Re: New heart, fresh start
Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:13 am
Most of the family has returned home, only a few left here. 4th of July, when US celebrates their freedom. Reminds me of freedom that is found through the cross. Jesus gave it ALL just so we could have the chance to be with Him forever to give us freedom.......... freedom from all the chains that bind us so tightly.
Sometimes i wonder why there is so much pain in this world and i long for the day when there will be no more tears or pain, only joy. Then i wonder how some people, well for lack of a better phrase walk so closely with God that earthly circumstances have such little effect; they are able to keep their Peace of mind and heart in Jesus. Don't get me wrong, i receive much of that WHEN i remember to give it to Him and leave it with Him.
Just a lil sad today. Funeral is tomorrow. Won't know reasons behind cousin's death perhaps for several months. Texted work cuz i am supposed to go back to work tomorrow yet i am going to have to leave at noon. I was already going to have to leave early because for second time i have to have another insurance adjuster come out to re examine damage to my home from the hail storms. Yet several people on same street have already received new roofs, i think its up to eight or nine now which is about half or three quarters of houses on this street.
So, then i find out when the funeral is. So, i text cuz work well.... people either quit or are fired and i was already having to leave a lil early and was gonna show up early and work through lunch and am now having to leave at lunch. Now, i don't know reasons behind people getting fired, but there is such turmoil there. A person got fired Thursday and another one on Friday.It is a place that sets you up to fail. And keeping in mind that probably twenty five to thirty people work there... i can't even count the number who have come and gone.I have worried and worrried and worried and it has gotten me nowhere. I think i am to the point i no longer care. I mean i will still do my job to best of my ability; I am just so tired of all the bull that goes along with working at this place, that i think i am at peace with whatever happens. I have sorta looked for other jobs but thing is so many changes in the field here that very little is out there and most are wanting licensed people (which i am not) Ohhh sorry i lost track of where i meant to go with this the text i receive back is condolences along with a "don't worry about the time you will be missing we will figure out a way for you to make it up"..... ok in my mind i am like cuz i have vacation time built up. I dunno, just i think i am sick and tired of it all.....
I am SO dreading going back to work tomorrow. Sometimes i just wanna lie down and let the world go on without me for awhile. BUT i am certainly very thankful that wasn't the choice that Jesus made. So i think there must be some kind of lesson in this for me i just can't see it at the moment.
Sometimes i wonder why there is so much pain in this world and i long for the day when there will be no more tears or pain, only joy. Then i wonder how some people, well for lack of a better phrase walk so closely with God that earthly circumstances have such little effect; they are able to keep their Peace of mind and heart in Jesus. Don't get me wrong, i receive much of that WHEN i remember to give it to Him and leave it with Him.
Just a lil sad today. Funeral is tomorrow. Won't know reasons behind cousin's death perhaps for several months. Texted work cuz i am supposed to go back to work tomorrow yet i am going to have to leave at noon. I was already going to have to leave early because for second time i have to have another insurance adjuster come out to re examine damage to my home from the hail storms. Yet several people on same street have already received new roofs, i think its up to eight or nine now which is about half or three quarters of houses on this street.
So, then i find out when the funeral is. So, i text cuz work well.... people either quit or are fired and i was already having to leave a lil early and was gonna show up early and work through lunch and am now having to leave at lunch. Now, i don't know reasons behind people getting fired, but there is such turmoil there. A person got fired Thursday and another one on Friday.It is a place that sets you up to fail. And keeping in mind that probably twenty five to thirty people work there... i can't even count the number who have come and gone.I have worried and worrried and worried and it has gotten me nowhere. I think i am to the point i no longer care. I mean i will still do my job to best of my ability; I am just so tired of all the bull that goes along with working at this place, that i think i am at peace with whatever happens. I have sorta looked for other jobs but thing is so many changes in the field here that very little is out there and most are wanting licensed people (which i am not) Ohhh sorry i lost track of where i meant to go with this the text i receive back is condolences along with a "don't worry about the time you will be missing we will figure out a way for you to make it up"..... ok in my mind i am like cuz i have vacation time built up. I dunno, just i think i am sick and tired of it all.....
I am SO dreading going back to work tomorrow. Sometimes i just wanna lie down and let the world go on without me for awhile. BUT i am certainly very thankful that wasn't the choice that Jesus made. So i think there must be some kind of lesson in this for me i just can't see it at the moment.