Christianity Oasis Forum

[RockofAges]

Alright how do I begin this. This is pretty big, no wait ENORMOUS!

It's all comming together, over the years when it didnt make any sense. I wont reach too far back in time to write it all out on how messy life was for me and those around it. Last few years I thought I was losing my mind, but nope, just didn't know what was going on for what reason and didn't know how to manage it. The two things that remained after all crashed to the ground, family and God's plan for my life. I know it only gets hotter from here, and things won't get better according to my standards and views of how life should be, but every rediculous situation that I encountered in my life either brought on by my ignorance or ingnorance of others, that was God's test check and then the adjustment.

I used to regret past experiences on other christian chat sites and looked at God like, why didnt you just direct me here and that be that instead of all that other junk, since God you knew YOU KNEW I was hurting. Well today it came full circle. You see, I had been running from a calling that in time will be put on me. My dad and I have had so many conflicts through out the years, and my dad and I used to be in my youth two peas in a pod. I won't get into all that had happened in these conflicts, but God was and is up to something. I am fortunate my dad is sold out for Jesus and tears up everytime he talks about those he has lead to Jesus to the winning of their lost souls. I am fortunate my dad adopted me when I was 4. I wish it was all rainbows and unicorns but it wasn't. Part of the struggle was and is, there is an evil being named Satan and man oh man satan had pushed in many sucker punches that left us all bruised limping around angry bitter frustrated broken ect. I would call up my spiritual mother shout in the phone NONE OF THIS MAKES ANY SENSE!!!!!!!! and slam down the phone in rage. She of course would pray ..... I would read the bible pray talk to God sing play it cool but the problems still rolled in. I took on a twisted frame of mind on purpose confusing everyone since I was in the frame of mind ... you confuse me I will dish it out to you to! God still saw my heart in it all, He knew what many don't know.

Anyway, my dad age 81 now had started out 26 years ago a tiny little soul winning ministry then over time became world wide. Main and only purpose, to seek and save that which was lost, the Will of the Heavenly Father Jesus who is God who came to this world for, my dad carried out that calling. Durring this time, my dad and I would fight like cats and dogs. Other days we were cool as a cucomber and I would be assisting him in the ministry. I never made the connection that because we were saving lost souls, satan was after ours on a vicious attack like you would not believe AND STILL IS LOL! I would visit Christian chats for support and growth but the opposite happened by being told woman are to be submissive and quiet blah blah blah, told that I don't qualify, told I am not ready, told me if I do not heed to the word of the lord judgement day was on its way... every suductive creep came out from their hiding places LOL while offline things were off the hook... along the way the real saints of God eye balled what was going on and gave me encouragement and prayer.... but they quickly went on their way because God was leading them else where ....

Last summer I was lined up and ready to further self in computers to futher my dad's ministry since it is now world wide over 69 countries and over 40 here in the US. My dad turned to me and said, this I know is your calling, but BUT a few months later while the ministry magazine was being formed and i was writing up articles of all the amazing things that happened in 2012 for the 2013 magazine, we had another fall out. It was awful. I thought it was over.... my dad was so hurt and I was so crushed.... it looked like satan had won... I visited here and talked to a person in a private message and that person offered their support as well as running into random others who quoted the exact verses I had been thinking about over and over again. Just rescently my dad and I talked together again. It was amazing. He and I had a heart to heart talk. He said to me that he thought for sure FOR SURE God told him that I would take his place in a few years since he is getting old and about to go home. I told him that since I was a tot the day I accepted Jesus in my heart I knew that I knew my calling is to lead the lost to Jesus. I said after all that has happened, things that would have naturally worked for just about anyone else, it didnt work out for me when I gave up and went my own way into careers that offered a promise due to my high grades and effort and devotion, something would always stop it, and everytime in the end the only two things that remain, my sons against all odds, and you and this growing ministry that keeps a wide open door.... I said dad all other doors are slammed shut, it wont let me pass through. I said even my sons that I lead to Jesus when they were tots like I was when I asked Jesus into my heart.... the answer is in the fruit of it. My dad said to me that I run to quickly away from situations and don't stay long enough in the place God put me. My dad said I have to get to the point no matter what attacks, no matter what others say, you cannot let it get to you ever. I said dad I remember when I was little and I pointed out a TALL TREE with branches stretched out and asked you how did it get that tall, and since my dad is a farmer he could explain how.... I said dad I remember your words you said pointing to the branches that seemed to touch the sky, see how those branches are so strong and high, for it to get that big upward, there are roots even bigger that you can't see growing under ground. First a tree grows downward first before it can grow up and out. If it doesn't grow deep roots, it would be knocked down at the first strom that hits it. I said today, dad I need time for those roots to grow deep, deep in truth of God and His love. My dad said to me, if anyone can take over this ministry , it is you. But you can't if you don't endure the hard times and there will be more hard times then easy times.

This time around, after cleaning the mud and spit out of my eyes and wash them clean with the word of God and keep my eyes on Jesus, His promises shall come to pass. All this all these years when something would happen be it an attack or my own flaws or any conflict, it was God saying before He continued, Testing 1 2 3 Testing 1 2 3.


this is my dad's ministry I work in and helped produce the 2013 ministry magazine in all that God is doing in the hearts of those who seek and save that which was lost and now found, those who were saved by the thousands in this soul winning in Christ ministry come back to tell us they are becomming pastors and missionaries as well as others who find a church and grow in and share with their lost family members who then get saved and they reach out and on and on and on

www.christianfarmers.com