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Need to learn some new methods of dealing with emotions

Postby mwilson » Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:33 am

I am at a crossroad in my life and my career, I know that unless I put down learned behaivors that served me in the past and pick up new habits for dealing with people and furthering my career that I will not get where I need to be in a timely manner. I have developed a reputation for being negative and flying off the handle becuase I have reacted that why in the past. It seems that when I feel I am not being dealt with fairly or that I am being overlooked or blown off, that I get angry or frustrated and display my emotions,

I work in sales and your numbers and performance guide on how you are promoted within the company. I am great at putting up the numbers, but again being honest I am not the best at followup. Anyway I beat everyone in my office in productions, but when it came to getting to go to a higher level leadership meeting I was overlooked. It really upset me.

I really want to learn and change, any insite I am willing to follow, Someone please help
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Re: Need to learn some new methods of dealing with emotions

Postby Zemirah » Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:40 am

Hi :) Welcome to Oasis *Clap* *Clap* *Clap*

As someone who constantly trips over their emotions, I really suggest that you check out the CCCC 14 day counseling program here - it will help with emotions and with so much more :) you can find it here: http://www.christianityoasis.com/CCCC/Forum.htm

There are also a bunch of studies on dealing with particular emotions if you look here viewtopic.php?f=32&t=21472

again welcome *hug* and I'm sorry you were overlooked this time, and hope that God really blesses and guides you as you seek to find help (including what you will find here!) :)
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Re: Need to learn some new methods of dealing with emotions

Postby dema » Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:06 am

I was in sales. You may not know this, but frequently the top salespeople make more money than many of their managers. And also, you are a breadwinner for the company. It is probably much easier to find another manager than to find someone else who can do what you do.

Why do you want to be a manager? It is quite likely that you wouldn't like it at all. Some people are intense because God made them that way. It sounds like you are. And it is wise to learn to channel and control the intensity when it gets out of hand. But, that same intensity is probably what gives you the drive and the courage to be a great salesman.

There is probably no position in a business harder to fill than that of "Great Saleperson". You talk like it is no big deal being the best at this position. But, I know. I have been in sales and more than that been a business owner and been around business owners and I KNOW - that that is one of the most important, if not THE most important positions in any company. And you act like you are important.

And sales has you on your feet a lot (usually) and talking to lots of people. If you like that, and you must, then being in management might just bore you to tears. Think of what they do all day. And do you really want to have to deal with the same employees day in and day out?

The experts have been saying to work first on what you are good at. That it is best to be excellent at something than to be mediocre at everything. Learning to follow-up, learning to put God more in your day and realizing that maybe you are exactly where they want you to be, where God wants you to be and that you are too valuable to put anywhere else might just make your job glow.

God bless you.
Hugs,
Dema
Shame and blame are the devil's tools. With God ALL things are possible.
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Re: Need to learn some new methods of dealing with emotions

Postby Dora » Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:59 am

Lots of great advice from those who posted.

I feel I am not being dealt with fairly or that I am being overlooked or blown off, that I get angry or frustrated and display my emotions


I have found knowing who I am in Christ helps. Stopping to seek God and how HE thinks of me when others are ignoring or overlooking me, helps a lot. Because He never overlooks you. He never treats you unfairly. He sees every good work you do and will reward you accordingly. Takes practice though and reminders to keep seeking Him every moment.

God bless and keep you. :)
*angel7* Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, But faith looks up! Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and trust in our Creator who loves us.
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Re: Need to learn some new methods of dealing with emotions

Postby humblevisitor » Mon Jul 04, 2011 9:04 am

Boy do i remember that drive to get to the top. Saw the job I wanted and worked as hard as I could to get there. I becme a division manager for a large retail company. Had all the perks: company car, expense account, great trips around the country. Only one problem...when i got there i realized i hated it....lol

Not saying thats gonna happen to you. I do know I gave up a lot of things, like family time, and looking back it really wasn't worth it FOR ME.

I remember the feeling of being overlooked and ignored and i now realize that it was because I was so focused on myself and it hurt when others were not as focused on me as I was. Now I have just a regular retail job where i get to help others and I enjoy it so much more. It will never get me all those perks again, but just the feeling of helping others the best I can every day more than makes up for it :)

Again...that just my experience. Remember the example Jesus gave us...He came to serve and not be served. He also taught that the greatest among us would be the one who serves. :)

Focusing on helping others keeps those emotions away for me...maybe that will work for you :)

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Re: Need to learn some new methods of dealing with emotions

Postby jayney » Mon Jul 04, 2011 3:28 pm

HI
I have just finished reading a book by Joyce Meyer, she has some really great stuff to say about dealing with how you think and feel. Worth a read.
Sending prayers up for you.
Jay
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