Christianity Oasis Forum

[Bristollayne]

Today I identified my problem. I stated that I have doubt that God will come through and I am selfish. Through the other steps that I have already completed, I have began to have less and less doubt in God. I love this! I have decided to verbally and spiritually forgive my exhusband. I am working on forgiving my parents and my older brother. My husband finally apoligized to me for the way our marriage started out with and for all the deciet and lies. I am doing my best on guiding him back to God every chance I get. Giving God credit is hard for him. I don't take that lightly. I am happy with the progress and the help and hope this forum has given me the last four steps. Thank you!

May God Bless you in thing seen and unseen!
~Bristollayne

[dema]

Blaming yourself for everything isn't the right thing to do - I know you are working on forgiveness - so you are acknowledging that you were hurt. But there is a tendency when you are hurt to take on lots of the blame when it isn't yours. The reason for this is that if it was your fault, then you can prevent it in the future.

The truth is that you are an adult now. And God can protect you as an adult. Children are under the beliefs of the parents. But you are an adult now. We are all selfish. The saints among us learn to act for others and not act on their own selfishness when it is inappropriate. But sometimes you need to be giving to yourself. Love your neighbor AS YOURSELF.

Many survivors of abuse won't do for themselves what they do for their children. Sometimes they are quite extreme. Bake a cake every night for dinner, but never have any. Everybody else gets to ride the rides, but not them.....

You deserve life too.

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness and ALL THESE THINGS will be added unto you.

God wants you to be giving, but you also need to be receiving. Let people be blessed by giving to you.

[Bristollayne]

Dema,

I am so glad that God has brought you into my life. I believe He is using you as an instrument to keep me on the path that He is guiding me on. I have woken up with a smile on my face for an entire week! I am bubbly with entusiasm for Christ! I just hope that bubbles over to others :-)

I'm trying to learn to not blame myself. I am learning to forgive myself. Forgiving someone else really does take the stress off of ones soul. I can think clearer and feel more loving. It is a great feeling!!!!

Thanks so much,
~Bristollayne

[Shan]

Hi Bristollayne,

I pray that you continue to grow in the wisdom and knowledge of God by the power of His Holy Spirit.

When you are doubting remember God is worthy of your trust. He deserves our trust by who He is and what He has shown of Himself to us and for us. There is none worthy but Him.

It's very easy to doubt ourselves also when we have let ourselves down many times due to our sinful nature. It's good you've found these steps to help you in the journey to trusting God & yourself, it will help. Thank you God!

I too was sexually abused at a young age. I know some of what you're going through. You're experiencing so many feelings and emotions right now. Try very hard to take things baby step by baby step, it's very easy to want to rush through because you're "feeling" good right now, you "feel" you finally found some help but the truth is feelings change and you might have to repeat the healing path/stepping stones over. Personally, I have found a journal to be very helpful because I can say the things to my abuser in my journal that I wouldn't say in person or to anyone else but God. It's so extremely painful to walk through those memories of the abuse that happened, sometimes more then we can handle. I pray you allow the Holy Spirit to become your best friend and never walk the road alone again.


In Christ,
Shan