How to Be a Supportive Wife

How to Be a Better Wife

Christianity Oasis has provided you with this intriguing, How to be a supportive wife workshop sharing various secrets regarding how to be a better wife. We'll look into that and how to become and remain a virtuous woman.



The Virtuous Woman
Step 15

Welcome to our Virtuous Woman Christian Walk adventure where we share an abundance of insightful and quite deLIGHTful Christian Walk Studies created to bring forth the virtuous woman within as well as bringing a smile to the lips and heart.

This specific virtuous voyage is our extremely exciting and personally provocative ... How to be a supportive wife Spiritual expedition taking an in depth look into effective and righteous steps concerning how to be a better wife for the good of all those you encounter, including yourself.

The absolutely awe inspiring message within reveals the secret recipe for how to be a supportive wife. We share the ingredients needed to know how to be a better wife in today's CON-fusing and oft times chaotic culture. This is going to be quite a ride and will touch every emotion that you possess. Buckle up !!!


Welcome back!



How to Be a Supportive Wife

How to Be a Better Wife

You're doing a great job! You're already halfway through with the 28 Steps of this program, and there's still plenty of great Truth ahead!

You know, I can't help but think about king Lemuel again, and his concerned mother when I read this verse. The gates, may be referring to one of two things ... In Biblical times, many cities had walls built around them, and the gates of course would be the place where people would enter and exit the city, but the palaces, where kings lived, also had a wall around them with a gate for entry and exit, and it was called the king's gate.

You will find many references to the "king's gate" in the Book of Esther. The "elders" of the land, would of course be the older men who were wise through experience obtained with long life and many were leaders of the people of that community.

Now imagine, a man, who has a good reputation, is respected, and holds a place of authority ... What kind of woman would he want to be known as his wife? Does this make you think back to the story of Sir Gawain and the Witch again?

Having a noble character is very important to a man, and being his "other half" it's important that a woman be noble as well. Now, let's talk about your "king" and your castle for a while. It's a rough world out there, and every ounce of support that you offer to your soul-mate is so very important.

Here is one example of how to be a supportive wife. Behind every good man, should stand a good woman. There I go with the old sayings again! She does not desire his administration though. She is content to be a woman, as God made her, and to fulfill the moral obligations of a virtuous woman. She doesn't lie in wait for him to return home from a day of earning a living for the family, to dump the children on him and take a Calgon bath because her life as a homemaker is so rough either.

No, she eagerly awaits his return to their home because she loves him, cannot wait to see his smiling eyes and takes every opportunity she can to make him as happy as she can. She knows how fortunate she is that she is protected from the world that he deals with, day in and day out, and always shows her appreciation of that fact.

Sure, everyone has a bad day from time to time, as we know, but if you truly seek how to be a supportive wife, with the right attitude, you will find those days to be very rare. Compare your day with his. Most of the events of his day are beyond his control. Rush hour traffic, nagging boss, deadlines, competitors, co-workers ... Not to mention all the games that Satan and his cohorts throw in to try and lure him to be anything but a virtuous man.

Your day, on the other hand, is very much in your own control. Screaming children can be turned into the chortling of little angel voices with a few jars of finger paint and a poster board. You get to see the awe and wonder of innocent faces as you tell them the story of Jesus' life, or read them a Little Golden Book. Even though you've told them the same stories a million times, they still hang on to your every syllable.

You can choose when to do laundry, cook, clean, sew ... Anything you wish. Best of all, you can spend time with God, whenever you want to, and nobody can say a word about it ... Ever! Knowing that he is returning to a happy home at the end of the day, your husband's day in the "gates," will be much easier to cope with.

You're not only showing your husband how much you cherish him by making his home his castle, but you are showing God as well. If Jesus was watching, would you miss a chance to get your husband something cool to drink or have dinner ready when he gets there? Would you complain about getting him his slippers or making sure his favorite chair didn't have matchbox cars and Playdoh all over it?

Would you be embarrassed if there were dishes piled in the sink and trash billowing out of the can? With the right attitude, and love in your heart, you'll find that you feel like you can't do enough for him. With your betrothed taking care of his work outside the home, and you, taking care of your work inside the home, that will leave you both with more time to spend together, and what better recipe could there be?


How to Be a Supportive Wife in Love
How to Be a Better Wife Instructions

Oh, and one more thing ... Don't make it a requirement for the love of your life to say thank you for every little thing you do. Chances are you don't thank him for going to work every day, or for paying the mortgage, or for providing groceries, or for mowing the lawn.

There are things that are just expected from both sides of your unity, and sometimes, when one is feeling all mushy and romantic, then it's really cool to express your appreciation for a certain thing, but don't make it a job, or a contest, or an obligation. That's just not how love works.

Speaking of Recipes

There is another old saying that I'm sure you've heard before, and I've noticed a lot of women believe it's the right recipe for finding a man who truly loves them. It goes something like this: If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours ... If it doesn't, it never was yours to begin with. (That may not be word for word, but you get the idea.) Now, if you're a Truth seeker, you'll see that in essence what this is really saying is, if you love a man, kick him to the curb and if he comes crawling back, then you've got it made sister.

Blechhhhh!

That's Love???

