Christianity Oasis Forum

[Dora]

Comfy! Love it!

Day 14!

The Lord has shown me I have more to work on.
It was drilled into my head no one could ever love me. I see God is beginning to work this out. I've taken some steps in this already. Years ago receiving my spouses love. Really truly believing he loves me. Though this past week I've been driving him nuts with the question, "why?" Also accepting the love of a friend. It's easy if a sister loves me, yet I feel their love is fleeting. When something comes up, and things always do come up, they'll be gone. When I feel a brother loves me, I'm gone. Can't accept it. Shakes me up. What a weird person I truly am. Over the internet it's ok. It's in person when I sense this person cares enough to want to hear what I have to say, that I'm overwhelmed.

One of the issues I was struggling to talk to my counselor about, I went ahead and looked at it, on my own, with the Lord. So it's accepted, and has no effect on me. Though I've been through this before and know what's to come if things fall into the same routine they have, frustration, heart ache, anger, exhaustion, submission. Maybe I can manage to bypass the first three and just skip to submitting it to the cross with all it's emotions. Only with the Lords help can I make it to submission one way or another.

[mlg]

Day 14 my sister...wooohooo...submitting to Christ. You know sis, submitting our hurts to Christ brings about the best healing. Yes some of those hurts are harder to give to Him, because you have to face your fears when you give it to Him. Facing something you fear, is never easy, especially if the fear is like a looming shadow...following you for a very long time. But, here's what's interesting...facing something you fear like that can be done in different ways. You don't have to just turn around and look at it...no way, in fact what you can do is turn to Christ, and ask Him to look at it for you, and to dispose of it. Then you don't have to face the fear alone...you face the fear through Jesus and His blood.

Praying for continued healing for you sis.

luv ya always

[comfy]

It was drilled into my head no one could ever love me.

"no one" > he could speak for himself. And Satan is the one who can not love anyone > he can speak for himself. I think of how people in this evil world can be so about conforming and hanging with fads. This can be because Satan can't deal with having each child of his a unique individual, each with special interests, different problems and faults, unique capabilities and interests > he just wants to clone them all to be the same so he can just use them. So, this is maybe what he was saying, really > how ones of Satan's kingdom can't love *anyone*, because they are so busy with watching to make sure they aren't being different than the others, and they can't love anyone they can't use.

But God does take you as who He knows you are. And He knows what is *really* true of you > your "father" "might" not have even really known you so, how would he know? So . . . isn't the ball in *our* court, then, really? > > >
if we find out the real truth about someone,
*w*i*l*l* we still love that one? ? ?

When I feel a brother loves me, I'm gone.

When I find certain people are loving me, I may go right into how I need to be loving like they are, with all people. I don't get involved too much in whether they love me. However, when ones may be unloving with me, then is when I can get all nih nih nih about not being loved. And how God is with me . . . this kind of gives me the drift of how I myself need to be in love for all people.