Christianity Oasis Forum

[InQuestofAwe]

I understand grace and mercy in theory but my heart struggles with accepting forgiveness as a reality. I believe it for other people, I just can't imagine a life without guilt and rage, I've tried for years and though I get brief moments of spiritual lucidity I always lose it, it feels like my spirit is too tired to stay awake, and my flesh can't make since of whats going on. I want to forgive I really really do. unforgiveness is an exhausting ugly thing to hold on to, it's disfiguring. I just feel like it's super glued to my hands. I tell myself I forgive them and I try to move on but then I have these awful dreams about reliving everything. I care about these people I don't want them to know I haven't forgiven them I don't want them to suffer but the pain and anger won't go away. In most cases they don't even know they hurt me. as for forgiving myself? I am completely overwhelmed by that. I don't even know how to process the idea of it. It sounds nice...
ps I didn't do 2 days at once I just didn't know what to say about yesterday until today.

[Mackenaw]

Hello Inquestofawe,

God bless you this day.

If your understanding of grace still feels like a theory, then hang on to it through obedience, and trust The Lord and the work of The Holy Spirit within you to take it from your head to your heart.

Don't shut down the hope, or blow out the flame of hope, that is flickering in you. Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

Again, trust in the work that The Holy Spirit is doing within you. He's got this.

The more you learn about The Lord through submission to Him and reading HIs Word, the stronger your new life in Christ (eternal life) grows. And as you become stronger in the your new life in Him, the weaker your old man/woman becomes. The sanctification process is a process...it takes time. Trust Him, He knows what He is doing.

Much of those old memories have ghost emotions attached to them. When they say "Boo", remind yourself that you are a child of God through the bloodshed of Jesus, and you no longer bow to your emotions, memories or any other thing that deems to lord over you, except God Himself: God The Father, God The Son and God The Holy Spirit. Jesus Christ is your Lord and Saviour.

Prayers are rising to our Lord in the name of Jesus on your behalf. May God's blessed will be done.

God bless and keep you.
In Christ Jesus' love,
Sister Mack

[dema]

When children aren't taught a sense of worth, then they have troubles with things like this. Consider your daughter. Considre yourself looking at you through mother's eyes. It will help you to realize the injustice of not being cherished. When you learn that God cherishes you as you cherish your daughter, then things will start to change.

You are welcome to continue to write me. Hugs.

[Christianity Oasis]

Wow, wow, wow ...

If'n I could take the true essence of Mackster and Dema and scramble it the way they do the lotto ...

It would be a winning number every time ...

Luv both of ya

[InQuestofAwe]

Thank you so much for your words of wisdom and encouragement. God made it easy fro me. He said what I've seen of people and what they've seen of me isn't His perfect truth. I can't see their hearts the way He can but if I could I'd know they were beautiful enough to die for so I have to love them because His heart broke for love of them and He died loving them and rose to love them and I don't want to hold anything against something that precious. I can't think of Him dying and act like it wasn't worth it. I hope I hold on to this revelation. Please pray that I remember.

[Shan]

Your heart is changing, praise the Lord. When we seek God, we find the TRUTH. Don't worry about forgetting this revelation ask God to write it on the tablet of your heart instead and then believe that He has. Remember, Jesus said it your faith that has saved you. Keep pressing forward, praying for you.

In Christ,
Shan