Christianity Oasis Forum

[saint701]

Hello All,


Blessings!

I once heard Sarah Palin use 2 Timothy 1:7 on television with a complete lack of confidence. It was as though she was sqeezing out a line in a script she was having trouble memorizing. (2Tim.1:7, God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind). During the early 80's I was somewhat a fan of Kenneth Hagin. He taught me about spiritual things on his radio programs each day, when no, not anyone else was doing so. He was never about money. He taught about the word of wisdom, the word of knowledge, wonder working faith, etc. He gave scriptural examples of what he taught about and I liked that. He also gave personal illustrations of the gifts, administrations, and operations worked through him by the Holy Spirit. His ministry was never about money. He only asked for a $25.00 donation for Rhema Bible Training School once a year and that was it.

Most of us know he was about faith and having a living confession of those words in the New Testament that built us up in just that, faith. I had my own. I had it written down on paper and I taped it to play in my car on the way to work and on the way home. One of those confessions was 2 Timothy 1:7. For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. My faith confessions increased my boldness, my faith in God, and even my faith in my faith.

But I had no, not any clue where my spirit was in me, what he was, how he would operate, and what kind of help he was supposed to give me. I did have a few questions. I would read John chapter 17 and wonder why I wasn't having those spiritual experiences because I knew where the Holy Spirit was within me. He was in my heart, and He manifested His presence with the warmth you might experience standing next to a pot bellied stove. (Really sad, but it never dawned on me that my spirit was located where the Holy Spirit was within me) He is also called the Comforter, so when the fire came on in my heart I was comforted. That was pretty cool, but when I described the Lord's presence within me to a much older, stronger and wiser spiritual woman, she said, "Well, you ought to know that isn't going to last." She sure missed that one, as such continues within me to this very day.

However, as with John 17, scriptures like Ephesians 1:17 were just spiritual things somwhere out there in operating in someone, and the same with most of the spiritual gifts, administrations, and operations. I could speak in tongues and interpret what I said. I would prophecy and sing beautiful music when I was in the Spirit and no one else was around, and my faith could be felt by anyone I prayed in person with. In fact, my faith became so strong I could effect a situation 1,000 miles away in terms of something I wanted. But I was still a novice. My results from my faith made me proud and I needed to be slapped down. That came with each and every fiery trial of the devil I had to endure.

Scriptures like If God wills I will do this or that were just down right weird. Every Christian I knew did whatever they wanted to do. When I see Him I'll be like Him was like, you have to be kidding. I had cried "Abba, Father," the Holy Spirit bearing witness with my spirit that I was a child of God, but as I grew I often asked, but where is Dad? (It never dawned on me that Dad was in my heart in the Person of the Holy Spirit) Christianity of the day was prosper as your soul prospers and name it, claim it instead of abide in Him. (I didn't know how to abide Him either, so if those ministers I was listening to explained it I still probably didn't have much of a clue.) Flee fornication was to me, "but many Christians aren't!" And with the ones I knew that were doing it I couldn't see any negative side effects.

Confessing that I had a spirit of power, and of love, and of a sound mind helped me have faith, so I assumed the Holy Spirit was deeply involved in that, but I never connected the relationship of Christ within being able to do super abuntantly more than I could ask or think. (I didn't understand Christ within me was the Spirit He had given me of Himself) Nevertheless, I had the be strong in faith part down pretty good, as that, I was taught, was what mattered.

The idea of our Lord of Lords, King of Kings, Lord God Almighty Love Dad raising me up in His likeness was hard for me to believe. Many scriptures just confused me. For example, "He that has begun a good work in you will perform it to the end." I wanted to rely entirely on God, but the faith bunch put so much weight on my shoulders to carry the burden of my salvation I stumbled over our Lord doing just that. I mean, my faith was so great I gradually moved it off the path of salvation to use it to get what I wanted for me, not what God wanted me to use it for. I was blind to the fact that I was just sounding brass and tinkling symbol.

Afterall, no matter how often I confessed I had the love discussed in 1 Cor. ch. 13, I didn't. And no matter how often I confessed that I had the mind of Christ of,(1Cor.16:8), I didn't. As for having a spirit controlled temperament, my temperament went from a somewhat calm and peaceful exterior to a fire fueled inferno rivaling the hottest nitro driven dragster.

Receiving a scourging from my Heavenly Dad never crossed my mind, and Him cutting me back to the vine stem so I would produce more fruit didn't register either. Having faith will not keep you from being booted out into the wilderness of sin, but it will get you out of it as it comes time to enter the promised land. Entering the promised land is where you really begin to understand God is at work within you for His will to be done and not yours. You understand that He is in you to will and to do. You come to know Him personally. He sheds His love abroad in your heart. He lets you feel His great power within which is quite beyond our faith and independent of our working.

Back in the U.S. mid December 08 the Lord began to lead me though a repentance which was in fact kin to the warfare the people of Israel experienced entering the promised land. That is the analogy. They fought to enter the promised land. We have to fight to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

As Paul declared to many disciples, Acts 14:[22] Confirming the souls of the disciples, and exhorting them to continue in the faith, and that we must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God.

This period of firey trials lasted until the end of April 09. However, it was in the middle of that same month that the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ visited me in person. He engulfed me in His presence, and confirmed my sonship by shedding His love abroad in my heart. At that point I learned what it meant to have a spirit of power and of love and had finally come to understanding of the working of my inward man. Toward the end of the month, after the love change, came the final fiery trial. Having a soul with understanding and a spirit of power and love, I threw my entire heart and soul into the battle until I overcame the wicked one.

Winning that fiery battle with the greater fire of God in my spirit began the process of renewing my mind. Many revelations came to me, most all I will share on here. Those revelations have helped greatly to produce a wholeness and soundness in me characteristic of a sound mind.

Now I can honestly say with understanding that God has given me a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. The question of whether salvation is my burden or that of the Lord has been answered. It is He that is within me to will and to do, to teach, comfort, and guide. It is He that is the author and finisher of my faith, the author of our God kind of love, and our overcoming faith in Him. His great strength within us is a consuming fire that devours it's adversaries, but that same fire that devours, is the same fire that protects us from the gates of Hell, and delivers us from it's firey attacks. Most importantly, we learn that our Heavenly Dad's fire presence within us is what we are growing to be...in His likeness, with His attributes, havning His love nature, His mind, and His power.

At this time my temperament is mostly under the control of my spirit. It is difficul to get words of anger out of my mouth before the inward man shuts me down.

We must all continue in the faith if we would grow to understand what it means to be a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind.


Blessings!
Love, In Christ Jesus, saint