Christianity Oasis Forum

[angelafaith55]

Hello dear brothers and sisters in christ my name is Angelica and I have a problem that I don't understand. All I can do is explain what happens to me. First I love to read romance books when I read these books I get so much into them that I start to fantasize that I am in this world. In this world I become the heroine, the star and I make the characters do what I want them to do. While I am fantasizing I am also listening to worldly music. In my mind I recreate the whole romance novel with me as the star. Also when the romance novel has a love scene I stop the fantasy and go into pornography. I will get on my computer and look for women being sexually abuse by men. I have become aware that the pornography has become more and more worst. I look at porn of men with men. When I am not saf with pictures I read about rape. At the end when I feel satisfy I start all over again. Read the romance novel = fantasy=love scene= pornography= rape. And while I am doing all these things
I can't face God because its three days with God reading the bible prying, but than I start the fantasy all over. I just don't understand can anyone out there help me.

[TrueAndMagneticNorth]

Hi angela,

Your struggle with the ways of the world is very normal for literally all people. The difference between a person of The Lord, and someone else, is how one reacts to it.

In 2 Timothy 2:22 Paul writes, “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”

If there are things that one is exposed to that inspire such passions, the bible is clear that we must cut it out. Even if there is no initial intention to sin, if there is something that can later inspire one to sin, it must be removed. One such example is television.

One might flick on the TV with no intention of sinning, but then while channel hopping, might come across something he or she initially didn't plan on watching; something perhaps inappropriate for Christians to watch. Before too long the person might be watching it, brushing it off as a once-off thing, and then having immoral thoughts as a result.

The bible mentions in many parts that the enemy lays such snares deliberately to hook people who initially may have had no intetion to sin (mentioned several times in Psalms, for example, 119:10, 140: 4-5, 142:3). It could well be that you have no intention of sinning at all when you start reading such books, but that the whole process is all pre-planned by our very real enemy, with the ultimate goal of luring you into sinful thoughts.

My advice, for what it's worth, would be this: seek to eliminate the sin at the source. If it's too hard to stop reading romance novels altogether, make a small step first, such as first finding out if a particular romance novel would be family friendly, before buying or borrowing it. If it is not, don't get it. If it's too hard too know for sure, have a pre-reading plan of action in place, so you know how to react if you suddenly realize the enemy has laid a snare, eg. at the first sign of sexually explicit content, it HAS TO be thrown out.

Regarding the worldly music, it's not necessarily bad just because it's 'worldly', but you first need to consider if it's harmless and instils peace in you, or if, like so much worldly music these days, it numbs the mind with mindless talentless sounds and lyrics, not to mention inappropriate messages, and if it's being inflicted on you by the sort of new world order tools that literally populate the pop 'music' scene.

A lot to consider, I know, and we're all having such battles in our walk with The Lord. It was never meant to be easy. All He wants from you/us is that we fight the good fight, continue to acknowledge sin and continue to seek His help.

I will pray for you and urge you to keep coming back here to see what other people have to say and let us know how everything is going. God bless you.

[vahn]

Hello Angelica , welcome to the Oasis .

As I was reading your post , it took me back to the times when , having "nothing" to do (experiencing emptiness) , I would "create or make things up just to keep myself "entertained" , BUT , because of that very emptiness , I had no starting point . So , what do I do ?

I'd smoke a joint to help me come up with something . Then , I'd take a couple of drinks to get the courage to do it , followed by cocaine to "look good" doing it !

After the crash "landing" , realizing my foolishness , ridden with all sorts of shame and guilt and what have you , I'd turn to God (the only one left to turn to after the escapade) and pray with all my might !

Yeah , like ... pray for more money for me to be able to do it all over again !!!

Where is my main issue ? EMPTINESS , and not knowing , or have not been shown any other way to fill that gap with other than FANTASY .

No , I am not an addict at all !

Luv ya
In Christ , our Lord
vahn