Christianity Oasis Forum

[aking]

I've written a journal here before but it wasn't because of the 14 day program. So here I go afresh and anew . Today I feel numb, depressed, scared...I'm struggling in life. I'm struggling mentally, physically, spiritually and financially. Some days it seems there is just no hope. About 2 months ago my husband, whom I loved with everything in me, walked out. I had no idea it was coming. I was devastated. From that point on I've wondered what I had done so horribly wrong in my life that the Lord would bring a loving, christian man into my life just to take him out again. I blame myself. I've not been a good christian. I've doubted the Lord, doubted my faith, doubted myself. Not just in that situation by all my life. I was raised by wonderful christian parents and was raised in church. I've memorized bible versus, sang in the church choir, helped with the youth, taught classes. Don't get me wrong, I love the Lord and I'm grateful for the many blessings he's blessed me with and I believe he died on the cross for my sin. My doubts stem from not having enough faith that he will handle things for me. I'm scared I've done way too many bad things in my life and every bad thing that happens to me happens because of my actions. I know that may sound crazy to some, especially coming from a christian. I just seems when my life is going great and I'm happy, there's ALWAYS something that happens eventually to bring me back down. I'm pretty sure the devil has a hand in that but maybe the Lord is punishing me for my fears or my doubts. I don't know. I just hope and pray these 14 steps will help me get my faith and hope back again. I know with the Lord's help ANYTHING is possible.

[xxJILLxx]

Hello amber,

Good to see ya doing the steps.

I am so sorry for all the struggles you have been experiencing. This life we live is full of ups and downs. God doesnt promise us an easy life or a perfect life according to never feeling any hardships or pain. But life with HIm makes our up and down life so much easier to live with HIm by our side. Dont blame yourself for hurtful things that happen to you in this life. We do have to own up to our mistakes we make and live with consequences, but from the sounds of it... i dont think u are to blame for your husband leaving. I dont know all the details of these circumstances but our Lord does and He wants you to heal from your pain. I know you are on the right path in finding that healing here. He loves you, in the next few steps i hope you can begin to realise just how much He does love you.

God bless u on yr journey
♥Jill

[calebsmom77]

((((((((((Amber))))))))))
You remind me a lot of my self sis. The blame game is not a whole lot of fun is it? I want you to remember what Paul said in the book of Romans. Romans 8:1 "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus". Paul also tells us that NOTHING can separate us from the love of God through Christ Jesus our Lord. You could never ever mess up to badly! Never! I find it interesting that you say that every time your life seems to be going great and you are happy that something always brings you down. I want you to think about that statement VERY carefully! I want you to think about why that is. Your answer? It is a tactic of the enemy, sis. He don't want you out there sharing the good news of God's saving grace to the lost. He will do whatever it takes to keep you down so that you can not be useful for the Kingdom of God! You need to remember that "No weapon formed against you shall prosper". Surround yourself with Godly people, have them pray with you and for you. I believe the prayers of the saints will form a hedge of protection around you. Also remember this. I don't remember where it said it, but the bible says, "I am pressed but not crushed, persecuted, not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed". And "the joy of the Lord is your strength". You will be o.k. Continue to cry out to the Lord, for He hears your cries. He loves you and so does everyone here. God bless you sis.

[ciny]

Amber best wishes on your healing journy glad you decide to do the councling steps God hears us when we cry out to him dont give up proud of you

[mlg]

Hello aking,

I think we are often blinded by our own feelings about situations and try to turn them into God's feelings. See God loves us unconditionally, and he forgives us without a second glance when we go to Him and repent of our sins...yet we ourselves have a difficult time of doing for ourselves as God does....we continue to blame ourself for the past...we relive the past over and over...saying could've would've should've...well guess what...reliving the past...keeps you in the past...with all the pain and turmoil...so you have to let go of all the past...and let God...allow Him to make you a new creature in Him...and look forward. Does that mean life will be perfect? No way...the Bible says you will have tribulation in the world...you can't get away from that...but what you can do is build your Faith and learn to walk over the hot coals without burning your feet. You can do this aking...walk the path...and you will see.

Praying for you.

Take care and God Bless

[Ingegrity]

Hi Amber,

I just did my first stepping stone too. I want you to know that God is not punishing you. He punished CHRIST for you because of His great love for you! Things happen b/c we are human and you are right the enemy is the cause of destruction and pain.

Below is a link to Joseph prince. His messages help me to see God's Grace in a brand new light. May God heal your soul and bring you to a joyful peace and a strength of heart.

I will keep you in my thought and prayers. Be sure and check out the link below.

Ingegrity

http://video.search.yahoo.com/search/vi ... eph+prince