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Im scared.

Postby logi bear » Sat Feb 11, 2012 5:29 pm

God has put it on my heart, repeatedly, over and over and over again, to reach out to Muslim women. But Im scared out of my mind.

To give you guys a background, i have been home bound with a disorder known as Dysautonomia for a little over 2 1/2 years now. My dysautonomia makes my extremely sensitive to light (including lots of colors), noise, temperature changes, smells, touch ect. and If im exposed to too much of those things, i get very sick. So on the rare occasions i leave the house, i usually have to protect myself with sunglasses, and ear plugs (and by doing things like holding my hands over my ears, or holding my breath if I walk by someone with strong perfume, and by not wearing clothing most of the time with abrasive textures like jeans.) And sometimes its not enough, and i get sick anyway. So its impossible for me to just walk over and have a conversation with a Muslim woman about Jesus Christ, in order for me to do that i would have to take my hands off my ears, and take out my ear plugs, and take off my sunglasses so i can make eye contact... and i can't do any of those things. The most i could do is silently offer a Gospel tract, or a typed up piece of paper or card with a message on it. (if she is willing to accept a such a thing from a person in pajamas, with sunglasses on, and ear plugs in, and a feeding tube coming out of their nose. -Yes i look mighty strange when i attempt to venture out in public.)

But i a couple of weeks ago i was praying to God about this, and i started crying because i was so scared, but i told God that if He really wanted me to do this, i would go and i would do it, but i would need Him to go with me and hold my hand the entire time, and i felt Him answer me more powerfully than He ever had in my life, and He told me that He would go with me, He would be there at my side the entire time. But im STILL so afraid. Im like moses when God told him to go before pharaoh, Im scared out of my mind, I'm so scared that i almost want to beg God to choose someone else. Im so scared of what will happen, part of me thinks that even if i just walk up and silently offer a Gosple tract, that like im going to die. I don't know. Its a source of constant anxiety for me, sometimes i think about it, and i start to cry and my knees shakes, and i could really use some prayer right now, i really really need it.
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Re: Im scared.

Postby Mackenaw » Sat Feb 11, 2012 6:02 pm

Hello Logi Bear :)

God bless you this day.

Prayers are rising to our Lord in the name of Jesus, on your behalf. May God's blessed will be done.

I do know that if God calls us to do anything, He will give us whatever it is that we need to accomplish it. God is so very Good!!!

I watched one of your videos the other day -- one of you playing your harp on your Youtube page. Not only was the music beautiful, but it spoke volumes without you speaking a word or looking me in the eyes. Awesome!!! Awesome!!! Awesome!!!

God bless and keep you, Logi Bear.
Love,
Sister Mack
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Re: Im scared.

Postby dantyriverside » Sat Feb 11, 2012 10:01 pm

Hi logi bear I know how it feels to have God tell you something to do and be so afraid that you body aches in defiance. Last summer I met someone on here and we started talking I had just came out of a bad relationship and God said "TRUST ME" I want to say this is the first time he truely spoke so clearly to me as if he was standing next to me. I fought my feelings for this man after all I had illnesses once he found out he would just leave me anyway right. God spoke to me again. "HE WILL UNDERSTAND". Turns out he did. He had Narcolepsy too... He had family member who had depression. He wasnt gonna run. All I had to do was trust God. We are getting married in June. What I am trying to say is trust God. What is the worst that can happen they give the paper back to you, throw it down, turn in a huff...What is the best that can happen you plant a seed that converts a family not just a woman. I dont think you have to worry about being assault by these women if that is your concern. Maybe God has chosen you especially because of your autoimmune disease.(hope I got that right) It would make me think Hey this woman must have something important to say if she is sick and took the time to stand out here and give me this paper I can at least read it. Just food for thought. Whatever you decide remember God is always by your side. You just have to TRUST HIM. I love forward to finding out what you do.

Loves danty
"Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." Mark 11:24
Remember God loves you, :)
danty
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Re: Im scared.

Postby logi bear » Sat Feb 11, 2012 10:48 pm

Thank you so much Mackenaw : ) that meant alot to me.

Dantyriverside, i guess you are probably right about how she will react, i mean i live in the USA, i doubt i will be arrested or attacked or anything for witnessing like some are in other countries. And even if she gets angry, and yells and there is a scene, i know its not my job to control the outcome, it just my job to share the truth. Everything else is in God's hands, and whatever happens to me, God is going to be right there with me.
- oh and Dysautonomia is an autonomic nervous system disorder. : / and one of my many symptoms is sensory overload, my nervous system just can't handle all the stimulation, so when i leave the house, even when i try to protect myself with things like sunglasses and earplugs, and by holding my hands over my ears, by not wearing abrasive clothing ect i still get sick almost every time anyway. : (
Right now im in the processes of making my own Gospel tracts, centered around the prophesies Jesus fulfilled. (I just couldn't find any suitable tracts online, focused on the idea that Jesus was the Messiah) needless to say, it is a long process to go through them all.
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Re: Im scared.

Postby HelloMyNameIsSimon » Fri Feb 24, 2012 4:31 am

Hi Logi Bear,

I think you are amazing and the world needs people like you to spread the Word. I praise God that He has called you and I know that you will plant many seeds. And you encourage people like me to want to serve God more. I pray that He gives you everything you need.

May God Bless you!
Simon
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Re: Im scared.

Postby logi bear » Mon Apr 09, 2012 2:29 pm

Hey guys, : ) on the rare occasions that I have left the house to go to physical therapy and doctors appointments and whatnot... I have not had the chance to hand a Muslim a gosple tract.. but I have been more courageous about witnessing online, as I do encounter them online, and others who I know have not accepted Christ! : )
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