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Forgiving myself to receive His Grace...rough one Day 3

Postby Guest » Thu Sep 16, 2010 8:13 pm

Receiving Grace is an especially hard concept for me... I have hardly even in life gotten anything without almost killing myself in hard work to get it. Not wordly things like a job or material items...but emotional. I have never had anyone love me and just pour Grace on me because of that. I turn into the most awkward person around when someone so much as gives me a small compliment. I would immediately start thinking, "Do they want something? Are they being sarcastic?" I know now that was Satan in my head. I need to learn to just smile and say, "thank you, you made my day" because isn't that what grace is? Outpouring of little surprises you weren't anticipating. The other MAJOR reason I have such a hard time receiving Grace is because I haven't forgiven myself. I haven't released burden from my own heart....until tonight. God wispered this in my mind tonight as I was finishing reading Stone 3 (FOR THE FIRST TIME, I RECOGNIZED TRUTH COMING FROM HIM, INSTEAD OF LISTENING TO THE ECHOS OF SATAN...IM ECSTATIC!!!)

I have 2 small boys, the loves of my life. Although I discipline them for their own good, there is nothing they could do to make me love them any less. One of them could do something that burns the house down, and make me completely furious, but the moment they look up at me with those beautiful blue eyes and say, "mommy, I sorry" it all fades away. I scoop them up in my arms, hug them, kiss them and tell them it will be ok and we will figure it out, not to worry, I love them more then anything. Hello!!!!! Why has it taken me this long to realize that is how God looks at me????? lol I mean, it doesn't get any clearer then that.

So although I may disappoint from time to time, or muck something up, I just need to turn my head to him and say, "Father, I'm truly sorry I've let you down, I WILL do better. I HAVE learned from my mistake(s). and I WILL make you proud of me.

I just can't even believe the things made possible through this site. I'm sititng here in pure amazement at the success that reading something for 35 minutes a night is bringing to my relationship with God, which makes my heart just want to explode out of my chest at the fact that I HAVE A FATHER WHO LOVES ME TO ALL ENDS. lol Did that sentence just come out of my mouth....I HAVE A FATHER THAT LOVES HIS DAUGHTER TO ALL ENDS, UNCONDITIONALLY, FAITHFULLY, ETERNALLY!!! Not that I want to die anytime soon, but oh will I absolutely burst at the seems the first time I'm able to wrap my arms around Him and just be with Him.
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thanks

Postby living4Him » Thu Sep 16, 2010 10:26 pm

I just did day 2 today......still struggling with similiar issues and you have made me eager to do tomorrows lesson....thanks for being encouraging!
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Postby momof3 » Fri Sep 17, 2010 9:50 am

Hi Amis...and welcome to Oasis. Wow! What a taste of God's grace you have seen in the love you have for your children. Whats more is that His love is perfect..and even deeper and more unconditional than the love He has given us for our children.

If love is kind, love is pure, love expects nothing for herself, and is patient and is longsuffering..and forgives 70 times 7...these are words from Jesus, himself...if He wants us to love this way, how much more is the maker of Love Himself able to love us? The word says that His passion was to die for us so that we could be given that perfect Grace. It wasnt done halfway on the cross. His grace IS sufficient. The hardest part is being able to get past the poison arrows the enemy shoots into our carnal minds, using our past experiences and sins to say He can only forgive so much. This just simply isnt what His Grace is. It is awesome and underserved and unending. He remembers our trespasses no more according to His word. This is where faith comes in.

Im so glad the Lord has shown you this through your love for your children. Sit and revel in His love and forgiveness. This is where life is. Will be praying for you as you continue along this path. May His perfect love and forgiveness reach the core of your soul, my sister in Him.

in Jesus,
luv momo *Halo*
James 4:10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
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Postby deetu » Fri Sep 17, 2010 9:54 am

Woo Hoo Amis, everyday is a lot brighter for you. You are seeing faster then most because you are so willing to let things fall into place.

When I first started reading your post, the thought came into my mind that for you to feel less selfconscious of compliments to yourself, you should start complimenting others. Just even smile at people and you will see a difference. Knowing that you have no other motive other then spreading cheer will help you understand and hold on to it for yourself.

Mother's love is strong but God's love is stronger.
Isn't it great?
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It is better to light a candle then curse the darkness *lost*
No fear... just freedom *knight*
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so very true

Postby Guest » Fri Sep 17, 2010 8:14 pm

You know....I do not know how fast or slow people are changed on this program, but I do know that I have been waiting for 28 very long years for this. For a Father, for guidance, for love, for hope, for stability, for peace, for happiness, for grace, for forgiveness, for that void to be filled. So when you have literally struggled on for 28 years waiting for something and then you finally get it....you aren't going to let it pass you by! I don't know the exact verses, but I've heard several a sermon on the blessings given to those who wait....WHEW....He has something PHENOMENAL planned for me!
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Postby xxJILLxx » Sat Sep 18, 2010 8:06 am

*Cheer3*

Cheering you on!

God bless

♥Jill
♥♥I strive to love others as Christ loves me... Ephesians 5:1 Be imitators of God therefore as dearly loved children and live a life of love...♥♥
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Postby Smiles » Sat Sep 18, 2010 10:40 am

WOW Amis!!!!

I just read your post and all I can say is that I'm sitting here rejoicing!!!! I am overjoyed at what God is doing in your heart and in your life!!!!

And WOW!!!! you did such an amazing job of communicating God's love and God's mercy and God's grace!!!!! How much He loves us that truly "Nothing can separate us from the love of God!" That He loves us unconditionally. That He is love!!! WOW!!! I am bubbling over here!!!!

I hope that many read your post and say to themselves, "WOW!!! He loves me!!!"
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THANK YOU!!!!!

Postby Guest » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:50 pm

I wanted to take a quick minute and let everyone know....I log on these forums several times a day, and while I also read other posts, I read everyone's replies to mine the most. You all pour out the most amazing encouragement, and love, and understanding....it has really made me push harder and harder to be able to soak in all this is being given.

Thank You, and GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!!!
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Postby mlg » Sat Sep 18, 2010 1:12 pm

There it is Amis! Seeing the Light shed on the Truth...God has loved you all along when you thought no one did...it's just that we were too busy listening to everyone else...people, ourselves, the enemy...instead of really being still and hearing God...and now that you are taking the time to sit down and be still...well...a revelation has appeared :) I'm so happy for you.

Keep it up...you are doing great!

luv ya
Do you know my Jesus? Do you know my friend? Have you heard He loves you? If not, I'd like to introduce you.
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Postby Dora » Sat Sep 18, 2010 1:20 pm

it has really made me push harder and harder to be able to soak in all this is being given.

That right there is reward enough for me. :) Hearing this blessed me. Praying for you.
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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