Christianity Oasis Forum

[angelbaby]

Family is insane. If I say no I don't want to go one place for a specific reason, I will not want to go to another place for the same reason. It always suppose to be my decision, right. Sure, we will try to guilt trip you into doing what we want. I didn't do what they wanted, but it makes you feel bad because didn't. I really hate being here. I thought it would be two weeks. It hasn't even been half a week. I feel trapped. I am surrounded by family, but I am completely alone.

93 Days!!!

[stillstanding]

love you, sis

Praying for peace and comfort. God's will be done over your summer through work or family or whatever, Amen.

[angelbaby]

Today was not a bad day. Last summer, I worked at Staples. I had a marvelous time there. I dreaded telling them I was leaving to go back to school. The general manger said she would rehire me again for this summer if I wanted to come back. I went to Staples today and spoke with same genral manger. The store was indeed hiring again. She said she was going to check application this morning and look for my application. Basically, I am just waiting for her to call me and set up a time to do the paper work. I will probably call her on Monday. I love my job last summer. I learned a lot about myself, and it was challenging. Most of the battle was not external but interal. I often had to face the realities of what I truly believed about myself and the monster of perfectionism. I truly believe before last summer I had conquered that monster of perfectionism. I have since learned I was lying to myself. I am sure those challenges will once again come foreward as well as other issues, but those issues are not new just issues I have not noticed or ran away from them. Home was not so bad today. For the most part, I stayed in my room to myself. I guess, I gave myself a break from family. Family was still around, but I really didn't engage them so much today. All in all, I think today was a much better day.

[Dora]

Glad it was a better day and that you not only see the issues but are working on them. Proud of you!

[angelbaby]

All I have to say today is 88 days and counting!

[Dora]

I don't know what you go through and won't even pretend to. I do know I've had my share of misery and many months wasted, by my choice. Sure I thought it wasn't me, it was all them.

You can't control them. If they choose to stink let them stink. Don't let their stinking drag you down in the stink with them.

We are asked by God to be more.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

Forgive quickly and laugh often. love you!

[angelbaby]

I am being honest and thankful for your reply piney. I just cannot stand that prayer. I am not even sure why. I know every time I have been to Celebrate Recovery they say that prayer, and I will not join in saying it. Something about that prayer just gets to me every single time. I get really angry at it to be honest. I haven't really figured that out yet.

[Dora]

I see control.

You want control of those around you. To make them do and say and be different. If we get angry and frustrated just enough perhaps they'll change. Perhaps we can make the situation change with our anger.

Overcoming comes in steps.
Step one.....Realize I'm not God. I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and that my life is unmanageable.

You also are powerless over controlling others. Your anger only makes you miserable. Letting go and letting God will not only bring you peace but begins a spiritual process where God can begin changing others with in.

This prayer puts the control in Gods hands. Where it belongs.

We are miserable when we are trying to be in control of our world and others.


Matt. 5:3 Happy are those who KNOW they are spiritually pour.

love you sis....praying for you

[angelbaby]

Actions and Not Promises

Promises, Promises are like vapor in the air
Given and quickly disappearing
Leaving a person stunned
Where did it go?
What happened to it?
There is always a reason
Always an excuse
Promises are nothing but empty air
Actions are the reality of what you can count on

[momof3]

Hi Angel...so glad you are doing the steps again! You can get through this...and being open before God is just what He wants you to do. Ya know, He says that perfect love casts away fear. Angel, this is the way He loves us. Dont be afraid to be totally honest with Him with all of your thoughts, your fears, your imperfections. As I read your post this is what came to mind. Some of us WANT to be perfect..expect ourselves to be perfect for others to see..and we drive ourselves nuts in the process of trying to be something we are not nor can be. We are all human. You know this. You know that only God is perfect. Only Jesus is perfect otherwise we would not need Him as a savior or for anything else. Our comforter and teacher is the Holy Spirit of God...and His sacrifice for us has taken that imperfection in us and pardoned it..only by His grace and love. Through our faith in Jesus, He has made us righteous..not perfect, but forgiven. Angel, no matter how hard you try, how much you beat yourself up for mistakes you have made, sins youve commited...you cant make yourself perfect. You can only choose to believe what God says and Jesus has done for you on the cross. Find freedom and peace in knowing that God KNOWS you/we cannot be perfect but He sent His perfect Son to pay our price. Nothing we can ever do can make up for one sin we have committed. He's already done it.

As to forgiving others..yes, we do have the freedom to choose. Every human on the face of the earth has a choice. We all have the same enemy working against and through us as well...thats part of being human. Forgiving isnt saying what was done to you was right..or fair...but, those who have hurt you..they are human too..and just as imperfect and in need of Jesus as we are. Forgiveness isnt easy but it can be done. Ask the Lord to help you..choose to do so and pray for them. This is how you bless those who curse you. Its also how you love them with His kind of love.

If we didnt have a choice to sin..we wouldnt have a choice to believe what God says, either. Pray sis...He is with you and loves you so very much. He created you the way you are..and loves you with an undying unchangable, unconditional love.

Praying for you as you take this journey...just open your heart to Him.

In Jesus,
love momo