Christianity Oasis Member Forum & Chat Room

Day 3 and this could be the hardest triumph for me to accomplish... Forgiving myself. It is so hard to forgive myself for letting my life come this... Watching my son grow up in a life like this... Hearing about the things him, his dad MY HUSBAND, that girlfriend, and her son do from my son hurts my heart. But I will stand for my marriage and for my son. And I Will have faith and believe... In the grace of God. I can't write much today because I have this little boy thats laying next to me that wants more then anything just to cuddle. But I want to Thank God for showing me the wat to this website, God is good...God is great! And I want to thank everyone who has responded to my posts. I love you all and pray for all of you.

God Bless...and Goonight

Hi Sis,
First and foremost....
I know exactly where you are right now and it is a bad place, please do anything you can to get out of it
I spent the last (over) 2years of my life hating myself and not forgiving and being the one to say God please fix me, help me to heal.....the only problem......I still won't allow it to happen myself
You may have read my post on my profile, if you have you've seen I had what I along with some others consider a what I call a wake up call from God, it in itself was AWESOME I have never felt anything like it or that was that clearly FROM God!
I thought wow and had this new energy and need to fight for life again.
But then there he is satan, he starts filling my mind with memories of when I was with my wife and kids, and planting those little hints of info about her and her "new boyfriend" and then the loneliness of me being alone and just wanting to be held by someone and yes I know I am wrong for that but it just rips me up inside when I allow satan to do this but it is not as easy to stop it as some think, so yes I know where you are.

Please turn on Christian music, come here, spend that time cuddling with that little one But just do know you are not alone and God will deliver us both from this pain in His time......His time.
Do not do as I have done and convince yourself you do not deserve.....YES YOU DO!!! you and I BOTH along with many others deserve to be happy but we allow lifes past and mistakes to rule our thoughts and that in turn WILL destroy you

As for your marriage I am proud of what I hear from you but also fearful, you are willing to fight to the death for what committment you made....but it has to be from both sides and if the Lord cannot reach him all this is doing is making things even harder on your heart, PLEASE do not misunderstand I fought for my dead marriage for a long time before giving up and in that time I asked God with a heavy heart to show me either way and over the time He showed me there was no love left between us and the marriage was dead.....BUT this still does not make you to where you can just forget and move on I know, but what I do know is if you sit after God gives you the path it will only destroy what little you have left of you......Please don't allow that
I pray the Lord reaches out to you today and shows you the way and eases your broken heart and gives you hope for happiness again
Cuc

Sister, How about a hug?
I am glad to hear that you have taken the steps you have, but beware of Satan. He will tell you that you are not worth forgivness and convince you that you need "someone" to help you make it. Doubt is his favorite tool. Let me tell you about the man that died for you. That man was tortured and crucified for you. He forgave the men who did the torturing and driving the spikes into him. No matter what Satan tells you, he will forgive you. However, Christ says we are to forgive too and you haven't forgiven a person he loves very much. He can't really forgive you until you forgive his beloved. Who are you to say that Christ's loved one is not worthy of forgiveness????

Once Christ forgives you, he throws your sins away as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more. However, he doesn't remove your memories and that is what the Devil uses to condem you with. Rebuke him and tell him to leave you in the name of Jesus Christ and he will flee for the time being, but he will be back. The best way to fight him is to pray and read the Word and God will give you ammonition to fight Satan with.

My prayers will be with you, Beloved of God.