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A lonely place this side of Eden

Postby josinella » Fri Oct 16, 2009 8:17 pm

Being closer to Him, discerning His path can be a lonely place this side of Eden. The mission field is wide open: many among the lost souls, a lot of hurting, lonely and misguided among the saved. Overwhelmed by need, He has directed me to take a brief hiatus to heal and replenish.

Guiding me every step of the way, I willingly accept His call to service: youth leadership, peer facilitation and christian writing. Writing for Him (for me) is a tremendous task because I have to clear my mind and heart of my intentions only to reflect His desires: to reach those who seek Him and those who are unsaved. Our relationship with Him, once committed, is a living covenant that develops throughout life, full of trials & tribulations, blessings & joys, wisdom & encouragement, praise & rejoicing, devotion with Him.

As believers we concentrate so much on sin & redemption, not enough on His first gift: God's perfect love and communion with Him. We get a glimpse of it in Genesis prior to the Fall but He loves us enough to give us many second chances. Why can't we be this accepting of one another? Why do we only see fault in one another? How closely does our faithwalk approximate the love of the Father? What does it mean to be Christ-like? Where do we read where Jesus was belittleling, condemning, judgmental? The bar is raised so high, people are driven out of and not to the body of Christ (church).

By loving ourselves (committing and devoting our lives to Him) we can then love others as He would have us do. His first gift, His perfect love and communion with Him can be experienced if we truly seek Him, meaning being totally bare (naked) as we were in the Garden of Eden, totally stripped of our worldly desires & intentions, seeking only Him. His love has really tempered my soul and brought new meaning to my life. I want to fellowship with others so that they come to know Christ and receive His first gift.
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Postby mlg » Fri Oct 16, 2009 8:44 pm

Hey josinella sis *hug* it's been awhile, but it's sure nice to hear from you.

Yes the mission field is a difficult path...but I'll tell ya, if you are called to it, you have a love within you that burns to reach out. You hear the cries of the lost souls, yelling endlessly in your own heart.

But...as you just said, we also need to take time to refresh and sit in God's love. Like a reminder of why He has chosen you to receive His love...just because you are His child...He loves you :) Beautiful!

Have missed you.

luv ya
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Postby josinella » Sat Oct 17, 2009 7:25 pm

I love you and missed you too, mlg1279.

I accept God's calling, I sense the need of those around me, now, knowing that God brought me to this timeout to focus & direct me. In the past, I would have trudged along, well beyond my threshold until I reached an anger point. God is working on me to love myself, to allow Him to work through me, and not to take responsibility for what He has directed me to do.

You are right mlg1279, I do "hear" the cries of lost souls and was overwhelmed by it. But God is taking directorship of my energies so that His will can be fulfilled. It definitely is a different experience. Lots of tears shead in the last 24hrs, allowing Him to show me how I have let things affect me. He has allowed me to see what my anger is really about: how cruel & judgmental people can really be, unwilling to love one another and help others when called to. He is showing me what "it" (sin) is in others. Before, I would have internalized this anger and tried to fix things myself. I feel like He is preparing me for battle, the people I am talking about are other believers.

In order for us to bring lost souls into the ship (church) out of the sea of sin, our crew has to be prepared and ready. Lots of work to do, it seems as though He is directing me into the calm, to build me up, to put on the Full Armor of God. I am scared, it is a new direction. I thought that I would just be talking to people about God but there is a real Spiritual battle going on that people are oblivious about. I hope to be stronger in the Lord soon. Sometimes, like Moses, I feel ill equipped for the job.
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Postby Dora » Sat Oct 17, 2009 8:08 pm

Enjoyed you post Josi. :)

Just stopping by to give you this *hug*
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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Postby josinella » Sat Oct 17, 2009 8:18 pm

XOXO to you too, Pine!
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Postby mlg » Sat Oct 17, 2009 9:35 pm

Josinella you said it sis...there is a real Spiritual Battle going on all around us all the time. And often we are intermixed in this battle, especially if we love Jesus, because the enemy attacks us to get to Him within us. The battle nonetheless is not just for our soul, but for all the souls that He might reach through us. If the enemy can get us to falter for just one minute, he not only captures us...but all those other hurting souls that we might have touched. Keep fighting the good fight always sis.

luv ya bunches
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The Holy Spirit

Postby josinella » Sun Oct 18, 2009 9:26 pm

The Holy Spirit has come into my life in a big way. Recommitting myself to God was the first step and allowing the in-dwelling of the Holy Spirit, the second. By allowing the Spirit in, I have come to know how loving and protective the Holy Spirit is. I don't need anyone else.

