awwwww
my beloved sister,
I just came across this and had to post.
I remember those feelings. And sometimes my past still comes back and haunts me at moments, most of the abuse, i was able to leave at Jesus feet and i can remember when i actually in my heart was able to forgive my abuser. It took 4 yrs of therapy with a christian counselor and still being angry at God and turned my back on Him, got into drugs, went way downhill. and finally one night i begged forgiveness and He met me with open arms. Turns out He had never left. He was crying with me. And comforting me. I did not forgive my abuser at that time, it took me awhile, spending time here, learning and growing but i do remember that it was when i had such totaly clarity of all that God had forgiven me for
When thoughts creep in as the enemy so likes to do to keep us confused hurting to make us less effective for Him and His Glory, yet God STILL loves us. What has worked for me is prayer and worship. demaning thoughts leave in Jesus name. And they go away and then i feel such Peace!!! Though i dont always practice this when i do it totally rocks cuz it works sis
Remember we fight against powers and principalities that we may never truly understand.
Now i am not saying that forgiving abuser is only path to heal. I think that is a very personal encouter between you and God. I do believe and know in my heart that He is the way to truly heal.
I have sorely missed u my sis,,, welcome home !!!
luvs ya