Christianity Oasis Forum

[Dora]

This time of year is heavy laden with the unfortunate losses to suicide.

I myself have struggled from time to time this month with some.

So I wanted to share how the Lord has spoken to me through this....

A short time ago when I was struggling heavily with wanting to die and had even planned how I could end my life, I took a day to dedicate to speaking to the Lord.

I began my morning with the question What happens when I am suicidal.

I immediately saw a vision of what appeared to be a place like heaven. And the ground began to tremble and angels began having to rearrange things that were out of place because of my choice. Notice I asked what happens when I'm suicidal not what happens when I commit suicide. Just the thoughts caused disruption in heaven as well as things to need to be rearranged.

So touched by this I asked what happens when I choose to live. Immediately just like before I saw a vision but this time of a place that looked like hell. The earth beneath this place was shaking tremendously.

It was then I realized all I have to do is keep breathing and my life shakes the foundations of hell. How can this be? Because with in me is the presence of the Holy Ghost and in this day His presence is very much needed.

If you struggle with thoughts of ending your life remember that all you have to do is keep breathing and you shake the foundations of the ugly under world. Anything more than breathe will add to the shaking.

Keep breathing.

God loves you and so do I.

[Zinnia]

Wow! Very powerful!

~K

[Christnundrconstruxn]

Thank you sis!!
I hope you see how valuable this info is, You know most of my story and I'm sure you know these thoughts plagued me and still cross my mind BUT it is then I am lifted by my awsome God and Oasis family.
I think those 2 things are 2 of the 3 reasons I am still here.
My belief shows me that the ultimate sin to God would be to take what is His...my life, I know that it is said ALL sins are equal in Gods eyes but I personally feel that this is as I said an ultimate sin...for one reason is you are unable to take this action back so to speak or ask for His forgiveness and repent this sin as with any other.
but also it in my opinion shows God you do not have the faith in Him to get you through you trials, you are basically not only giving up on yourself but also giving up on God.
Those things I mentioned earlier that removes the strength of the suicide thoughts
1) My belief in God and not giving up on Him as I have done on myself
2) my love for my kids, as well as some other family and friends
3) My Oasis family that lifts me WAY above the sick thoughts that I allow satan to slip into my mind

You see if I lose these things I know without a doubt satan would win, at my lowest point exactly 2 years ago I survived my madness by these 3 things and even with these 3 things I came SO VERY CLOSE that it scares me to think back of this time
So with that said I want to thank my God for not allowing me to give up and for blessing me with those 3 beautiful children and for him leading me to the most wonderful website full of people such as you and some others that have stood beside me through it all as well as the ones I have met since.

I pray I will be as useful to someone else here as you all have been to me, Doing His work is what we are here for, I only pray one day to be as He wishes me to be instead of what I have allowed satan to turn me into.
May God continue to bless us all
Cuc

[ServeGod]

Several years ago, I was at a very dark place. For five years i was absent from life. Drinking heavily (a bottle of wine every night) and going to sleep, and praying that I would not wake the next morning. I would think of suicide, and i was that low that i asked God that i didn't care if i was turned to dust, and never to see life again, as long as i wasn't thrown in everlasting burning fire, i just didn't care. Then because of my two children i didn't want to send the message that suicide is a way out. So i started thinking of ways to make it look like an accident. But as low as i was, the presence of God was close, I lost hope, but he did not abandon me, he did not forsake me. During the day i was sobar, for I had to look after my two children. So what i will tell you, is that i was in clear mind. Every day , several times a day, a voice so clear and out of no where would say, "I love you." The presence of God was strong and so were his words. Then one day the voice said, my presence will not be with you so strongly now, but i will leave you with something. Thats when i was blessed with my 3rd child. Being with child i had to stop drinking and smoking (a packet of cigarettes a day).
The thought of suicide has never enter my mind again. God had delivered me from my troubles for yet another day.

[Dora]

That is beautiful!