Hello, Day 1

[driverl86]

Hello everyone, This is my first day on here. I saw the 14 day process and am giving it a try. I dont usually reach out for help anymore but I can tell that it is effecting not just me but everyone around me. I feel so alone and I dont have anyone to talk to who wont judge me. To make this quick, Im am suffering from a lifetime of neglect, bullying, sadness and anger. I have never been close to anyone....ever. I feel like a balloon that someone let go and I just drift farther and farther away. I go for long periods of time without talking to family and friends. They all judge that's why I dont talk to them. I dont want to write a book on my troubled past but just to give you an idea, neglectful mother who left at a young age, father was a drinker and a bully, bullied at school b/c we were poor, got married&pregnant at 16. Im not a pitiful victim. Im not asking anyone to feel sorry for me. It's just that I have felt so alone for so long and I cant shake that feeling. I wish I had someone to talk to who could help me. All I ever hear is, get over it and move on and I have but it dosnt change the fact that Im hurting. I was never able to truly grieve the loss of my mother (still living but not around). I was never able to talk to anyone about how I feel. I was always told growing up that crying dosnt solve anything. To this day I cannot cry in front of people or when Im alone. I feel so lost. My life is not all bad though. I've been married for 9 years and I have a beautiful 8 yo daughter. I can look around me right now and I cant tell you one thing that I need that I dont already have. I am very blessed. I have come a very long way in my. God bless my husband for sticking with me all these years . I really need to break down these walls before it starts effecting my releationship with my husband and daughter.

[calebsmom77]

So glad that you found your way here! A lot of us here can definately say we understand what it feels like to feel alone. You have come to a good place because there are lots of people who care, will pray with you and for you. I pray that you may find peace, healing and relationships here

[sbennett]

Yay I am really glad you are here!! I did the CCCC steps and they really helped me. I know you want to be strong and not pitiful... I get that. But this is a place where you can feel free to share and talk. Chat is fun... and there are other good studies. Im praying that you will find help and peace by doing the steps and God will bless you good.

[Dora]

You have everything yet feel so empty?

I can relate.

I pray through this process you can build a closer relationship with the one who can not only break down those walls but can give you joy and peace beyond your understanding.

He's really good like that.

[driverl86]

Thank you all so much. It's nice to know that there are caring people out there.