Christianity Oasis Forum

[kimby]

I have followed the direction I think He is leading. I said no to interviewing with the second school. Of course now the panic has set in. The voices in my head screaming, "Call him back!" The fear of what if I have just turned down the very place God wanted me. The voices reminding me that God's best doesn't always come first. I just wish it was obvious. I just wish. I am ready for a little peace. So ready.

[Dora]

I still believe that because He didn't make the direction strongly clear it was because either would be just fine.

I think you chose well. And everything will be okay.

[kimby]

Have I mentioned I like simple? And obvious...I am a huge fan of it too!
I was tentatively scheduled to meet the school board of the school I said yes to last night via Skype. Some things came up and that couldn't happen. Another teacher being offered a position was at the school board meeting and was hired. I was not. That cannot happen until the next school board meeting at the end of the month. Until then my position is not secure. The school board can turn me down.
This is the conversation I had with the superintendent today. He went on to say, knowing absolutely nothing of my turmoil, that if in the meantime something better came along to just let him know. Without having to ask, I have been released from my word. Is this a sign that I need to at least look into some other things? Or is it temptation that will lead me from where I am supposed to be?
My mother actually heard me out today. And genuinely apologised for not being able to tell me what to do. She did suggest one thing. But beyond that just couldn't say. I don't blame her. I am the one in the situation and can't say.
What I am sure of though, is that I need to be grateful for options. And I am...very glad. I just need a little direction to go with those options.

[dema]

I think it is a sign that if you have another option that appeals to your heart that you should pursue it. But, what does your heart say? Not your anxiety, your heart.

[kimby]

It is astounding just how much can change in a week! This time a week ago, I felt locked into a position I was grateful for but unexcited about. This time a week ago, I was stressed, unsettled, and anxious. So much has changed.

Last Thursday I endured a grueling hour-long interview with another school district. A school district that at one point I was very interested in, but had been told that the positions would all be filled internally. I was exhausted after the interview ended. The phone call that came less than ten minutes later offering me the position did a great deal to revive me though! I took the night to pray about it and seek the wisdom of people I trust. Someone pointed something out to me. I was excited about this opportunity. I was grateful for the other, but I was excited about this one. I woke up pretty sure of what I was to do. Confirmation came from three places that helped solidify that decision in my mind. I called the principal and accepted. I am still a little unsettled...but now it is because of excitement!

There is still a tumult of emotions surrounding leaving so much behind here. Now that the logistics are settled, I think I need to start dealing with them.

[Christianity Oasis]

When God moves things around in our life, it can be quite an emotional roller coaster.

Then, as we begin to adapt to said changes and evolve into it ...

A day comes when we are kicked back pondering on life and we remember ... We HOPED for the change at some point and may have even prayed for it and God's hand moved FOR us.

We are strange creatures, are we not?

We are oft times our own road block.

Praise God for all these times of being there for and with us, both past and future and His enduring LOVE and Grace for our strange ways.

Luv ya

[kimby]

My move became common knowledge today. This morning I announced in church that in seven weeks I would be leaving. I cannot describe what it felt like to look into the faces of the people I have come to love and consider family and say what I had to say. There were tears. At some point I have to run out, right?

[Livin4Christ]

Kimby, I was in your shoes! I didn't want to post on here either and having others read my "dirty laundry", but it has helped me soooooo much! I'm glad you decided to take that step too! Hang in there and we're all here going through it with you!

[Dora]

I love you Kimby.

Everything WILL be ok.

[Sandyg09]

Hi Kimby,

I read your post and looked at your profile picture. That's where you are right now. In the arms of your heavenly father, holding you close. His loving arms are around you comforting, healing and giving you peace in the midst of the storm.

[kimby]

When it rains, it pours. And when it pours, it floods. The last month or so it has felt like I have been drowning.
The upcoming move is still overwhelming. I am trying to not be sad, upset, or angry, but I am failing miserably which then adds guilt into the already thick emotional stew.
Old monsters have raised their heads again. I wonder when the day will come that they will no longer have the strength to do that.
So many things are out of my control right now, and that is an awful feeling.
God flat out told me this morning that I have a problem with trust and control. Just not sure how to fix that.

[xxJILLxx]

so sorry kimby,

I am praying that He will give you the strength to get through this overwhelming period in your life

I know how stressful making a move is being just gotten through it. It seems like it will never end, so many tasks to do, so many phone calls, so many plans... just so so so much. Try, and i say this cause i know it is almost impossible to do.. but when we try to do sooo much, it is so important to stay close to your personal time with Him. Several times a day I had to pour it all out to Him, then trust Him with what i gave Him... even in the midst of not seeing His plan for us. In my case the move was so quick, i dint have time to think too much on anything, just act... which was a good thing for me, cause Lord knows how my brain starts turning and second guessing everything.. ugggh.

Hang in there sis, im sure many here are praying for you as well. Easy does it sis. One day at a time, one list at time and one task at a time.

God bless you n keep u
♥Jill