Christianity Oasis Forum

[harmonizer]

Thank you all, again, for chating and posting. It's helping me along.

I'd like to share a little more and hopfully clarify somethigs. I know I'm venting but please bare with me.

My wife and I both are seeking God's purpose for us during this season. I'm going to try and explain how I got to this point. In short, I felt overwhelmed finacially because I was support my family alone. I didn't mine at first, but I got stressed out because literally, when my wife stopped working 3 years ago, I wasn't able to carry around 20$ guest to have. God sustained us, but dept still piled up. Not only that, my job was stressing me out. I wasn't happy. The real reason was that I didn't feel that I was operating and doing what God had called me to do. Not only that, but my school district was and still is going through...like the rest of the world. Budget cuts, threats about job losses, partents acting a fool, the whole nine yards. So in all, I was dealing with job stress and finacial stress and I was not happy. To be very honest, I had NO intensions of going back to school. God knows I telling the truth! No desire AT ALL! I prayed and asked God about the situation. My wife and I discussed things and talked about how God has a way of getting us to move when He wants us to. It's kinda like Him shaking our nest to make us fly. He make's it so unconfortable untill we have to move. Not to mention that our pastor was preaching about "going to the next level".

My first action was to transfer to another school (middle school because I had had enough of high school). I had have away of hearing understand what God wanted; so, I told him that if I didn't get the middle school job and an elementary job instead, that was my 'sign" that he was directing me back to school. Sure enough, I was placed at an elementary school. (Which I really wsn't my first choice) I spent one year at the school and went to persue school the next. My wife and I talked and talked and disagreed, and disagreed. At this point I'd love to share another experience that I had with God at our church's campmeeting. Now our church is very radical and on fire for the Lord. It's an assembly of God, but my pastor is fully pentacostal! It is that experience, the prayer I prayed after the experience, and a VERY SPECIFIC message that he preached one Sunday. If it wasn't for that series of events, I would have not gone and tried to persue school. That experience is what I'm hurting and not understanding about God. I'm not running FROM Him but TO Him to understand what's going on.

My wife just says that I went to the wrong school and wrong place. It very weird but this is where I am. Hurt, confused, scared, but seeking and trying to understand and regain focus and repair my life. Trully, I believe God sees the whole picture and is in control, but brothers and sisters, it's scary. God bless all of you that reply. Sorry I'm typing too much, but I love God and I have to have my relationship with Him...

[lizzie]

hello again brother

Vent away my friend, get it all out there, its part of the healing process. So dont worry bout talkin too much or too little or anything like that. You just share whats on your heart, we are here for ya

As I was reading what you wrote, I kept hearing this scripture in my head

Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

That last part there is so crucial to this scripture's Truth. To those who are the called to His purpose. And my brother that you are. Therefore, whatever you did in your past, whatever choice u made, whatever it is that has brought you HERE, God will use it all, for good if you stay in Him.

We must be very careful not to become so caught up on what we did in our past, that we neglect to see or hope for the future God still has for us. I mean what can we really change in our past? Not a thing. Not a second can be redone. What has been said has been said, what has been done has been done. And to spend valuable time wondering IF we shoulda coulda woulda etc is gonna take away from that which God has for you NOW.

Where are you NOW? What can you do for God NOW? What is He leading you towards NOW?

You said it yourself... You Love God.

My brother? God loves you right back plus infinity times eternity You havent ruined anything. You havent thwarted God's plan for your life. You MAY have taken a lil step off the path here and there, dont we all... but God's plan and purpose for your life is still what it has always been. He is, as you wonderfully stated, in control.

GBU and lookin fwd to your next post.

[momof3]

Hi harmonizer

wanted to say that i echo everything lizzie has said here. I too, can look back and see all the decisions ive made..some were mistakes..mis-steps, if you will..but, i can also see where even through those mistakes, God knowing what i was going to do, He still made a way. He knew what i was going to do and even when i thought i was doing the Lord's will and wasnt, He still turned things around for for me, leading me through those valleys for His greater good. It took some time, cuz He wanted to show me so many things along the way...the greatest being His capability to sustain me and those in my family. He used the people around me to help, to show, and to grow me. He used my own mistakes to show me that He really is in control..when i thought my life was so out of control. Theres a song that says.." Youre up to something bigger than me, something Heavenly" It talks about how things seem to be so chaotic...and even though the Lord doesnt bring chaos to our lives, we do, He is working through it and we need only to be still and watch what He is doing, trusting that He is in control. When its time to move, He will show you and open the doors for you. During that chaos, you will feel an underlying peace..that place He is leading you into now. Keep going brother, you arent alone in this. You are right where He wants you at this time. Be still in this and know that He is God. He is in control and you need only to keep surrendering everything to Him and His will for you.

God bless you, brother. Praying for you and your family.

in Jesus,
momo