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day 3, God's Grace
God's Grace, oh how sweet the sound . The next thought thru my mind after reading that, was , " though I walk through the shadow .... " .
I used to sketch my "thoughts for the day" but for the past 2 or 3 days I find myself living them , (now that I dont even have my pad anymore) and waisting precious time with God with my whinings instead . For some strange reason I am finding it more and more comforting NOT to have all the "luxuries" that I did , 'cause I didn't realize how much they owned me,
and how consumed I was by them , and as a result , was taking God's Grace for granted.
Even though from time to time I get aggravated by reaching for something like a file or some notes I had jotted down - ie : my 1st journal - thinking I still have them and which takes me right back to reality , and I find myself going "umph ! I could just.... !!!" But , by God's Grace , and my friends' suggestions at OASIS that I go through the steps once over again , that today I find myself snapping right out of that frame of mind immediately, here's another Grace ! for without it , I would just continue on , build it up , till I get to the point of explosion , and not wanting to do so, I seclude myself from life , filled with fear , and a feeling of a failure ,and next thing you know I'm filled with Guilt that I am actually thinking those thoughts knowing that they are unpleasent in the eyes of God .
A viciuos cycle and it went on and on , to the point where I started sounding like one of the "Whining Prophets" saying things like, all is useless , everything is useless , why should I go on , it seems ,no matter how hard I try, I still have an evil mind , for a healthy mind doesn't think that way, I thought I was a friend of God , and here I am stabbing Him in the back with such thoughts , friends dont treat friends like that. Even though I know better , here I am doing it , may be I'm just not it !
Those were the feelings I was entertaining prior to opening up just a little bit to friends I trusted here , I mean Just a tiny little bit that that opened up , my friends just read me LOUD and CLEAR through and through and didnt mince their words either . Now I dont know about everyone else , if that is not a friendship built on and by the Grace of God , I simply dont know what is ! Talk about God Living inside EACH one of us huh ?
People I know here ask me how am I able to snap out of such situations so quickly , I tell I have no clue , all I know is that I pray and talk to God no matter what , yes even when I'm angry at Him , I tell Him, and tell Him I dont want to be angry no more , and the anger is gone , you dont believe me, try it , it might even work for you , I hate to be "special" for God is respecter of no person , you pray with your soul , He answers with His , and He doesnt hold grudges like we do , not only H forgives , He even goes a steps further and never remembers it again , but here's the catch , you still are responsible for your actions , and it is you that has to live by the memory of the consequence , but you dont do it again, you dont have to go through it again , as simple as that.
And as for me , as long as I keep those fingers get cramps from typing to you guys , I dont have to worry of veering that far off course , so please in Jesus' name I pray that you keep on recieving God's Grace to be able to pass it on to me and other souls that stumble along the way and never hit the ground because of GRACE .
May God bless you and keep you (HERE !)
I used to sketch my "thoughts for the day" but for the past 2 or 3 days I find myself living them , (now that I dont even have my pad anymore) and waisting precious time with God with my whinings instead . For some strange reason I am finding it more and more comforting NOT to have all the "luxuries" that I did , 'cause I didn't realize how much they owned me,
and how consumed I was by them , and as a result , was taking God's Grace for granted.
Even though from time to time I get aggravated by reaching for something like a file or some notes I had jotted down - ie : my 1st journal - thinking I still have them and which takes me right back to reality , and I find myself going "umph ! I could just.... !!!" But , by God's Grace , and my friends' suggestions at OASIS that I go through the steps once over again , that today I find myself snapping right out of that frame of mind immediately, here's another Grace ! for without it , I would just continue on , build it up , till I get to the point of explosion , and not wanting to do so, I seclude myself from life , filled with fear , and a feeling of a failure ,and next thing you know I'm filled with Guilt that I am actually thinking those thoughts knowing that they are unpleasent in the eyes of God .
A viciuos cycle and it went on and on , to the point where I started sounding like one of the "Whining Prophets" saying things like, all is useless , everything is useless , why should I go on , it seems ,no matter how hard I try, I still have an evil mind , for a healthy mind doesn't think that way, I thought I was a friend of God , and here I am stabbing Him in the back with such thoughts , friends dont treat friends like that. Even though I know better , here I am doing it , may be I'm just not it !
Those were the feelings I was entertaining prior to opening up just a little bit to friends I trusted here , I mean Just a tiny little bit that that opened up , my friends just read me LOUD and CLEAR through and through and didnt mince their words either . Now I dont know about everyone else , if that is not a friendship built on and by the Grace of God , I simply dont know what is ! Talk about God Living inside EACH one of us huh ?
People I know here ask me how am I able to snap out of such situations so quickly , I tell I have no clue , all I know is that I pray and talk to God no matter what , yes even when I'm angry at Him , I tell Him, and tell Him I dont want to be angry no more , and the anger is gone , you dont believe me, try it , it might even work for you , I hate to be "special" for God is respecter of no person , you pray with your soul , He answers with His , and He doesnt hold grudges like we do , not only H forgives , He even goes a steps further and never remembers it again , but here's the catch , you still are responsible for your actions , and it is you that has to live by the memory of the consequence , but you dont do it again, you dont have to go through it again , as simple as that.
And as for me , as long as I keep those fingers get cramps from typing to you guys , I dont have to worry of veering that far off course , so please in Jesus' name I pray that you keep on recieving God's Grace to be able to pass it on to me and other souls that stumble along the way and never hit the ground because of GRACE .
May God bless you and keep you (HERE !)
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vahn - Posts: 809
- Location: Earth (STILL !!)
You know what I see most vahn, is the struggle between the good and the bad that is taking place inside you right now. The fact that you know that you need to be spending as much time as possible, but the pity party of the flesh wants to take over and keep you from doing so. This is why you need to keep refreshing yourself in the Lord and pulling the weeds from your mind each time the thoughts that would hold you back come up.
I know you say you have lost everything...but think about this...remember when Jesus sent the apostles out...they couldn't take anything with them, not even a change of clothes...cuz God wanted them to trust Him to provide....well now is the time that God is asking you to trust Him vahn. I know you are suffering and struggling, but I also know that God hasn't given up on you...so don't give up on Him. He will receive the glory from this...if you will just keep on pushing through. He will bless you in return.
luv ya
I know you say you have lost everything...but think about this...remember when Jesus sent the apostles out...they couldn't take anything with them, not even a change of clothes...cuz God wanted them to trust Him to provide....well now is the time that God is asking you to trust Him vahn. I know you are suffering and struggling, but I also know that God hasn't given up on you...so don't give up on Him. He will receive the glory from this...if you will just keep on pushing through. He will bless you in return.
luv ya
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mlg - Posts: 4428
- Marital Status: Not Interested
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