Christianity Oasis Forum

[Mrsabrown79]

Yesterday started off good, my husband and I along with our boys went to church and it was really joyful! However as always the enemy is busy. My night didn't end the way it should have. My husband and I had a huge disagreement. We are not on the same page as far as our marriage and how we should be towards one another. All I can do is pray that God comes into both of our hearts and the Holy Spirit speaks to us to show us what and how to become spiritually connected. I believe if we can get on the same page spiritually, all the other petty stuff will soon disappear, or at least that's what I hope for. After venting, I do feel a little better today, but the tension between us is still there. I printed out my miracle grow chart and listed my activities I want to do everyday. So hopefully as I keep my focus on growing spiritually my husband will do the same and then maybe we end up on the same page. Until then, I can only take one day at a time, try to forget the past and move forward, and most importantly keep my focus on God and my relationship with him. I am praying for you all as well and hope your doing the same, good day!

God Bless

[grandma dolittle]

keep praying and loving him.

[Dora]

My heart is heavy for you today. It's so difficult when the one you are to be one with isn't in agreement.

I find it helpful to accept that we didn't agree about something now, but perhaps one day we will. Perhaps one day I'll change my mind. Perhaps the reason you're not able to agree is because your gifts Gods placed with in each of you is clashing. He brings opposites together so we can complete each other. I have found MOST of my arguments with my spouse is because one or both of us just didn't understand the other at the time. Seek to understand where he's coming from. You may find peace when you find understanding.

God bless and keep you!

[Mrsabrown79]

Thank you Pine, I do believe we both need to seek to understand each others love language. I will continue to pray for understanding so we can find that peace! God Bless

[Dora]

I've been trying to understand my spouses love language for years. Not sure I have it pinned down yet.

BUT once we really began to share and talk I began to realize why he does certain things and why he asks certain things of me.

Like he would get so frustrated every time I'd leave ANYTHING at the top of the stairs. I'm busy! I stack things there till I have a few items and make one trip. Makes since to me. Years and years he'd get frustrated with me and remind me he asked me not to do that! Usually in a hasty voice. I'd try to not put things there but eventually I would get busy and start stacking things at the top of the steps so I could make one trip instead of two or three or four.

Then when sharing deeply about our struggles we had growing up and in our young adult life, I realized when he was a young adult he was an EMT, he drove the ambulance. A man had fallen down the stairs and because there was so much stuff in the way they couldn't get to him and he died. My husband has carried that with him for 25 years. Every time he sees something at the top of the stairs he is reminded of that horrible event. After I realized this, out of love and respect, I stopped putting anything at the top of the stairs. The point is, sometimes there are deeper reasons people do things and we just don't understand it. Sometimes they aren't ready to even admit to themselves why they do certain things as it hurts to much to think about it and talk about it. Maybe your issues between you and your spouse is nothing like this. Then again maybe it is just a matter of not understanding each other.

I pray God gives you both time to work these things out. Never forget when you fell in love and why you fell in love with him.

God bless and keep you. Hope this helps.