up, down, everywhere in between
Posted: Sun May 25, 2008 5:59 pm
Usually I am able to see the light shining thru even the haziest of days, but not today. I woke up, no hope. I came to oasis which usually refreshes me and nothing. My moods are all over the place. I wanna cry i wanna hide. I am just totally miserable. I know God is there for me. And while in my mind I know He is very close to me right now.. somehow I just cant feel it and even that frustrates me. I have been trying very hard to do the right thing.. i dont even know what the right thing is anymore. I went to chat and then got the blue bleep cuz i talked about a situation at home and while i didnt use any curse words, i guess it was inappropriate cuz teens were in the room. So, where is the safe place when u r full of conflicting emotions and u just wanna scream? Where is it in here? Mostly i love this place,, today i just feel overwhelming sadness and misery. As they say misery loves company. Was planning on going to the sermon tonight. I dunno if i am even gonna do that. Am scared i will say something am not supposed to... am just screaming.. God please help me.