First off, if you truly love someone, you couldn't bear the idea of being without them so badly that this thought would never be a consideration, ever, ever, Ever! Secondly, what are you trying to prove? That you're tough as nails or that nothing sways you? (So what?) Maybe you're one who will never be controlled by a man like the first woman created from a rib. Remember, "and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." (Genesis 3:16)

Do you suppose everyday life doesn't test love enough, that you have to place the added burden on your soul-mate that you may, at will, "set him free" to test his love? That's preposterous! But very today's woman-ish. If you practice this "recipe" you're setting up a foundation for failure, in two ways:

  1. You're forcing, in the name of love, your soul-mate to cower to you, which makes him lose self respect and lose trust in you, and ...
  2. This subconsciously and simultaneously makes you lose respect for him too.


How to Be a Supportive Wife Woe
How to Be a Better Wife Pitfall

This game only diminishes the manliness of the man that you're so desperately seeking, and diminishes your womanhood as well. You will be single handedly creating your own demise by doing this. A woman needs a man to be the man. She wants to be what she was intended by God to be ... If she's virtuous. Don't shoot yourself in the foot by cooking up this kind of recipe.

A similar antic which women actually think is clever and frequently use to try and "catch" a man, is to play hard to get. Again, if you're a Truth seeker, and you truly love someone, wild horses couldn't keep you away from them. Don't play games with love. You could lose. Learn how to be a supportive wife.

Need A Band Aid?

Let's have a little refresher on how to be a supportive wife in case you forgot the message back in Step 4. Okay, so what do you do now if ... Perhaps you've been a very dominating woman. Your mate, loves you so much he would rather allow your persistence to wield authority that God never gave woman, than to lose you.

Well, your respect for each other, as I mentioned earlier, needs fixing and you may need to initiate it. (Because maybe you had something to do with creating the problem?) Your domineering causes his weakness. It's a cycle that must be broken. You must surrender your insistence to be the "almighty woman" before he will ever even be interested in being the man that you really want and need.

Communicate. Surrender. Apologize. Repent. Start fresh. Give the king his crown back ... Yes, that one that you snatched off of his head and put on your own.

Jealous?

How to Be a Better Wife Warning ... For some women, instead of the dominant/submissive problem, jealousy of their mate's job, reputation, influence, power, etc., is the issue. It's a dog-gone shame, because if the spirit of jealousy was instead a spirit of understanding, so much more could be accomplished for God. We're all unique.

We all have a calling. God has a plan for each of us. But as you know, when you espouse someone else, you two become one, and if you are truly one with your husband, you both will compliment each other's qualities and work together to serve the Lord in unity. There's no time for jealousy ... God has business for you to do!


How to Be a Supportive Wife for the Family
How to Be a Better Wife for Your Husband

Now, here you are, halfway through with this Virtuous Woman program and there are probably some things that have become clear that you really hadn't contemplated about before. I'm sure there have also been some things that you have disagreed with, but because you love God, you're trying to work through them, but even with all this effort, all this fuss about being virtuous, deep inside you may be wondering ... What's in it for Me? Well, beside looking into the mirror of your soul and not feeling disgusted, let me mention a few of the benefits of being virtuous.

Earthly Things
  • a husband that absolutely adores you (Verse 28)
  • the obvious respect of other virtuous women and the secret respect of worldly women - trendsetter
  • strength and honor (Verse 25)
  • admiration of your children (Verse 28)
  • praise (Verse 30)
  • peace of mind
  • self respect
  • purpose
Eternal Things
  • eternal life
  • invitation to the Marriage Supper of the Lamb
  • become an Angel
  • many mansions (John 14:2)
  • no death, sorrow, crying, pain or tears (Revelation 21:4)
  • was there anything else you needed?

Sounds like a good deal to me ... In fact, a bargain!


How to Be a Supportive Wife Truth
How to Be a Better Wife Silently

A virtuous woman learns all she can from her husband, but applies it to her own ministry within the home. If it seems like a tough challenge. That's only because the world has taught you otherwise. The environment outside of her home is not part of a virtuous woman's identity.

1 Corinthians 14:34-35

34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law.
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.


1 Timothy 2:11-15

11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.
12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.
15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.


Philippians 4:11

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.

Did I make those things up? No way. They're from the Bible girls. So if you're in contention, who are you really in contention with?

Procrastination ... Ugh!


How to Be a Supportive Wife Summary
How to Be a Better Wife in Peace

A lot of times, we don't face things head on because we're afraid of the Truth. A big part of the reason why women don't adopt virtue as their default method of living is because of selfish reasons. The Truth is, they like the lifestyle that they lead, free of the responsibility of being righteous. Yes, being virtuous does take a lot of responsibility.

They also don't want to miss out on the "fun" that they've become accustomed to. My friend, I tell you this with all sincerity; what the world offers may look exciting, fun, pleasing, captivating ... But we don't see what lies behind it's deceptive promises.

The promises of the world are temporary. What may seem fun, exciting, or feel good for a moment will all soon turn to dust, but the soul lives on forever. They should choose to seek ways on how to be a better wife.

You were led here by the Holy Spirit because in one way or another, even though you may be hiding the Truth from yourself and procrastinating, He heard your soul groaning for change. You may not want to admit it to yourself, because it means you will have to give up some things, some actions, some habits, some mannerisms, but He heard.

He is hoping that you will choose to lean on Him for help in this very fulfilling quest that you have undertaken. I also urge you to press on, because there are a lot of great things ahead to learn about and ponder upon. The rewards are Eternal!

And as always, reflect on God's Grace, every day of your life. Thank Him and praise Him for it, because it's the best thing we could ever hope for!

God is proud of you!


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The Virtuous Woman Steps

15

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