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My weakness goes back to my childhood in which my mother. aunt and grandmother would take all their negative feelings about men on me. I cannot repeat some of the vile things they said about me when I was 7-8-9-10 years old. I can say that it convinced me that I was worthless and that no one could ever love the real me. That is why I was distant with my wife.

Now, I'm paying the price yet again. The weeds in my garden are many and they have grown deep in me because they were planted when I was so young. I pray that this path help me to heal. I want to be the man God intended me to be. I want the kind of marriage that I believe God wants us all to have.

My prayer that Judy would get a new job today was not answered by God. She and her crush had a fight and she walked out. But, the manager got on the phone along with her crush and convinced her to return to work.

I keep asking God to move my wife into a tech job here in the Northern VA area. She has training with Net+ and A+ certifications. She has Microsoft MCITP training. She has some Loadrunner and QTP training yet there is no place that we have found for her.

I just don't understand his delay or answer of no to moving Judy from contact with this guy she so badly wants to be "just friends" with.

She speaks of needing time to herself. She would like to go stay in a hotel for a few days. Should I encourage her to do that? I'm so afraid she won't return. She has told me that everything I do now irritates her. Any ideas what I can do?

Hi will, yep there's some weeds there, and it's time to begin pulling them one by one. Just know that you are wonderfully created by God and He sees you for who He knows you are and not who others say you are. What others say does not define who we are....only God within us defines the True You!

Will, I think sometimes God answers a prayer with not this one or not now because He is not finished with His plan. He knows just what your wife needs...so trust in Him and know that He isn't finished yet.

As for your wife needing some space, how about suggesting a Christian retreat for women. I think she'd really enjoy spending some time in the presence of the Lord with other Christian women. And what better hands to leave your wife in than His.

Sometimes a couple does need a little time here and there away...but if you tell her no...at this point she will only rebel and feel like you are suffocating her...which you can't do...so trust God with her. Pray without ceasing my friend...put your requests before God and let Him move...but first you have to get out of His way. A Christian woman's retreat might be just what thy Great Physician orders for her.

Praying for you.

Take care and God Bless

My wife doesn't want to go to a retreat. I think she is rebelling against what she knows is the right thing to do.......she is holding her crush in her heart and mind. She literally dreams about working together being "friends" again.

Do you think that the local hotel would be good.

Well Will, what's her plans if she goes to stay at a hotel? Does she insist on it being that particular one?

I'm not really sure what to think at the moment as I don't know the entire situation...I will say that you need to really pray about all of this with your wife and alone...but I think asking her to pray together would be a start.

Take care

Praying Gods will for you brother.

Consider seeking what God says about you. And replacing those nasty words and lies from your past with Gods words. The truth.

Consider reading Rom 8:14-17 and Ephesian 1:3-14

hello brother will :o)

hmm self worth?..i can relate to that..if it took long time to develop, surely it will take time to realize that it was already there for a long time..He recently showed it to me..indirectly thru people..and just like He said in Isaiah 46:4..

He c reated you..He made you..thats why u are precious to Him..your worth is in Him alone..you are very precious that make the enemy wanting you very badly and tried any possible way to redeem your soul as well..he will used that weaknesses not only once..but again and again until we get exhausted and wanting to give in..and He said..His strength is perfect in our weaknesses.. admitting it and give it all to Him..is a good start for Him to step in your life to turn the things around..in way that u ve never imagine before..for the time being..He is carrying you..and will deliver u..if u choose not to faint.. dun lose that hope..hang in there brother.