This is going to seem unusual, but sometimes it is scary. I don't actually hear a voice but I discern His presence and a sense of direction for my life. If I follow His path, my life is so much the better. My faith gets stronger the more I follow Him. He fills me with His wisdom about His purpose & calling for me. It is scary because I am unsure of myself, I have to trust His judgment. But it is getting easier, I question less, I get nervous less, I respond quicker and I see His purpose so much more.

The more I do for Him, the more He loves me because He asks me to do more for His will. This is the most positive I have felt in my life. I follow, not only for Salvation's sake but just because I love Him so much. That's enough for me. Sometimes, I think it is more important just to love Him and do things for Him out of love, not for what I am going to get from Him. God knows that I have had a hard life, and I have been bitter about it. But I know it was all for His will to be done, He has made it all worthwhile!
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Postby mlg » Sun Oct 18, 2009 11:46 pm

Anytime we begin something new, we often find a sense of fear. The reason being as the unknown seems fearful. But...when the Holy Spirit is the one calling us to something, we can Trust that He will not harm us, and whatever new task He is asking us to do...He will be there to teach us the ropes.

The Holy Spirit is our comforter, and our guidance. He lives within us, and this brings about an intimate relationship with Him. We can dig deep and find everything we need is already within.

luv ya sis
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Step 5

Postby josinella » Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:32 pm

I have a sadness, a pit in my soul, if you will. It is hard for me to consider Salvation, much less view it as a reward for following Him when I am so preoccupied with the goings on in this world. Everywhere I go, all I see is works that needs to be done. The mission field is wide open.

I follow God because of the spiritual connectedness I have with Him. When I chose to allow Him in my life fully, I sensed a joy, a gladness Heaven sent. He has always been with me, He gave me talents to get me through my early life. When I took my place in life after college, things were not the way I hoped they would be in the world. I turned my back on Him because of the circumstances of my life. I regret that, I could have enjoyed many years of happiness with Him, fulfilling His will, instead of being dead to Him.

He is working with me now, to love myself more, strengthening me and guiding me. I realize with abuse, Satan has done a number on me and I will fight his demon while in this world. I have trouble accepting people and letting them in but God is teaching me self love. He is very loving with me & protective, and with such love, I need none other. His spiritual presence is my reward.

Accepting His calling was not hard, just what He has called me to is difficult. And it seems He raises the bar with every task. I have been asked if He is calling me to the ministry. I feel that He is calling me to assist the ministry of one who will hopefully fulfill His calling. I never thought that my life would go the way He is leading me. But it is a much better place then where I have come from.

His spiritual presence is my reward! I pray that He will bring me to a place of understanding the sadness in my soul.
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Postby mlg » Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:45 pm

Hey sis,

I often find myself with a sense of sadness for the lost souls of the world. They go through life with a void, seeking to fulfill it with things of the world, and often still remain empty. That's because they don't know Jesus, and they seek for what they aren't finding. This is why God needs workers to show these souls the way to Jesus.

Yes God wants to use you in His ministry, but He needs you to totally trust Him as well. It's good to see you working on growing in Him, so that you can build that trust, and then He can place you in the perfect job within His ministry.

Keep absorbing His love.

luv ya sis
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Postby Dora » Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:51 pm

I realize with abuse, Satan has done a number on me and I will fight his demon while in this world.


Though it is a spiritual battle God has already won it. Surrender to Christ and allow him to fight it for you.

Matthew 11:30
For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

It is wonderful to see the you walking with the Lord and hear of what he's doing with you and for you. :)
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Postby Dora » Wed Oct 21, 2009 3:32 pm

Accepting His calling was not hard, just what He has called me to is difficult. And it seems He raises the bar with every task.


Josi this reminds me of something that I recently learned. I'm taking guitar lessons and last night the instructor began teaching me how to hold down two strings at one time, Reeeeeeeeeally stretching my hand. I couldn't do it. I thought, impossible. My hands are to small. :( I thought I can't do this, I may have to give it up.

She kept encouraging me and I kept trying. It's still difficult but I'm getting it. More practice and more STRETCHING and it will be a cinch. ;) And I'll be closer to making music.

Sis the stretching hurts. With time and practice you'll get it through the help of the Lord, your instructor, sitting beside you showing you how to do this. He's proud of you. :)
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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