Christianity Oasis Forum

[simplyme]

I have been married for 18 almost 19 years, our marriage was far from perfect and what things where rough we made it through. We moved in with his mother to take care of her and after 6 months she passed away. There was alot of stress going on and to add to it there was issues of sister her not in this time of mom sickness did you help out. Then when mom did pass away his sister didnt show up for the viewing, i and my husband was taking care of the details. I have to be honest it was not easy time to see mom alice pass the way she did the first 4 hours was rough for her, i saw this proud woman cry that was something she never did, and listened to her good byes and her struggling. Then his sister betrayed me so many times and was spewing wickedness with her tongue, it was hurtful towards me. My husband know of it and saw it, i couldnt take it anymore and i know in our marriage that with my husband he didnt like when i spoke of things that would cause him upset. In our marriage i had learned to make thing work between i heed to the guidelines he set out and one of those he didnt like to be spoken to much and i learned to wait for him to speak to me. But for what ever reason i didnt heed the guidelines and i let out all the stress of events of mama alice, his sister and asked to stand up for me, He asked me not to speak out anymore and i didnt listen i just kept on talking and crying for him to show something for me, that was another thing in our marriage i learned to accept that my husband was one not to show me his love, compassion or to take a stand for me, or even simple support. And so things blew and he left and it would be 4 days i did not no where he was, no calls nothing. Then i called the police to do a missing person report and a few minutes later his sister came over and stated to me she has been in contact with him, and that she had a message from him to me. That i was to move out and that he at this time did not want to talk with me or see me.. So i packed up but know to say his sister made it quite difficult on me on that day and half as i packed my belongings. Two weeks would go by and he finally called me and told me he no longer wanted to live with me. And the reason he said that i was causing him chest pains and his health was important to him. I stayed calm in the call and let the tears fall, i felt like i just got smacked so hard i could not breathe. In that month its moved up to where i wait for the call from him and a visit, but made it clear there would be guidelines to follow to which i have... I apologized for my part to things and that i wanted our marriage, but he started to get upset so i put a lid on it and no longer said anything. Since i have moved out his sister has moved into the house with him, the other day he invited me over and i cooked dinner, but it was so hard for me to face her. He called me outside and told me that i was causing him stress with my behavior towards his sister, and i apologized and promised to change my attitude for which i did. I tried to explain to him how the hurt was there and the betrayal i felt, but it started to cause an issue i dropped it. He does not want to live with me, but he wants to have sex with me. Daily i wait for that call or him to say yes he will visit me and i wait and wait and get happy to hear that yes and do what ever he asks, and i follow the guidelines and if God was real he would know that i have not stepped out i been walking on egg shells around him in fear i will upset him and he will shut me out of his life again. I have made him care pkg of dinner to put into the freezer and other things that he would need and had our soon deliver it. When i talk to him about sports. silly chit chat nothing i would consider stressful to him, but tonight he hurt me again with his words and i CAN NOT TAKE IT ANYMORE..the PAIN is so INTENSE to where i feel i can not do another day. I was on the phone with him had not talked to him today its now almost 9 at night.. i asked how his day was and that i loved him, and so car part talk nothing to cause i felt stress and them BAM these words he stated once again brought me to my knees, he said that he doesnt know why but when he talks to me he gets the pains in chest, i said just with me and he said yes...i told him in a calm voice and the tears where falling he didnt know, i let him know that i have been making sure not to say anything to upset him and he said he know he just didnt know why he could not talk with me with out the chest pains. i apologize and wished him sweet dreams and that i loved him... just the other day he told me that i was someone with a good heart and was a loving wife but he just can not live with me... how did it go so wrong i am pleading to know why>>> i feel my body is dying inside, i have liposarcoma cancer and in this month i have lost almost 20 pounds and the will to fight the disease anymore why> i scream to God if he is real then why i have been forsaken not answer I need to know why my husband throw me away and does not see how this is hurting me like i am just nothing....

[kimby]

(((Simply)))
Praying that God holds you especially close during this time of turmoil and confusion. I pray He comforts your grieving heart and softens the heart of your husband.

[Christnundrconstruxn]

Hi Simplyme,
I want to welcome you to the oasis, I have no answers for you other than trust God to bring you through
I will be praying that He will wrap His loving arms around you and release you from the pain and suffering of the mental AND physical issues in your life, go to Him and ask for rest.
It sounds as if you already know He IS the only one to lead you from this darkness, we can give you suggestions and our prayers BUT the truth is in your walk with the Lord
I pray that He will show you the way
your new friend and brother in Christ
God bless
Cuc

[mlg]

Hello simplyme, I definitely will be offering prayers for you, but I want to share with you that as much as you are going through at this moment...God wants to be your comforter of peace. May you reach out for Him...and allow Him to be near you through the days ahead. There is tomorrow...and God promises us that His mercy is new each morning.



Take care and God Bless