Worry
Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 4:33 am
Worry is something that I know everyone has trouble with, it is a vicious emotion. I certainly struggle with it!
Right now my particular worry is about how unwell I am. I have had a sore throat for 24 weeks, nearly 25 (As my fiancé pointed out that is nearly 6 months!). I have been to the doctors 3 different times. I saw a doctor when I had the sore throat for 8 weeks; he prescribed me some antibiotics and also gave me a very expensive nasal spray. He is convinced that I have a post nasal drip, considering that I also get sinus infections. The Antibiotics didn't work, and the nasal spray only worked for my sinus infections. I had no improvement in my sore throat at all. I decided to try some natural remedies... swallowing spoonfuls of honey, honey and lemon drink, gargling salt water, gargling baking soda, and drinking a tea spoon of Olive Leaf Extract daily. Nothing worked. So I went back to the doctor at 11 weeks with my sore throat, and he decided to do a throat swab test and a blood test. He also prescribed me some stronger antibiotics. A week later I found out that the results for the tests came back clear. The tests ruled out Glandular Fever, Tonsillitis, and pretty much every throat problem he could think of. The Antibiotics also had done nothing at all. By this time I was pretty fed up, however I waited another week or two before I went back to the doctors; although this time I decided to try a different doctor. This doctor was useless... he gave me mouth drops for Oral thrush.... and although it was surprisingly tasty, it didn't do anything! I also asked him to give me a referral to an Ear Nose and Throat specialist. He decided to give me 5 different numbers to ring up... once I find the right one, I was told to ring my doctor back, and he will then refer me to them. I never really got around to ringing anyone up. I don't particularly enjoy talking to people on the phone, and I also know that the first visit to any ENT is going to be around $150 AUD. I am a bit hesitant on spending my money on what could be a waste of time!
So here I am sick. My throat doesn't always hurt the same, but it always hurts. I also have a cold that pretty much never goes. My sinus infections are terrible! Something that is really frustrating me, is that I keep getting sick in the stomach. I'm not usually one to get a sick stomach, but it has gotten to the point where I am scared of going out because I don't want to be sick. Part of my sinus infection is to do with dairy consumption, and I'm wondering if I have become allergic to something that is making my stomach sick. People have even suggested that it could be an allergy that is causing my sore throat. I have noticed my increase in allergies lately, so these theories are possible. My immune system is the lowest it has ever been, and it is frightening!
I have prayed all the way through this, and my church family has prayed… I get the feeling that God either doesn’t want my throat healed, or he wants me to do something more about it. I REALLY want to get better, and I am worried, but on the other hand… my sickness has been masking emotional troubles. Recently I have been really scared to go to work. I am only a Casual Childcare Group Leader, so it means that I don’t actually have to accept work if a childcare centre rings me up. For some reason I just can’t bring myself to be motivated to work… I’m scared of work, and I am scared of not being accepted by the staff. It helps to be sick, because it is an excuse not to work. I know it means that I don’t get money, but it stops my Dad from forcing me into it!
As you can see, I’m in a bit of a mess.. . I don’t know what’s worse… my sickness, or my not being motivated to work?
Got any ideas! Lol... sorry for the SA!
Right now my particular worry is about how unwell I am. I have had a sore throat for 24 weeks, nearly 25 (As my fiancé pointed out that is nearly 6 months!). I have been to the doctors 3 different times. I saw a doctor when I had the sore throat for 8 weeks; he prescribed me some antibiotics and also gave me a very expensive nasal spray. He is convinced that I have a post nasal drip, considering that I also get sinus infections. The Antibiotics didn't work, and the nasal spray only worked for my sinus infections. I had no improvement in my sore throat at all. I decided to try some natural remedies... swallowing spoonfuls of honey, honey and lemon drink, gargling salt water, gargling baking soda, and drinking a tea spoon of Olive Leaf Extract daily. Nothing worked. So I went back to the doctor at 11 weeks with my sore throat, and he decided to do a throat swab test and a blood test. He also prescribed me some stronger antibiotics. A week later I found out that the results for the tests came back clear. The tests ruled out Glandular Fever, Tonsillitis, and pretty much every throat problem he could think of. The Antibiotics also had done nothing at all. By this time I was pretty fed up, however I waited another week or two before I went back to the doctors; although this time I decided to try a different doctor. This doctor was useless... he gave me mouth drops for Oral thrush.... and although it was surprisingly tasty, it didn't do anything! I also asked him to give me a referral to an Ear Nose and Throat specialist. He decided to give me 5 different numbers to ring up... once I find the right one, I was told to ring my doctor back, and he will then refer me to them. I never really got around to ringing anyone up. I don't particularly enjoy talking to people on the phone, and I also know that the first visit to any ENT is going to be around $150 AUD. I am a bit hesitant on spending my money on what could be a waste of time!
So here I am sick. My throat doesn't always hurt the same, but it always hurts. I also have a cold that pretty much never goes. My sinus infections are terrible! Something that is really frustrating me, is that I keep getting sick in the stomach. I'm not usually one to get a sick stomach, but it has gotten to the point where I am scared of going out because I don't want to be sick. Part of my sinus infection is to do with dairy consumption, and I'm wondering if I have become allergic to something that is making my stomach sick. People have even suggested that it could be an allergy that is causing my sore throat. I have noticed my increase in allergies lately, so these theories are possible. My immune system is the lowest it has ever been, and it is frightening!
I have prayed all the way through this, and my church family has prayed… I get the feeling that God either doesn’t want my throat healed, or he wants me to do something more about it. I REALLY want to get better, and I am worried, but on the other hand… my sickness has been masking emotional troubles. Recently I have been really scared to go to work. I am only a Casual Childcare Group Leader, so it means that I don’t actually have to accept work if a childcare centre rings me up. For some reason I just can’t bring myself to be motivated to work… I’m scared of work, and I am scared of not being accepted by the staff. It helps to be sick, because it is an excuse not to work. I know it means that I don’t get money, but it stops my Dad from forcing me into it!
As you can see, I’m in a bit of a mess.. . I don’t know what’s worse… my sickness, or my not being motivated to work?
Got any ideas! Lol... sorry for the SA!