that the marriage can be repaired yet she isn't sure what she wants.

Yesterday also found her with an opportunity to stop the divorce as since they didn't serve me in time it has to be completely refiled which will cost her more money. She told the counselor last week that she was willing to put it on hold for 2 months and I said this is a sign to you to make the right decision and stop the divorce and focus on saving the marriage and family along with money senselessly spent. I have yet to hear from her about what her intentions are regarding that. Either she will tell me or I'll find out if they try to serve me divorce papers again.

I just have such a hard time understanding the continual mixed messages I receive from her. I have explained that love and forgiveness are a choice and that many more people have worked through harder troubles than what we face, including both out parents. Hers have been physically abusive to each other on occasion and are married for more than 40 years. My parents were the yelling type and were married for more than 60 years. I discussed how we aren't even facing cases of adultery and that individuals reconcile even under those conditions. It just hurts and I know the children are hurting even more by not having the family unit together. I pray for her heart to be filled with the desire for our marriage and family. Time will tell and that is all I have right now.

God Bless!

[humblevisitor]

Praying for you Brother that God grants your heart's desire.

I don't know all the circumstances and I'm not asking to....God will work things out in His time. I know that you want to see it resolved ASAP and I hope and pray it will be.

God knows what is going on and what your going through...He is there for you

[sreedy1971]

Thank you Humblevisitor. Some days are harder than others. I just keep focusing on the ultimate goal have let God take over. I find myself trying to do my own thing some times and I try to get back to having God handle it as quickly as possible.

Thanks again, sreedy1971