Christianity Oasis Forum

[Dora]

Love you sister.

God wants you whole and well. There's no reason to fear with Him by your side. Though I do know even thinking of working through some things can seem like you're being tossed into the clutches of the enemy. You never need to stay there, you can always run to Him.

Here if you ever need a friend.

ing 4 U!

[ciny]

Oh God
I need to be reminded when I feel so absolutely alone
that you know my pain,
you know my weakness.
When I come to the end of words,
when my mind is full of confusion,
help me to remember that you pray for me.
When I am overwhelmed with despair,
when I want to give up,
when I want to run away in fear,
it is only your presence,
gentle, powerful Friend,
that gives me hope and strength.
I need your help today.
I need you to pray for me.
Amen

[Dora]

Amen.......me2



God loves you and so do I!!!!

[ciny]

I'am still reflecting on day one i have been told if you write it out that it was not my fault that one day
i will belive that it was not my fault,
so i will keep writing it out IT,S NOT MY FAULT untill i belive it for real so get use to seeing it in my
journal,

this part sticks out to me from the counscling steps......................................................................

Response: What does a little innocent child do to coerce another person, in particular an adult and/or authority figure, to sexually abuse them?
Answer... absolutely nothing. They are a child. They do NOT know any better. Only what they were TAUGHT. If they were taught wrong, how can they know that the act that is being taught to them by this person was wrong and even if they felt it was wrong how could they know and how could they feel it right to say no to the trusted adult or family member? there is still some anger there and deep pain it is better than it was yesterday. praying tommrow is even better

[ciny]

Entering a stage of understanding

I understand that sin enterd the world and people act upon them sinful nature i have done sin like doing drug having sex out of marriage
and i do see every sin is wrong and no sis is greater than the other. its just so paindful

Jesus died for all sinners no matter what they did he loves all the same......i just have a lot of deep pain and some of the people this one person my mom hurts alot i love her and i cant pretend it didnt happen and run from it any more like i have done in the past i dont hate her it just hurts,
i have hope in this iam not fighting the battle alone anymore that is a positve thing in my life i also find hope in this poem in the cccc steps hope its ok to put in my Journal........................ i feal like Jesus is telling me to take his hand in this poem funny the poem goes along with my dream i posted in the dream forums about the cafe at the top of the Hill

BORROW MINE
Take my hand and walk with me a while
Cause it seems your smile has left you
And don't give in, when you fall apart
And your broken heart has failed you
I'll set a light up
On a hilltop
To show you my love
For this world to see
You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
'Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine
Take my love when all that you can see
Is the raging sea all around us
And don't give up 'cause I'm not letting go
And the God we know will not fail us
We'll lay it all down
As we call out
Sweet Savior
help our unbelief
You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
'Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine
When you are weak
Unable to speak
You are not alone
The God who has saved us
Will never forsake us
He's coming to take us
Take us to our home
You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
'Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine
Take my hand
Take my love
Don't give in
Don't give up

[Dora]

When I was reading this I got a picture in my head of how does Ciny see my sins? I am certain Ciny is so easy to forgive me of my sins. You probably don't care at all that I've committed sins or hold in hatred and bitterness except that you know it hurts me. And that is how I see you. What you've done matters nothing to me. It's who you are that matters. And I see you as such a wonderful soul with so many talents and being so strong despite all the pressures in this world. Struggling with feeling alone and wondering if you'll ever mount up to enough. I see you as so much more than enough. I see you as just so precious. In the loneliness you turn to Christ which I find amazing and strengthening. If I see you this way and I'm just a human how much more Christ must see you. He knows the real you. The pure precious spotless bride that He longs to be with even more than she longs to be with Him. I know you love the Lord and long to be with Him, yet how much more He longs to be with you. It is so hard to accept isn't it? Yet I can see this for you. You probably can see this is true for me. Yet to receive it for ourselves is so difficult because of what people have done to us. I know you hurt over the past. I feel your pain. We have so much in common. The hurt runs so deep. Sometimes you might even wonder if the pain will ever go away. The sorrow, the grieving, the darkness with in, that holds us back from being all we can be in Him. Keep letting Him love on you sis. And hold tight to ever lovely lesson He is teaching you. I think of you nearly every day and I smile. Oh how much more Gods thoughts are towards you. Not only in amount but in gladness. Can you see it? If you can see He thinks of me that way, then the same is true for you. Despite how hard it is to accept, it is true. I love you dear sister. Prayers remain. I loved your dream of the cafe on the hill. I love how He gives you these things. I'm so anxious for the day we can play together on that heavenly play ground.

[ciny]

Ps 32:7 Thou art my hiding place; thou shalt preserve me from trouble; thou shalt compass me about with songs of deliverance. Selah.
(KJV)

I love what day three says about people who have abused us may have hurt our bodys but they cannot wound our souls. Our souls are hidden with Jesus and we can find peace with Jesus.

