An intense day (testimony)
Posted: Sun Nov 13, 2016 7:15 pm
Yesterday I decided it was time for a fast, I drank water read passages in the bible and other information on people who fasted then meditated and began visualizing restorations and purifications. I saw an angel fly out of me during one meditation and a giant serpent leaving me another. These subtle visions I calmly let happen with confidence in the process then around 1 after talking to my brother about k2 in grass fed meats I had a thought "don't fast eat a grass fed steak, kill Jackie" (Jackie is a young woman who worked with my brother and commited fornication with him and had a baby, she now lives with my mom while my brother and I live in separate locations.) this is the second time I prayed to God and got the reply to "kill Jackie". So I decided to pray to Shiva to which I got the reply "continue the fast, don't kill Jackie. I decided to tell my mom and of course she was disturbed, I reasoned with her saying God is a murderer. I then saw an subtle angel appear and go towards my mom and pick out a grey fat monster from my body. She responded saying haven't you ever heard of the 10 commandments? Then she said that she loved Jackie and that if I feel that way maybe I should spend more time away from her and the house where she's at. I told her I love Jackie too and explained the vision that just occurred. We then decided to go to the beach. At the beach people were talking about partying and then I got the thought "I'm hungry" I then reasoned that maybe my brain wants nourishment oppose to my previous method of praying to God to keep me on the fast and strengthen my connection with him. We went to Von's and bought some bread while the doors were playing on the store radio. I ate the bread and went to a Japanese resteraunt for vegan sushi and vegetable tempura. My mom said we probably shouldn't get meat for me because of the thought I had. It was around 5 when I decided to text my friend Joey to hang out because it felt to early to go home to bed. He said he's watching the UFC fight and to roll through. I said to Jackie who was with her son, I guess I'm going to joeys to watch the UFC fight and left. Walking towards his house I began to imagine myself drinking alcohol at his house. Upon arriving I noticed he had many friends there and was pouring shots of vodka. He offered me a shot and I accepted it and then started watching the fight. People began rolling marijuana blunts and a man named Otto offered me LSD. I said not tonight and I don't have any money. I grabbed another beer and started drinking. A couple of friends went out to smoke cigarettes and I followed them to talk. They started talking about how they want to go to a Kanye West show and I said worthless and my friend said "There's so many hot girls there" I left. I began contemplating how they were part of a common network of pop culture and beauty but superficialness. Then I began to think of the group of stoners in the back yard and how they were in an alternative network. My friend Moses (one of the guys who wanted to go to the concert) entered the house and said help me finish this whiskey. I grabbed a cup and he filled it half way, I drank two gulps while watching more of the fight then went out back to hang put with the stoners. They had already smoked and I don't know why but I began to think I love you gio to one of the guys I was standing near. I then began to peer into his soul and saw him as a green tentacled alien and a heart shape bulged out from his chest. I sat down by the other stoners in font of the back yard tv they had on the couch. They began discussing how they'd make a deal to try out the LSD for free. Gio suggested I take it since I've done it before. I agreed and me and a guy named Alec took one tab. One of the stoners named Steven asked what it does. Otto began saying it teaches you about yourself other people the world. Then I said yeah there exists a reality that connects you to all people and things and LSD can make you aware of that. He said he didn't want to here talk like that and layed back with a blanket and continued watching the fight. I went to one of the backyard reclining chairs and sat waiting for it to kick in as I watched his dogs play and gazed at the couple of stars that were visible. Then I got the idea to use some printer paper to draw something. Joey got me some and I went back into the house and drew while everyone got riled up about the fight. Otto asked if I felt it yet I told him no and that I wasn't hallucinating yet. I finished the two abstract and meditative drawings and went out to the front. Alec was there and said he didn't feel anything and that he bought another tab and took it. He began saying Otto doesn't have real acid and that he could get some that quickly makes your face melt. I remained silent. I then said it might kick in after an hour and a half. Then went in and said I was gonna go home, Joey said "at least stay for the main event!" I replied I guess I can have one more beer. Grabbed a Budweiser and went to the backyard tv drank a couple of gulps while mcgregor and Alvarez fought, mcgregor won by knockout and I got up and walked to the kitchen to pour the beer down the sink(I remembered Budweiser is just a malt extract with water and high fructose corn syrup plus it was disgusting). I said later to everyone and grabbed my drawings. Moses was in the front yard smoking a ciggarette and said "get home safe". I walked home brushed my teeth and got into bed. Once I layed down I began to have a horrible stream of dark visions that would not end, I felt a dark presence in the room that brought fright to my heart so I decided to put on some sleep music from YouTube on my phone. I chose a Tibetan singing bowl meditation and it was very pleasant to my ears but the visions were still bad. I prayed to Christ and saw a white light angel through a screen of webbed black goo. Demonic sights came and I stopped saying Christ help me. I prayed to Odin for strength and saw a large bearded man with a hammer sparking. I thought even thoracic hammer isn't working for me. I began to see a fairy and it stayed bold in my sight for a few seconds but then got muddled with the darkness. I thought I'll take a shower and checked the time and it was almost 2 am. I took a long shower and it was great because I have a nice shower filter. I went back to bed without the music and turned the light off but saw a giant red eyed shadow monster in my minds eye. So I turned on the light put my sleep mask on and went to sleep tossing and turning all night with nightmares. I woke up to then and got dressed and went to my moms house. She asked if I wanted to go to the unity church with her and that today is my deceased grandmas birthday. I ultimately decide to stay with my brother and his son and we go to the park after getting starbucks. He begins talking to me about the corruption of the Democratic Party and the media. I sit alone in the shade while they play on the children's equipment. I begin thinking I need to take responsibility to make America great again and I could start by reporting Otto and stopping him from selling LSD at raves. I'm determined and my brothers metal music and post punk playing with all it's negative lyrics wont denture me. I get home and make the report eat lunch and find I'm accepted to Christianity oasis.