Christianity Oasis Forum

[Guest]

OUCHY

I have to pray on this today, there is a battle going on right now. all those thoughts (excuses) I have to claim.

the walls are coming down, I am hurting so bad. but I need to keep going so that it can heal.

Its hard cause I know we dont "get away" with things with God, but I feel like the things done, there are no consequences to. I mean he asked God to forgive him, He did. now I am to forgive, forget what happened and happens, and trust. yikes. Is it wrong to want the person to hurt you to hurt as bad if not worse? and with all this forgiveness going on, and God allowing things to happen, what about my hurt, my feelings. And I see where in my mine its all about me me me. And I cant see past all that.

I dont want to hurt myself or Aaron anymore. though I may struggle, and fight this war waging in my mind. God will be the victor

[mlg]

uh huh sis...got a selfish bug....I think we all have that...and we don't want it to be about anyone but us...we want revenge....instead of letting it go...but vengence is mine says the Lord so who are we to want revenge? tsk tsk

Work really hard on this step sis...remember forgiving doesn't mean what happened to you was right nor does it mean that they are allowed to do it again...forgiveness means you are freeing yourself from the hurt and pain...you are breaking away the chains that are fettered around your feet...you are stepping up and stepping out...you are gonna grow closer to God one way or the other...if you want to then you will succeed.

Keep working sis.

luv ya

[momof3]

yep....and forgiveness means you are letting God be God..and recognizing that the noose you hold around other's necks..and your own...is not yours to hold. Let God be God and you be who He created you to be. God sees the whole picture..and knows each heart intimately. He knows how to deal and reach each one..and He sees the deepest darkest corners and secrets of those hearts...and knows why each one does the things we do....He is our healer....He is also the healer of those who hurt us...and their teacher, as well. Letting go, sis...frees you..and gives control back to the One who truly IS in control. Easy? No...but, doable, yes. Lay "me and my rights" aside. You will find its much easier to forgive you and others when you surrender your "rights" to His will.

God bless you, sis. You are doing an awesome job!

in Jesus,
love momo

[huelsingbroad]

forgiveness is living out the promise that you will;
1) not bring the issue up to the other party
2) not bring the issue up to yourself
3) not bring the issue up to other people
God made it clear that our sins were as far removed from him as the east is from the west.
the way to keep those thoughts out of your mind is to have it renewed.
the way to change an old habit is to not only stop the sinful behavior, but to create a righteous habit in it's place.
i know right now you don't "feel" like being intimate with your husband, but if there is something that will empower you( such as buying a new lingerie item) do it. initiate spontaneous intimacy with him, take time to make yourself up before hand, and pray, from start to finish that God will be pleased with the marriage bed.
i had shameful fantasies during sex with my husband, desires that ought to be, and the only way i could put them out of my mind was to pray. whether i was satisfied or not became less of an issue with me, but that sex pleasing him and pleasing to God. a long way from the hedonistic lifestyle we had enjoyed for so long.
most of all, don't worry about what you need to change, God will change you if you are willing to allow Him to do just that.
He will open your eyes to areas and things that grieve the Holy Spirit. H wants all of you, and you have to be willing to deny yourself, take up your cross and follow Him.
i am praying not only for your marriage, but for you

[deetu]

Oh yes, unforgiveness is a burden that you carry. The person you are holding a grudge against doesn't care or sometimes doesn't even know so it ends up being a burden you are carrying around... like a heavy sack of rocks!
Forgiving doesn't make you forget what happened but helps you to not view it with pain any more.

Glad those walls are coming down