Ps 91:1 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
(KJV)
the only way our soul can be harmed is if we ponder on what they did to us i have done alot of that i pray to God to change this behavior i want to hid my self in you Jesus and find peace in Jesus name amen.

i will be back to reflect on day three again soon learn something new every time i come back here.............................................

[ciny]

still reflecting on day 3

Hide and seek made me think of how i use to play the game with my brothers and the neighbor hood kids
i enjoyed it we were all getting along enjoying it

this part made me think of God how he was with me as a kid were Hey ... Remember when we would play hide and seek as a kid?
i didnt play hide and seek with God i use to hear him talk to me real clear as a child he would tell me he was with me and would never leave me he told me he loved me i knew he was there with me and comforting me.
i rember i use to be scared as a kid i had like alot of stuffed aminals as a kid in my bed they made me feal safe i had to have lots of covers to feal safe and hide from the monsters i had bad dreams some time Jesus was in those dreams as a young child encouraging me and loveing on me letting me know he was there to.
this step is making me emotional and happy more than sad because i can truly see God was with me then and never left me like he promished me all those years ago.

[ciny]

still reflecting on day 3

Hide and seek made me think of how i use to play the game with my brothers and the neighbor hood kids
i enjoyed it we were all getting along enjoying it

this part made me think of God how he was with me as a kid were Hey ... Remember when we would play hide and seek as a kid?
i didnt play hide and seek with God i use to hear him talk to me real clear as a child he would tell me he was with me and would never leave me he told me he loved me i knew he was there with me and comforting me.
i rember i use to be scared as a kid i had like alot of stuffed aminals as a kid in my bed they made me feal safe i had to have lots of covers to feal safe and hide from the monsters i had bad dreams some time Jesus was in those dreams as a young child encouraging me and loveing on me letting me know he was there to.
this step is making me emotional and happy more than sad because i can truly see God was with me then and never left me like he promished me all those years ago.

[Zemirah]

(((((Ciny)))))) I'm glad you are seeing God as being there with you and that he keeps his promises; both those ones you remember and those he gives in scripture as well as never leaving us alone

Hide and seek; and God being there with you remind me of Psalm 139

Psalm 139
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

1 You have searched me, LORD,
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you, LORD, know it completely.
5 You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.

19 If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, LORD,
and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.


... wherever you go, there He is also

[ciny]

Day four.........He Shall bring it to pass..............love this

I can relate to the roller coaster ride always on the go to the next thrill that was short lived with out Jesus in it
it was a coastly thing to go through life with out waliking with him.and having him as a guide in my life i had walked away from God
and was sure he would not let me back and the pain i had im my life was being coverd up with material things i was drwonding it out
with alchol and drugs and material things. i was not happy.

I was wearing a mask a mask i made to hide from God my self and people now i slowly peal it off and search with in my self and see
the pain deep with in the pain and sacrs of abuse i was so affraid to look at because it hurt so bad i see Jesus looking at it with me
and i see iam slowly healing and the wounds that were so deep and seemed to have no end are closing up and the emptyness is being filled up with the healing balm of Jesus.

He walks with me and talks with me and tells me of his great love he has for me and fills me up with his Holy Spirt and love hellping me to be my self it is ok to be my self when i fall he picks me up again when iam having a good day he celabrates with me.when iam having a bad day he is comforting me.
wen i treust in the Lord with all my heart he directs my path tthankyou Lord for directing my path and walking it with me.

Pr 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
(KJV)

ty Father God for promising in your word that you will bring things to pass ty for bringing my past hurts of abuse and unforgiveness to pass.

Ps 37:5 Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
6 And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.
7 Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass.
8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil.
9 For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the LORD, they shall inherit the earth.

i pray for my abusers to come to knwo the Lord and be saved we can stand in heaven side by side worshiping the Lord thatwas a hard thing for me to start praying for them i belive me praying for them is when my healing started i rember when God layed it upon my heart to pray fro them a anger rose up with in me i said in my heart you cant be asking me to pray for them with waht they did to me i herd God say i went to the cross for the whole world your sins put me on the cross
i forgive you hard pill to swallow for me Jesus went through far more wors that i did he did it out of love for me and was willing to forgive me he even prayed for them and said Father forgive them they know not what they are doing my first prayer way back like 17 years ago was father forgive them as i choked on the words i put it in a journal with there names to and put those words.all i could get out at the time.it was a start,

[ciny]

I thought this goes with the steps.........................................................................................................

Forgiving does not erase the bitter past.A healed memory in not a deleated memory.Instaed,forgiving what we cannot forget creates a new way to rember.we can can change the memory of our past into a hope for our future.