Christianity Oasis Forum

[deafeningsilence]

Today has been a little better than yesterday and the day before. I did make a mistake and drink today but starting over.

I realize that most of everything I do in life is based off fear and self seeking. I just haven't ever understood the need for others help you know. Yeah someone gave me a good lecture today on self seeking and how it was starting to become dangerous for me. I didn't even realize it I guess. I just have always felt like if something needs to be done I need to do it, I can do things on my own... blah blah blah... but it seems God didn't make us as solitary beings... We desire communication, love, friendship, relationships etc. We desire to be with or near others.

I did a lot of research on it and seems this person is right. Then of course they got mad because I did research on it instead of just believing them because that shows I still don't trust them or what they have to say. I'm trying to learn I really am but seem people really just need to be patient... but it's all cool I can't fix them, or control them... I can only control myself, which I don't seem to be doing that great of a job at either.

So my main thing for today... I feel like God is asking me if I'm through with me yet... Am I through being my own god? Am I through thinking I can do everything on my own? Am I through trying to hide or run away? Am I through with me?

That answer is to be determined...

[sovern1982]

well i agree with you on alot of what u said when u were talking about fear and self seeking...but i dont think god is asking you the questions...i think you're asking yourself those questions and he is waiting for you to decide. its just my opinion and i could be full of crap but something you might think on. god bless you and see you through your troubled time

[momof3]

I did a lot of research on it and seems this person is right. Then of course they got mad because I did research on it instead of just believing them because that shows I still don't trust them or what they have to say. I'm trying to learn I really am but seem people really just need to be patient... but it's all cool I can't fix them, or control them... I can only control myself, which I don't seem to be doing that great of a job at either.

So my main thing for today... I feel like God is asking me if I'm through with me yet... Am I through being my own god? Am I through thinking I can do everything on my own? Am I through trying to hide or run away? Am I through with me?

That answer is to be determined...

Hi Deafeningsilence. God bless you, my sister in Jesus.

Ya know, one thing the bible teaches is to test the spirit against the word of God. When someone counsels me on something I always check it against what God says. If the person counseling me is bothered by that, that is something between them and the Lord..afterall, words of wisdom come from the Lord thru the person...not from the person, himself.

Sister, I believe the kind of control you are looking for is the ability to deliver yourself from certain addictions. We all have some sort of illness or addiction..they just come under different labels. We are all sick. He alone can heal us and deliver us from whatever addiction we might have. Giving control to the Lord says that you are helpless to heal yourself.

We are born selfish. We do things and react certain ways out of that selfishness and alot of times we dont even realize we are being selfish. These are the areas the Lord changes in us as we grow in Him. Are we ever totally selfless? No...but one day at a time, He grows us..and heals us..and delivers us. By His stripes we are healed..that is through Him we are delivered and healed from our sicknesses daily, until the day we are completely delivered from this life to spend eternity with Him.

God bless you on this journey. I know He has much to show you. He loves you with every ounce of His being....unconditionally.

In Jesus,
love momo

[Lani]

Hey ds

My luvly healing sis...
Let me start with, DAY 5!!!!

I have been reading your posts through each step and sis, I have to say your words share healing and growth. I know it doesn't feel like it but when I think back to our first conversations in chat sis you have already come a good distance. I imagine what lies ahead in steps to come will only build on this awesome breakthrough.

(research, I agree completely with what momo shared on this topic)

"That answer is yet to be determined..."

Really? Seems the answer lies in the last 4 steps, in this one, and in the ones waiting to be discovered. Sis, you HAVE chosen to seek answers outside yourself and you are now working on growing closer to God. That journey started the day you Google "Christian Chat" and in that moment God rejoiced and now we are blessed by the opportunity to join you on this journey toward healing and wholeness. May the days ahead bring continued healing and comfort.

Let me also YAY! with ya over the choice to push through confusion to continue to find and grow in His truth. cruddy likes to toss in a few seeds of confusion in an effort to CONvince us we mustn't be doin something right or worse... we are on the wrong path. You see sis, as you find HEALING through God, cruddy gets uneasy and starts grabbin anything he can to try to dissuade you from the path with HIS light. darkness cannot dwell in Light so cruddy does what he can to cast a few shadows.

As for "mistake"... can we determine at what point (in the future) you can take action to prevent this choice from occuring. A suggestion, if I may Next time ya feel overwhelmed by all that has come your way (cuz ya will) stop, take a few deep breathes and find something else to focus on. Whether that is comin into chat to type with a few of His O family, listen to some praise music, read your Bible, take a look at some of the other forum posts and share as ya feel led, or if environment allows go for a walk.

In a time when my choices were limited and I felt overwhelmed, a dear soul suggested I take a chapter of Proverbs (referred to then as the "fortune cookie messages" of the Bible)... Gotta LOVE the fact that there are 31 Chapters... coincidence? you decide

It has been an honor to walk with ya thus far sis, please know even when one doesn't post several are walking with you.
Prayers remain always.



Peace n Luv in Christ,
Lani

[Ingegrity]

I am proud of you! God is speaking to you! I have no doubt! He speaks to us all in a way we can hear as individual personalities.

Keep up the good work and Keep the faith!



Ing