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Sunday School
LOT 'S WIFE:
The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife
looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little
Jason interrupted, My Mummy looked back once, while
she was driving, he announced triumphantly, and
she turned into a telephone pole!
GOOD SAMARITAN:
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of
the Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and
left for dead. She described the situation in vivid detail
so her students would catch the drama Then, she asked the
class, If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all
wounded and bleeding, what would you do?
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, I
think I'd throw up.
DID NOAH FISH?
A Sunday school teacher asked, Johnny, do you think
Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?
No, replied Johnny. How could he, with
just two worms.
HIGHER POWER:
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, We have
been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible
times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me
what it is? One child blurted out, Aces!
MOSES &THE RED SEA:
Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had
learned in Sunday school. Well, Mom, our teacher told
us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission
to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red
Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the
people walked across safely. Then, he radioed headquarters
for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge
and all the Israelites were saved.
Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught
you? his mother asked.
Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher
did, you'd never believe it!
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD:
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class
memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible; Psalm
23. She gave the youngsters month to learn the verse.
Little Rick was excited about the task -- but, he just
couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice, he
could barely get past the first line. On the day that the
kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the
congregation, Ricky was so nervous. When it was his turn,
he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, The
Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I need to
know.
UNANSWERED PRAYER?
The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her
father always paused and bowed his head, for a moment,
before starting his sermon. One day, she asked him why.
Well, Honey, he began, proud that his daughter
was so observant of his messages, I'm asking the
Lord to help me preach a good sermon.
How come He doesn't do it? she asked.
BEING THANKFUL A rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old
boy, So your mother says your prayers for you each
night? Very commendable. What does she say?
The little boy replied, Thank God he's in
bed!
UNTIMELY ANSWERED PRAYER During the minister's prayer,
one Sunday, there was a loud whistle from one of the back
pews. Gary's mother was horrified. She pinched him
into silence and, after church, asked, Gary, whatever
made you do such a thing?
Gary answered, soberly, I asked God to teach me to
whistle... And He just then did!
TIME TO PRAY A pastor asked a little boy if he said his
prayers every night..
Yes sir, the boy replied. And, do you
always say them in the morning, too? the pastor asked.
No sir, the boy replied I ain't
scared in the daytime.
BEWARE OF TRASH One particular four-year old prayed,
And forgive us our 'trash baskets as we forgive
those who put trash in our baskets.
ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS?
When my daughter, Kelli, was 3, she and my son, Cody, would
say their nightly prayers, together As most children do, we
have to bless every family member, every friend and every
animal (current and past). For several weeks, after we had
finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, And all
girls. As this soon became part of her nightly
routine, to include this at the end, my curiosity got the
best of me and I asked her, Kelli, why do you always
add the part about all girls?
Her response, Because we always finish our prayers by
saying 'All Men'!
SAY A PRAYER
Little Johnny and his family were having
Sunday dinner at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was
seated around the table as the food was being served.
When little Johnny received his plate, he started eating
right away.
Johnny wait until we say our prayer.
I don't have to, The boy replied.
Of course, you do, his mother insisted.
We say a prayer, before eating, at our house.
That's our house, Johnny explained.
But this is Grandma's house and she knows how to
cook!
LOT 'S WIFE:
The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife
looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little
Jason interrupted, My Mummy looked back once, while
she was driving, he announced triumphantly, and
she turned into a telephone pole!
GOOD SAMARITAN:
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of
the Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and
left for dead. She described the situation in vivid detail
so her students would catch the drama Then, she asked the
class, If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all
wounded and bleeding, what would you do?
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, I
think I'd throw up.
DID NOAH FISH?
A Sunday school teacher asked, Johnny, do you think
Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?
No, replied Johnny. How could he, with
just two worms.
HIGHER POWER:
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, We have
been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible
times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me
what it is? One child blurted out, Aces!
MOSES &THE RED SEA:
Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had
learned in Sunday school. Well, Mom, our teacher told
us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission
to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red
Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the
people walked across safely. Then, he radioed headquarters
for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge
and all the Israelites were saved.
Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught
you? his mother asked.
Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher
did, you'd never believe it!
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD:
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class
memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible; Psalm
23. She gave the youngsters month to learn the verse.
Little Rick was excited about the task -- but, he just
couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice, he
could barely get past the first line. On the day that the
kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the
congregation, Ricky was so nervous. When it was his turn,
he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, The
Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I need to
know.
UNANSWERED PRAYER?
The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her
father always paused and bowed his head, for a moment,
before starting his sermon. One day, she asked him why.
Well, Honey, he began, proud that his daughter
was so observant of his messages, I'm asking the
Lord to help me preach a good sermon.
How come He doesn't do it? she asked.
BEING THANKFUL A rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old
boy, So your mother says your prayers for you each
night? Very commendable. What does she say?
The little boy replied, Thank God he's in
bed!
UNTIMELY ANSWERED PRAYER During the minister's prayer,
one Sunday, there was a loud whistle from one of the back
pews. Gary's mother was horrified. She pinched him
into silence and, after church, asked, Gary, whatever
made you do such a thing?
Gary answered, soberly, I asked God to teach me to
whistle... And He just then did!
TIME TO PRAY A pastor asked a little boy if he said his
prayers every night..
Yes sir, the boy replied. And, do you
always say them in the morning, too? the pastor asked.
No sir, the boy replied I ain't
scared in the daytime.
BEWARE OF TRASH One particular four-year old prayed,
And forgive us our 'trash baskets as we forgive
those who put trash in our baskets.
ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS?
When my daughter, Kelli, was 3, she and my son, Cody, would
say their nightly prayers, together As most children do, we
have to bless every family member, every friend and every
animal (current and past). For several weeks, after we had
finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, And all
girls. As this soon became part of her nightly
routine, to include this at the end, my curiosity got the
best of me and I asked her, Kelli, why do you always
add the part about all girls?
Her response, Because we always finish our prayers by
saying 'All Men'!
SAY A PRAYER
Little Johnny and his family were having
Sunday dinner at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was
seated around the table as the food was being served.
When little Johnny received his plate, he started eating
right away.
Johnny wait until we say our prayer.
I don't have to, The boy replied.
Of course, you do, his mother insisted.
We say a prayer, before eating, at our house.
That's our house, Johnny explained.
But this is Grandma's house and she knows how to
cook!
"JESUS IS MY Rock"
-
Angelwings - Posts: 710
- Location: Louisiana
- Marital Status: Married
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