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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby momof3 » Mon Mar 14, 2011 6:43 pm

Hey angelbaby....been a long time! So glad to see you are doing these steps....one day at a time. Sis, as ive read thru your journey journal here ive had to smile...a lil at myself cuz ive seen some of the same things in you that ive seen in me *Halo* Angel...did you know that the Lord uses the lowly..He uses the ones who arent "qualified". He uses our mistakes, He uses our pasts, our hurts, our shortcomings..even our pain..to reach someone else. The Lord says to comfort someone with the same comfort youve been comforted with. I can tell ya if the Lord waited until we were worthy to use us, He would never use us. We are vessels...living and loving Him because of Who He is and what He has done for us..allowing Him to guide us and reach out to those He wants to speak to or reach, through His Spirit. That Holy Spirit lives in you. Its not because of who we are but Who's we are. Its not because of what we've done but cuz of what He has done for us. You, my sister, are His child...created by Him... for Him. Dont listen to the enemy that says you dont qualify for His forgiveness or redemption, or grace....cuz God sure thinks you are...and if Jesus had to die on that cross for you alone, He would have cuz THAT is HIS way of LOVE. Unconditional agape love. Remember, He created you, knowing every step you were ever going to take. Thats what makes it so awesome...that He loves us anyway.

Keep going and know you arent alone in this. Praying for you as you walk along this path. May His perfect will be done in your life.

In Jesus,
love momo *Halo*
James 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby angelbaby » Mon Mar 14, 2011 9:56 pm

Thanks for everyone's responses. It is very hard when this is the first time people have questioned since I was a teenager about my abililties. I do agree that I have things that I need to work on my skills. I am not a social person. I have never been really good it. I also struggle with dealing with criticism. While I do disagree or have some issues with things that were said, I will agree there are some criticisms that have true bearing. I guess these are growing up moments. We all want to say when we hit eighteen year old that we are all grown up. We don't need to learn anything new. I know, I have changed some when I was twenty. I can see some change in last two years as well. I just, I guess again saying growing pains. I am feeling the growing pains of someone pointing out a few of my faults. I just think it was painful of the way it was done. I don't feel as though as was heard. There were no positives only negative. I struggle with how she communicated with me. I still don't understand some of the things she has said and written about me. A part of me wants to go back and discuss what she has sent me. Then again, I am terrified to go back to her after having been hurt so deeply, and I don't feel as though I was heard. I still really upset/angry with her. It is still very emotional, and I still feel like crying when I think of it.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby momof3 » Tue Mar 15, 2011 11:52 am

Hi Angelbaby,

This is one Id pray about. Things are said sometimes that are taken wrong..and then sometimes things are said in a hurtful way...whether they meant to or not. The thing here is to let go of the anger and forgive. You must choose to do this whether or not you ever get an apology. I dont know who you are referring to, but the Lord knows. He also knows both hearts. Ask Him for guidance in this..and to help you to surrender it to Him. What we have to remember is that each and every person ever created has a sinful nature and that we are ALL in need of Jesus and His life-changing grace. Give this to the Lord and let Him be God. Pray for this other soul as well.

Praying for you through this time.

In Jesus,
love momo *Pray*
James 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby deetu » Tue Mar 15, 2011 1:02 pm

Sometimes too, the enemy will twist the way you hear something to keep you from receiving it as it should have been. So you take what they said in offense instead of being able to be open about it. Especially if it was a sore spot to begin with.
Evil likes to twist the truth.

It is so hard when it comes thru in typed words because you cannot see the person's face or hear their voice to know how they are saying something. How many times that has happened when I thought someone said something in jest and was serious or was serious and I took as jest.
Need to keep God close at these times so He can help you know the difference.
*Buddy*

ps I think you are doing great *BigGrin*
It is better to light a candle then curse the darkness *lost*
No fear... just freedom *knight*
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby angelbaby » Tue Mar 15, 2011 5:03 pm

I just want to clarify. I was speaking to his person in her office so I heard the voice reflection and tone.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby dema » Tue Mar 15, 2011 6:38 pm

Anyone who gives an evaluation of anyone should provide more positives than negatives. This isn't always done - but certainly it is one of the most basic of management skills. If a person who does not know this management skill was trying to coach me in how I dealt with people, I would immediately discount their opinions heavily. They still may have valuable information, and I would probably consider it and ask others that I trusted if they thought there was truth in it. However, knowing that this person doesn't know how to do what she is trying to teach me would protect me from being offended.

Angelbaby, you have let me know that you make great grades. Obviously she had no shortage of available positives. Something is wrong with this picture. Maybe she is menopausal or gettting a divorce or something and her harshness has nothing to do with you. However, I know when I was PMSing, the things I said were true - but exaggerated and not presented appropriately. So, please don't totally throw out her advice. Just take it in context.
Hugs,
Dema
Shame and blame are the devil's tools. With God ALL things are possible.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby momof3 » Tue Mar 15, 2011 11:06 pm

Sis, look at the fruits and pray. If the shoe fits it fits......if it doesnt, remember that neither man nor woman defines you. Only God, your creator defines you. Condemnation doesnt come from the Lord. Holy loving conviction does..and out of your love for the Lord, but more of His love for you...you will know the difference. His wont leave you with feeling judged...He will call to your spirit a need to see something and allow Him to change it in you. Like I said earlier...we are all in need of Jesus. He alone changes us. Take what was said to Him in prayer and let Him show you those things He wants to do in you. Let the rest roll off your shoulders like a duck in water. His opinion is what matters. Pray, sis. Let Him lead you.

In Jesus,
love momo *Halo*
James 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby angelbaby » Wed Mar 16, 2011 2:56 am

So glad to see you are doing these steps


I quit doing the steps a long time ago.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I should do related to this matter. I have come to some decisions. Maybe, the decision will meet the expectations.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby momof3 » Wed Mar 16, 2011 7:26 am

angelbaby wrote:
So glad to see you are doing these steps


I quit doing the steps a long time ago.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I should do related to this matter. I have come to some decisions. Maybe, the decision will meet the expectations.


Can't make ya do the steps. You have to want the change and peace the Holy Spirit has for you. Im praying for you, though. Just remember, His thoughts toward you are not the same as your thoughts towards you. Keep posting. We are here for you.

in Jesus,
love momo *Halo*
James 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby angelbaby » Mon Apr 18, 2011 11:19 pm

The Nightmare

Standing in front of a door
Unwilling to go in
Knowing full well the Nightmare that lies within
Praying to God the door does not open
But knowing full well the door will soon open
Then the Nightmare will be unleashed
All alone in the darkness with the Nightmare again
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby Dora » Tue Apr 19, 2011 7:09 am

I can relate to that. :)

Can I suggest you begin to talk to God about that door and what lies behind it, if you haven't been. Not just talk, but listen and feel Him. Find a safe and secure place with in where He resides and spend time focusing on that Holy space while He shows you that He is love, that He is gentle, that He cares, that He is kind. And so much more. It makes this door opening process less painful, less *eek* and you can move through it faster.

God loves ya and so do I!!! *run*

*hug*
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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Re: Angel's Journal

Postby deetu » Tue Apr 19, 2011 9:41 pm

Maybe your prayer should be for God to help you and lead you thru the nightmare so that it is no longer dark.
Keep Jesus close and you will never be alone. A little bit of darkness does nothing to the light but a little bit of light dispells the darkness... even open your cell phone in a movie theater *BigGrin*
It is better to light a candle then curse the darkness *lost*
No fear... just freedom *knight*
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