Springs, streams, and rushing rivers: whisp blog

[Whisperingsprings]

Streams and Rivers:

As of late it's been more of the streams. Kinda like streams in the desert. The time when I needed refreshment to clear my thoughts, the stream of water came and washed the fuzziness of my mind. I realized that I needed to join alanon or something similar. Picking up the phone, I dialed the number, spoke with the receptionist, and she confirmed that my church did in fact have an alanon group.

I went last night. My first meeting. The tears came on and off, but, I stuffed them back down and was good to go for a while. Considering it was my first meeting, I learned alot: rushing rivers.

Rushing rivers:
The realizations came quickly though not harshly. I like so many other people don't want the sin as much as I want the pain to abate or leave permanently. Hmmm, the lonliness-when people reject all you have to offer which is your true self, then yes: the pain rushes in catching the breath, stealing the peacefulness. I suppose that really is the issue for me-traveling through this intensity of pain again--only this time with children. Thank goodness, my husband is alive for now to help the children make the journey. It isn't their fault if I fall apart. They are babies. I love them.

Springs:
As always, God gives reprieve. I came home after the meeting and the only one to greet me at the door was the dog . I needed that to be the case. I couldn't have handled everyone else. Our dog escorted me upstairs and to bed. I slept well.

Rivers again:
:D Today, will be rushing rivers yet again. Baseball . . . . baseball :D

[mlg]

Hi Whispering I'm glad you are beginning to blog. Your first al-anon meeting and seems like it was a good experience for you...a step on the road for true healing...

God is proud of you sis.

luv ya

[Dora]

I know that sting of rejection. When the world rejects us we can lean completely on Christ and that is where our relationship with him is built. In the end that's the one relationship that matters the most.

Glad to hear you caught a meeting. I'm sure everyone there has shed their share of tears as well.

[Mercy7]

Whispering, its ok, you know what? Jesus was rejected by this world and the world didn;t recognize Him, We are not of this world, we are in this world just passing through, We belong to God. Just make sure that you are accepted in Jesus He will not reject you, He will never leave nor forsake you. How awesome it that!! So sometimes we need to not worry about what people say about us but listen to what the Lord says to us, and follow HIM.
Keep on keeping on and your journaling or bloging looks good, keep it up

[Whisperingsprings]

thanks for your support ladies.

[Whisperingsprings]

Streams:

Today was good. I'm trying to ignore some of the food issues as those are very very frustrating.

Meanwhile, church was great, I don't remember everything the pastor said, but I picked up the don't do too much so that you FEEL important. Just do what you are assigned by God. When I want to FEEL important or pitied for that matter, it's my pride and ego that I want stroked. Interesting . . . .

Pancakes for lunch, and now it's dinner time. I was able to plant pansies in the front yard (purple pansies with the yellow dot in the center.) I need 1 more geranium though and LOTS of snail killer .

Tomorrow I need to plant the asian peas under one of the trees and some carrots somewhere else - hmmm, haven't figured that one out yet.

Anywhoosie, we're doing fine. The dog ran all over while I planted in the front yard. Soooo, I guess that accounts for all of us.

Have a good evening everyone.

[mlg]

Wonderful sis...just what you deserved...a day like today...and the gardening...sounds like fun...bet it will be pretty when everything begins to grow

luv ya

[Dora]

That sounds so nice.
Got me thinking of what I'm going to plant and where.
Spring is in the air! Isn't it great.

[Whisperingsprings]

thanks smiley.

And yes, my plants very much remind me of my relationship with God. That's part of the reason, I'm out there. I watch my yard every year. I've tried to work hard with it and I've let it be terribly neglected. Other times, I just haven't known what to do. It's nice to see God's hand at work in my yard, because often times I can't see it in my life as easily. It also gives me time to pray, think, and ponder. I have had expensive failures with some of my plants - actually alot of my plants. Meanwhile, I have also had ard work pay off and finally get a tree to bear fruit after a few years of trying to save the dang thing.

My yard is good for me.

[mlg]

Wow do I know that feeling sis...I've planted many things over the years to watch them die for one reason or the other...so when something does begin to show fruit...wow it's like a pleasant relief to see how our hardwork pays off...sort of like when we are able to fight off temptations and attacks by the enemy...the reward that awaits us in Heaven...is oh so worth it

luv ya

[Whisperingsprings]

Honest, but very difficult evening. Points made but where from now, I don't know. Yes, I can and will pray, this is always a given. But, I have learned that God doesn't impose on anyone elses will. They have choices to make just like I or anyone else. And, God will honor those choices inspite of whether He agrees or not.

I need to learn how to do that much better. I have a few ideas but, not sure if my ideas are good ones or not. I do know that the ideas are safe for all concerned-including the dog for that matter. It's just the emotional navigation of any situation which involves another person that becomes difficult.

Will be going back to bed soon. I'm exhausted.

[mlg]

Whispering I hear the struggle in your words sis. My prayers are with you. May God's light bring understanding to the path...and peace in knowing that His will is what you have found.

Rest well my sister.

luv ya